


Never Be Ourselves

by ghulehabsolution



Series: Never Be Ourselves [1]
Category: Ghost (Sweden Band), Repugnant (Band)
Genre: Alcohol, Angst, Anxiety, Blood and Violence, Car Accidents, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Eventual Romance, Eventual Smut, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Halloween, Hospitals, Love Confessions, Miscommunication, References to Drugs, Romance, Sexual Tension, Sleepy Cuddles
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-07
Updated: 2021-03-07
Packaged: 2021-03-08 04:54:55
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 32
Words: 66,700
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26870008
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ghulehabsolution/pseuds/ghulehabsolution
Summary: Mary and Wendy have been best friends for a few years now and they've somehow unknowingly placed each other in the dreaded friends zone. However, as October gets into itself, cracks begin to present in the solid foundation of their friendship...*Mary is a wholesome little babe in this fic (still a bit rough around the edges), so not entirely belonging to the Repugnant universe as usually depicted.*Will update tags as chapters require.
Relationships: Mary Goore/Original Female Character
Series: Never Be Ourselves [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2029585
Comments: 90
Kudos: 61





	1. Candy Corn and Peanut Butter Kisses

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fic on here, so please be kind! Always open to constructive criticism though!

October 1st 

“We get that spot at Inverted next week?” She looked up from the notepad while Mary sat on the floor with his gaze on another showing of Poltergeist. “Hey, Goore, you’re going to need glasses if you sit that damn close.” She chucked a piece of crumpled up paper at the back of his head. “Fuck off!” Mary snapped his head around briefly to glare at her before returning to the TV. By this point Carol Ann’s brother was screaming and pointing at the white static of the floor model television. It had practically just began and she had to sit through the whole damn thing before Mary would give her any attention whatsoever. This was a usual thing with him, and she had given up fighting it. 

“Yeah,” He turned the TV off and moved over to a comfy recliner beside the couch. His legs folded up nicely as he leaned back against the brown velvet, and his green-eyed gaze met hers. “We got that but lost out to some poppy-rock wannabe band with Fred’s bar.” 

“You win some and lose some, I guess.” She shrugged and crossed Fred’s bar off the list with a dark red pin. “Yeah, I guess.” Mary rolled his eyes. “You gotta fight for it though, Dee; you aren’t a fighter like me.” 

“And that is why I send you to do my bidding.” The brunette grinned and popped a piece of candy corn in her mouth. “That is fucking gross.” Mary twisted his lips. “Candy Corn is a superior piece of Halloween candy, my friend. The sooner you figure that out, the better off you’ll be.” A handful more of this glorious chemically colored sweets and she winked before pelleting a couple of pieces at his face. “Fuck, that hurts, Dee!” Mary groaned. “Right in the eye!” She cheered. “If I get a fucking black eye from a piece of candy I’m gonna be pissed.” 

She couldn’t help it as a laugh escaped her mouth at the sight of Mary’s utter distain for candy corn and her friendly abuse. “You’re always pissed, Mare.” Mary just grumbled while he moved from his comfortable spot on the recliner to the empty space beside her. “Ugh, let me see.” She grabbed his face softly to examine the tiny red mark below his eye. Mary breathed softly while he watched her blue eyes trace over his features before bringing her gaze back to his stare. Dee smiled sweetly as she brought her lips closer to his face, leaning in to kiss the small mark. “You’re tough, I think you’ll make it, Goore.” She grinned and pulled away. 

Mary’s heart fluttered as Dee turned her attention back to the little notebook in front of her. His eyes traced her features for a moment, especially those perfectly plump kissable lips. They were always covered in whichever new Chapstick she managed to find at her little frilly stores she frequented in town. However, with all the candy she had just consumed he couldn’t tell what the flavor was without a big whiff of fucking candy corn. 

“Do I have something on my face?” Dee flicked her gaze from the book back to Mary while smiled slightly and shook his head. “Well, what is it then, Mare; is my makeup bad, because you know, I tried this new smoky eye thing and I suck at looking pretty.” 

“Whatever, Dee, you always look pretty, even without makeup. Not a lot of people can just do that, you know?” Mary quipped and tried but failed miserably to divert his gaze. “You just, you look really nice today.” Dee arched her brow and sat the book down on her lap for a moment. “Mary Goore says I look nice today…what are you up to, Mare?” 

“What?” Mary grumbled and folded his arms. “Can’t I give you a compliment, Dee; you look fuckin’ pretty, alright?” His body looked so tense as he scoured at the blank television set. Dee felt bad instantly, realizing that Mary was genuine. At the same time, her heart fluttered at the compliment. Mary was never this sweet, well, not usually, not until recently. 

“Thank you.” Dee spoke quietly and placed a hand on his upper thigh. “I really appreciate that, even though I don’t think I’m pretty.” 

“Well, you are.” Mary grumbled again still clamed up like an angry toddler. “Mare,” Dee whined. “Don’t be mad, OK; I’m sorry.” Mary still sat there brooding as she pounced on him, wrapping her arms around his body from the side until they tumbled over on the couch. “Get off me, I’m still mad.” Mary tried to push her away. “Nu-uh, nope! Not until you give into my love!” 

Dee wrangled Mary until he was flat on his back and she had straddled his waist still trying to wrap her arms around his body, being met by playful protest as laugher erupted from his thin frame while she poked his sides. His laughter was infectious and instantly warmed her heart while he squirmed beneath her. 

“Fine! Fine!” Mary squealed. “I give! I give!” Just short of involuntarily throwing them both into the floor, Mary hooked his arms underneath hers and pulled Dee onto his chest, enveloping her into a comfortable hug. She smiled against the black fabric of his shirt as her legs splayed back behind her, so she was lying flat on his body. 

He smelled amazing a mixture of cigarette smoke, knock off Acqua Di Gio, and Mary Jane Peanut Butter Kisses; his go to Halloween candy. It was a strange combination, but it worked for Mary. To her he smelled delicious; familiar in every aspect as she nuzzled her face against his neck, really getting a whiff of his cologne. Mary ran his fingers up and down her back soothing her even further until her body slumped comfortable against him. 

“Mmm, this is nice.” Dee mumbled softly and placed a single kiss on his neck before nuzzling again. Mary’s heart fluttered at this familiar touch, though that is all it was, a touch. 

“Have you given into my love yet?” She yawned. “Babe, I think you’re the one giving in.” Mary chuckled quietly. “Maybe.” Her shoulders lightly shrugged. “Can we take a nap just like this?”

“Sure, babe, just relax and close your eyes.” He smiled to himself and gently tugged the mint green woven blanket over their bodies. “Tell me the story of when we first met.” Mary grinned softly and agreed while Dee fell into a deep sleep, her warm breath felt moist against his pale skin. 

Dee, or, Wendy, and Mary were the most unlikely pair of friends. Wendy was short, had medium length brunette hair that always seemed to be styled like a tamed Farrah Fawcett. Her eyes were a beautiful blue, well, some of the time. Other times they seemed to change to a deep grey. They were beautiful, nonetheless. Her frame was small but curvy. She always called herself ‘skinny fat’, though Mary hated that term. She was thin but soft in all the right places. Her makeup was always done up nice when she decide to wear it. Nothing heavy, usually, just foundation, mauve colors, mascara and tame winged eyeline. She truly was beautiful with or without it. 

Meanwhile, Mary was a few inches taller, thin, had coal black hair that was short in the back, but came to a v-bang in the front. It was sort of matted together occasionally with the makeup when he wore it, but other times he would either add some product to keep it just so or slick it back. His eyes were a beautiful shade of green and his lips were perfectly shaped, making it hard to resisted the adorable pout he seemed to have when in deep thought. Oh! And don’t even get started on his thighs. Mary was fucking skinny, but somehow the Gods, Satan, whoever, blessed this man with the shapeliest thighs and ass one could imagine. He knew it too, and that is why he always seemed to wear the tightest skinny jeans he could fit this glorious part of his body in. Alright, alright enough about his features…

“It was two years ago to the day…” Mary drifted into his memories as his fingers ran through Wendy’s hair.


	2. When Mary met Wendy Pt. 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As requested by Wendy in the previous chapter, here is part one of two explaining the happenings surrounding the first time they met.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Still getting my footing, so stick with me if you wish! I appreciate all of the kudos and comments so far! Also, I apologize for splitting this up into two chapters. It would have been entirely too long otherwise.

There he was muttering ineligible words with a sharp guttural tone while his lips were pressed against a microphone. Wendy had managed to wade her way through the violent crowd of people to stand right against the barrier of the stage. She had never heard anything like this, with such a fuck off attitude in his voice and demeanor. The blood running down his paint covered face as he furrowed his brows in concentration while a solo came up and he stepped back from the mic, sent a thrill through Wendy in a way she had never experienced with music. She was well versed in most every genre, but not death metal. It was just never something to her taste, not until now with adrenaline pumping through her veins almost in time with the beat. 

Wendy was thankful for this unknown man delivering her first experience with such cold enthusiasm as his incredible eyes caught her gaze. She was the only one not moving while her arms rested against the barrier. The look on her face as she gleamed up at the whole band was as if they were the fucking Beatles or something. Whoever she was, she didn’t belong in the pit, let alone at the show at all. Her hair was a beautiful brown hanging just past her shoulders in a way that reminded Mary of a tamed Farrah Fawcett. And her eyes were beautiful blue, the color perfectly highlighted by the mauve colored eyeshadow and lipstick she chose to wear. Mary furrowed his brows curiously as he looked her. Mystery woman was wearing a white long-sleeved dress shirt, unbuttoned four down, a short black pleated skirt and matching black flats. She didn’t fucking belong. It wasn’t safe for the likes of some prissy princess wanna be; and Mary didn’t like feeling as if he had to keep an eye on her the whole fucking show ensuring her safety. She was holding her own though as she concentrated on his voice, letting the pushing and shoving from those around her just fall into the background. 

Ending his set with a song he claimed was his favorite off the EP his band had released a year before, Mary was happy to be done with the crowd and the Prissy Princess as he exited the stage through the back with his bandmates. Finally he could have a few drinks with his friends and find a warm body for the night. The crowd had thinned considerably once he made it out to the bar, thankfully, with no sign of the princess waiting for him. He just wasn’t in the mood that night. 

“You see that chick at the barrier tonight?” Al looked over from the bar as he graciously grabbed two chilled glasses of whiskey. “Which one?” Mary scoffed as he accepted one of the glasses. “Ah, that one, you know, the rich bitch in the business clothes?” Mary let out a laugh and took a swig of his drink before nodding. “Yeah, what was with that; acted like we were the fucking Beatles or somethin’; I mean, we’re good, but not the Beatles.” Al grinned and shrugged. “Maybe this was her first time at a death metal show…or the more likely choice, she wants to fuck one of us; hell, maybe all of us.” 

Mary shook his head violently and folded one of his arms under the other. “No fuckin’ way, man. Those rich bitches are just that, bitches…they think it’s all fuckin’ cool to brag about getting dicked by one us, then talk shit about us after. Fuck that.” 

Mary had every reason to feel so callous about the ‘rich bitches’ who seemed to pop up at the shows every now and then. Maybe that was a story for later though. 

Meanwhile, Wendy was in an empty bathroom changing to clothes her friend Janice had brought for her. A pair of black leather leggings, black lace up boots, a The Devil In Miss Jones t-shirt and a silver inverted cross necklace. 

“Sorry I was late getting here.” Janice huffed as Wendy threw her work clothes over the stall, walking out a few seconds later. 

“It’s all good. The place should be closed down soon. Not like you missed much…but the band was good, great actually.” 

“So you liked Mary’s band, huh?” Janice smiled. “Mary?” Wendy looked curiously as they walked backstage. “Yeah, the singer.” She nodded. “We’ve been friends for, well, a long time; since high school.” 

“Interesting.” Wendy narrowed her eyes into the black curtain by the stage. “Well what did you think though, I know death metal isn’t your thing.” “It’s not that it isn’t my thing, I’ve just never experienced it live.” She shrugged. “But it was great; I’m going to stop by Archies for some records tomorrow to study up on it.” 

Wendy just smiled and squeezed her friends shoulder as they stood listening to the quieting chatter with each passing moment. 

Still adrenalized from the show, Wendy was practically floating as she pulled her guitar strap around her back. 

“Hey, you guys can go on out there; we’re ready to close up in about ten minutes.” The stagehand, Matt, popped up as Wendy, Janice, Marcus, Tre and Adam joined in a quick circle. “It’s going to be a fucking disaster, but let’s make it a good one, eh?” Wendy nudged Janice as they all laughed. “It’s just practice anyway.” 

Though a few people from the show remained in their own conversations, the place was empty enough to be comfortable for them. However, Wendy noticed the singer with the face paint sitting by the bar with his bandmate. All of a sudden he made her nervous as their gaze connected. Soon he was just as curious about her as she had been about him, though he didn’t realize she was the same girl in the white shirt and black skirt. 

“Disaster?” Mary arched a brow as he looked ahead and the hot girl with the guitar. “You know it.” Al snorted. “There’s no fucking way she actually knows how to play…good, anyhow.”

“Alright, they don’t suck, next round is on you; but if they do, which they likely will, next round is on me.” Mary chuckled and shook his head before turning his attention back to the stage. 

While the band got comfortable, the owner, Davis, took a seat by Mary and Al. He had been eager all week to see what Wendy and the gang had to offer after she promised to deliver a helluva set if he’d let them just open for somebody. 

“What’s the deal, man?” Mary asked without breaking his gaze. “They’re here to practice and give a preview.” Davis nodded before taking a sip of his drink. “You know I have a soft spot for Janice, so when she asked if her friends band could try for a slot, I agreed.” 

Now Mary was entirely curious and wanted the scoop from Janice about this mystery girl and the whole band, well, if they were actually tolerable. 

Before anything else could be side, Wendy started in on the first song with her eyes fixed ahead to the set of windows at the entrance. There was no way she could look at the guys to her right, obviously judging her harder than fucking American Idol. They were all metal elitist assholes and there was no way she could ever stand a chance, or so she thought. 

“Holy shit.” Mary gawked as she made it to the first chorus. “Drinks on your, man.” It took everything in Mary not to let his mouth hang open as Wendy let out slight guttural screams every now and then. Though it was incredibly far from anything death metal, it was still fucking good. It was fucking great! She could play and sing better than he had ever expected and they weren’t even finished with the first song. 

Gaining confidence as they bled into the next song, Wendy finally looked over to Mary, his friend and the owner all huddled up with their mouths practically gaping open. She held Mary’s gaze for just a moment, her heart pounding out of her chest at the prospect that maybe they didn’t really suck that bad. Either way, she wanted to know what he thought. 

“Holy fucking shit!” Al looked with wide eyes. “That’s her, man!” He smacked Mary’s arm. “Fuck! That hurt, man.” Mary rolled his eyes. “Who, fucking who?” “That’s the rich bitch, man; look at the bracelet on her arm.” 

Mary zeroed in on the black cloth bracelet on her left wrist, the same one from the show. Al was right, this was rich bitch prissy princess. How the actual fuck? Mary had friends in death metal bands who were fucking lawyers and even teachers, but there was something about her that seemed so mild that it was impossible to picture. Most of them he could pin, but not this mystery girl. Janice had never mentioned her either and they talked somewhat frequently. Hell, she didn’t even mention that she was in a new band. 

Wendy felt a shiver move down her spine as she realized that he realized who she was. Fuck. She was now torn between wanting to dart backstage and never stop running; or walking right up to him for a chat. He probably could’ve given a fuck less though and she reminded herself of this. 

“Can we get a round of shots up here, Davis?” Janice spoke into the mic after the song had ended. “Sure thing, babe!” Davis grinned before pouring a round of whiskey shots. Mary and Al just sat there watching as Davis carefully walked the tray over for the band to graciously accept. 

“To the night!” Janice grinned before clinking glasses with Wendy, both of them promptly throwing them back quickly. Wendy grimaced and wiped her mouth with the back of her hand before placing the glass at the edge of the stage. Mary chuckled to himself at her twisted lips, entirely amused by this whole thing. 

“Ready?” Janice looked over to Wendy who hesitantly nodded before kicking off a gnarly cover from a band Mary knew well. “Oh shit, this ain’t gonna end well.” Al gritted his teeth before throwing back the rest of his drink. “No one can cover them, not even us…it’s fucking sacrilegious.” Mary just shrugged, not wanting to throw the baby out with the bath water. She had done well thus far, maybe she would surprise them, though it was unlikely. They weren’t the only ones curious about this song choice. The handful of patrons who had sat carelessly in conversation during the other songs were now sitting to attention. 

Her voice just raspy enough from the whiskey and strain of singing the previous songs, Wendy went at it with a force that could match just about anyone. “Fuck me running.” Al huffed while Mary caught his foot tapping against the tiled floor to the beat. His knee bouncing did not go unnoticed by Wendy though she didn’t make a deal of it. 

However, she couldn’t ignore the small crowd that erupted in praise, literally everyone but Mary, as the song ended. He was sizing her up and that was enough to deflate all the praise surrounding Wendy. She was polite though accepting the praise. With the final song complete, the band left the stage. Wendy stayed behind and slipped off her guitar before sitting on the edge, her feet dangling as she looked down at her hands. 

It sucked to be so taken by someone who already had a sized-up view of who they believed you probably were…


	3. When Mary met Wendy Pt. 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize in advance as some of this should have been italicized. However, I have not figured out this particular function on AO3 yet.

“Hey asshole!” Janice greeted Mary warmly with a hug. “Hey Jan,” Mary half smiled. “so you’re in a new band now, huh? Forgot to mention that?” Janice just smirked and shook her head. “We’ve just been playin’ around; you know how it is…just sort of letting Wendy find her voice.” 

“Wendy?” Mary arched his brow curiously as Janice accepted a fresh drink from behind the bar. “Yeah, porno shirt, leather pants…our singer.” 

Mary casually glanced past Janice and caught some piece of shit guy dropping some powder in a drink before high fiving his buddy. It could’ve been sugar, protein powder, vitamins…but Mary knew it wasn’t any of those things as the guy walked towards Wendy. It all happened too fast. Mary felt an immense need needed to protect her, so he filled a fresh glass with whiskey and rushed past the group. 

“Wendy, is it?” The burly guy grinned as he peered down at her, prompting her to nod. “Well, Wendy, for your amazing performance, I bought you a drink. We don’t see enough rad chicks covering harder stuff and this is the least I could do.” Hesitant to ever accept a drink from a stranger, Wendy fought with herself for a moment; but then she thought back to the stone-faced judgement from Mary and wrapped her hand around the cooled glass, a small smile on her lips. Drink in hand, she instantly hated herself for letting feelings override better judgement. 

“Thank you—” “Oh, right, Garth.” Wendy nodded. “Thank you, Garth; I appreciate your kind words, it means a lot coming from someone who was here to see—” 

“There you are!” Mary grinned as he stepped in between Wendy and Garth before turning to wrap his arms around her for a hug. “Dude laced that drink, here’s a fresh one.” Mary whispered hot against her ear as he carefully switched them out behind her back. “Uh, you mind, man?” Garth huffed. “Kinda in the middle of somethin’ here, asshole.” 

“Did you think that maybe we were in the middle of something prior to your arrival, asshole?” Mary flicked his eyes to Garth as a small fire began to form in his chest. He had promised himself he wasn’t going to get into a fight that night and had no intentions until Garth decided to be a fucking creep. “But alright, in the middle of what exactly; you trying to drug my girlfriend?” 

“Wh-what?” Garth furrowed his brows. “I fuckin’ saw you, man; you thought you and your buddy were slick or somethin’, high fiving before walking over here.” Mary stood toe to toe with this guy who towered over him. “You are some of the worst, you know that; attempting to take someone’s will away for your own fucked up pleasure.” 

“Says the guy who’s accused of fucking corpses.” Garth retorted. Wendy didn’t believe it for a second. She was more concerned with Garth’s demeanor. Rather than defend himself, he didn’t even deny what he had done, just deflected. 

“Do you believe everything you hear, Garth?” Mary smirked at this longstanding rumor. “You know what, a meaningless fuck isn’t worth this shit.” Garth backed away, lazily flopping his hands out from his sides to make a point. “You weren’t that fucking good anyway, sweetheart.” His eyes flicked to Wendy with a small smirk on his face. 

“Oh shit.” Janice could barely get the words out from across the room before Mary punched the guy square in the nose with a trail of blood following soon after. “You broke my fuckin’ nose!” Garth groaned and he held his face while Mary tackled him to the ground and began punching any place his fist could reach. “You piece of shit!” Mary growled. “Don’t you ever come near her again, you understand me?!” He was in a blind rage as he pummeled Garth until Al, Davis and Adam had to pry him off. “You’re gonna kill him, man!” Al yelled as he gripped one of Mary’s arms while Adam grabbed the other and Davis had his torso. “He’s learned his lesson, Mare, just breathe and let it go.” 

Wendy sat there in horror watching the blood fly, unable to move from her seated position while she gripped the glass of warm whiskey between her hands. All this over a drink for a stranger he didn’t even know and previously seemed to have a distaste for. 

“Now get the fuck out of my bar and don’t ever come back!” Davis yelled while still holding Mary back as Garth and his friend scurried out of the bar, almost tripping while he bled on the floor. “You’re fucking crazy, man!” Garth yelled one last time as he pushed past the glass double doors. 

“Go walk it off, Mare.” Davis let go and pat his back while Al and Adam dropped his arms. Mary ripped his body away not even looking back at Wendy before walking towards the back exit. The adrenaline pumped through his body with a familiar force as he paced the alley, looking down at his bloodied and bruising knuckles. “Fuckin’ piece of shit!” Mary growled before kicking the brick wall a few times. Mary had learned from a young age to defend those who were defenseless, and Wendy was, at least for not knowing what that guy was up to. 

“Hey, you good?” Janice walked over to a visibly shaken Wendy. Her hands trembled as she sat the glass down next to the drink that had started it all. “Y-yeah.” She stuttered. “What happened, Wendy; what did that guy say that send Mary off?” 

“Apparently…h-he, um, he laced a drink and tried to gi-give it to me.” Wendy nodded, her gaze still following the trail of blood on the floor. “Mary tried to…to…step in between and gave me a new, um, a new drink.” She nodded. “The guy wouldn’t budge though and called Mary an asshole…and it all took off from there.”

“You alright?” Al walked over, a sheepish expression on his face before sipping his drink. “Yeah…I’m fine.” Wendy breathed. “Cool, well, I’m going to check on Mary, so I’ll see you guys around.” “Wait,” Wendy called out as she stood up from the stage, her knees a little wobbly for a moment. “Let me.” Al chuckled and shook his head. “I don’t think that’s a good idea, sweetheart. Mary stays a little feral after a fight.” 

Wendy wouldn’t accept no for an answer as she walked past him, grabbing the first-aid kit from Davis’ hands before pushing the heavy metal door open. 

There Mary stood back against the brick wall, a constant cool breeze rushing through with October having fallen over the city. It was dark, but not too dark that she couldn’t make out his features and the dried blood on his knuckles while he held a cigarette up to his lips for a deep inhale. He was strangely handsome for a walking corpse and obviously had some extra brownie points for having saved Wendy from danger. 

“Hey,” She spoke quietly as the heavy door slammed shut behind her, almost startling Mary from his thoughts. He never spoke, just gave her a quick nod before looking back at the cracked asphalt. Wendy noted that he didn’t seem so feral as Al had promised. Mary was actually calm and quiet as Wendy sat the first-aid kit on the lid of a dumpster. She carefully pulled a bottle of antiseptic, scissors, bandages and tape from the box before gently closing it. 

“You busted your hands up pretty good, huh?” Wendy now stood beside him, the scissors and tape in her back pocket while she held everything else. “It’ll heal in a few days.” Mary shrugged. “Well in the meantime, can I at least clean them up, so they don’t get infected?” 

Mary turned his head to look at Wendy for a moment. What did he have to lose? Taking one last drag of his cigarette, he let the smoke expel from his lips before dropping the butt to the ground for an unceremonious squashing. His hands looked pretty bad, hints of caked blood, scrapes and purple bruising. However, neither of them were sure where his blood ended, and Garths began. 

Wendy gently took his right hand in hers and looked it over for a moment. His fingers were so long and thin, the pads callous and worn. He’d obviously been a musician for a lot longer than her. Surprisingly though, his palms were somewhat soft and incredibly warm. Mary watched her intently as she popped the top on the bottle in her hand. “This might sting a little.” She said before pouring the watery blue liquid on his knuckles. Mary grumbled at the sensation but remained quiet as she expertly wiped the blood away with a cotton pad. She was so gentle with him, treating his skin like a silky flower. To both their surprise, it wasn’t near as bad as it previously looked. Most of the blood caked on his hands was from Garth. Sure, there was a gash or two on a couple of knuckles and some definite bruising, but nothing Wendy couldn’t take care of. 

“Thank you, you know.” She flicked her gaze to his face momentarily before moving on to cutting the gauze to wrap around his hand. “It’s nothing.” Mary waved off her gratitude. “Just saw something that needed to be delt with and did it.” 

“Still, I’m grateful.” A small smile tugged at her tips. “I’m Wendy by the way…” Her hand was outstretched towards him, expecting his now bandaged hand to meet hers. Mary looked from her face to her hand for a moment, intrigued by her politeness. Feeling an intense sense of rudeness he didn’t like; Mary hesitantly shook her hand. “Mary Goore.” He nodded.

Wendy was in a full-on smile as she dropped his right hand and moved onto the left. Things were silent for the longest time, giving Mary some unfamiliar anxiety he couldn’t shake.   
“You guys were good, surprisingly.” He broke the silence. Wendy took that as the highest compliment coming from someone like him. “Thanks, you guys were too; I mean, I’ve never been to a death metal show before as I’m sure you probably realized while I was standing there like an idiot during your set.” 

“Yeah, I kinda gathered that either you actually liked our shit or wanted to fuck one of us.” Mary shrugged as the blush crept to Wendy’s cheeks like a wildfire. 

“You gathered correctly…I mean, that I liked the music.” She finally looked up. “It was incredibly unique, dark, and…just, well, I don’t know. It somehow felt different than everything else. I really enjoyed it and I’m going to my favorite record store tomorrow to delve into more.” 

“Oh yeah, which record store?” Mary cocked his head to the side as she finished up the bandage on his hand. “It’s a place called Archies.” Wendy replied. “No shit?” He grinned. “I go there all the time; at least once a week…I’m surprised I haven’t seen you there.” 

“I usually order whenever I need something and pick up on Sunday mornings…I’m not much of a people person on my days off.” 

“What do you do?” Mary asked. “I’m a therapist, mostly working with at-risk youth around the city; so as you could imagine, I cherish band practice and the weekends off in solitude.” 

“That explains the strange Suzie homemaker outfit at the front of the stage.” Mary chuckled to himself. “Ah, yes, I barely made it out of my last appointment before your show; so no time to change.” 

“It’s cool.” He shrugged again. “At least you’re dedicated…just, don’t stop, alright?” Mary’s gaze turned to her face, taking in her features at a closer distance. “You have talent and even if it isn’t death metal, it’s OK.” 

Mary sucked at compliments, like fucking sucked. But damnit when he tried, he tried. 

And that was how Mary met Wendy.


	4. Pumpkin Queen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After waking from their nap and sharing an awkward moment, Mary and Wendy take a trip to the grocery store to purchase more decorations. A new unsavory character is introduced, reminding Wendy of her own insecurities.

Mary had drifted off into a deep sleep, one hand on the small of Dee’s back and the other unknowingly on her ass. Dee, however, woke up an hour later from an extremely vivid dream of that same night. Except, it didn’t end in the alleyway, but rather in her bed…with Mary. They’d been friends for two long years, and he had even moved in with her a good six months ago. Dee and Mary were inseparable. Where there was one, the other wasn’t far behind. All of these things in mind didn’t help the growing tension in her belly every time he smiled or touched her. Dee had always found Mary to be attractive, but he was always unavailable in her mind. He seemed to always be bringing a different girl back to his place from a show every single night. For some reason though, he stopped that when he agreed to room with Dee. 

In fact, he had stopped a lot of things, but others he had not. He stopped falling asleep with makeup on, but left his clothes lying around for Dee to pick up. Mary always made sure there was fresh coffee when he woke up, but let the dishes pile up to infinity if left unattended. He was a mess in the shower, leaving every bottle of shampoo and body wash open, but always screwed the lid back on the toothpaste. It was strange behavior for Mary, but Dee ran with it. He didn’t respect many people, hell, not even himself sometimes, but he did care about Dee. 

Wendy smiled softly as she looked over at Mary’s sleeping face. He was resting well, his head turned towards the living room with his hair covering half of his face. 

“Candy corn is disgusting, Dee.” Mary mumbled in his sleep. “No way, man. I’m not eating that.” 

“Eating what?” Wendy grinned, curious if he would answer. “The cake, it looks great, but smells like candy corn.” Mary even managed to twist his lips in his sleep. “How about I make you peanut butter kisses then?” She smirked and Mary’s lips slowly moved upward into a small smile. “As long as you give me the kisses.” Wendy blushed crimson red and her heart fluttered as Mary’s hand moved from her ass to the back of her head, pulling her face closer to his.

Is he awake? She thought. Should I wake him? Surely he isn’t going to kiss me…right?

Wrong. 

Mary pulled her face close to his, close enough to ghost her lips with his warm breath. This could be it if she wanted, but it wasn’t fair. He was asleep and wouldn’t have really meant it. 

“Mary…” Dee spoke softly, and his lips twisted in disgusted again. “It’s time to wake up, Mare.” 

“Candy Corn.” He groaned as he loosened his grasp and opened his eyes. “Why are you in my face with that shit?” 

“Hey, you pulled me here.” Dee rolled her eyes into a small smirk. “Expecting something else, kisses perhaps?” Mary’s eyes grew wide realizing he had been talking in his sleep again. A trail of crimson blush threatened his cheeks. Damnit why couldn’t he have worn paint today? In the true Mary Goore fashion, he quickly calmed to an uncaring state. 

“That’s right, doll face, I was expecting some kisses.” Mary smirked. Dee could feel her heart fluttering again as she looked down at him, those piercing green eyes prodding the depths of her mind. Choosing to test the waters, Dee leaned down and kissed his cheek, much closer to the corner of his mouth than she had intended. 

“There,” She spoke softly before leaning further back to take in the sight of his soft gaze. “Now, I’ll make the rest in the kitchen after our trip to the grocery store.” 

“Black and orange wrappers too?” Mary brushed off this tense encounter with a small smile. “I mean cookies, dingus.” Dee laughed as she stood up. “Have you never eaten peanut butter kiss cookies before?” Mary shook his head, though his interest was now piqued. “But I’ll try ‘em.” 

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
“I don’t know why I couldn’t wear at least a little blood.” Mary grumbled as he and Dee walked down one of the many decoration aisles in a mega department store. “Because, Goore, you always get it in my car and I just had it detailed.” 

He just rolled his eyes and walked beside the cart, taking in the view of all the colorful decorations. He wasn’t one for material things, but he liked seeing Dee happy, and she was most happy during the fall months when she dragged out all the decorations for each month leading all the way from September to February. Mary had never experienced that before, celebrating each season and holiday like this. Sure, his mom would put up a few window decals and carve some pumpkins with him sometimes, but nothing like this. 

“Mary!” Dee squealed. “Look!” By this point Wendy had a candy corn colored feather boa around her shoulders while she held a Frankenstein head canister. “This is perfect for the pumpkin coffee pods!” 

Mary just looked at her a moment, taking in the sight of this beautiful strange woman. That day she wore an orange shirt with the words Pumpkin Queen in black, a light washed jean jacket, matching boyfriend jeans and white low-cut converse. That feather boa was the extra touch bringing the biggest grin to Mary’s face. 

“What?” Dee smiled. “You, my dear, are truly the pumpkin queen.” He chuckled as she walked over holding the canister carefully. “Well a queen cannot rule alone, so does that mean you’re the pumpkin king?” Mary thought his words over carefully while he watched her place the canister in the cart with care. 

“Do I get unlimited candy?” He asked. “Of course, kings and queens get everything they want all the time; including candy.” She grinned while placing a matching boa around his shoulders. “But they have to wear the boa.” Mary huffed and shook his head before taking over the duties of pushing the cart. 

“Mare?” Dee wrapped her arm around one of his. “Hm?” “Will you carve a lot of pumpkins with me this year; I know you hate the whole pumpkin guts thing, but I’ll scoop if you’ll carve.” 

How could he say no to that soft voice? He couldn’t, and that’s why he gave in so often; happily, of course. “Ugh, mix some fake blood in with the guts and I’ll do it.” Mary groaned dramatically. “Now, get the shit for those cookies you were talkin’ about earlier.” 

Dee grinned and gave his arm a quick squeeze before walking ahead, grabbing three bags of his favorite candy and a few decorations before directing him towards the baking aisle. “Uh, you better grab an extra bag or two.” Mary grinned sheepishly as she grabbed a package of Hershey kisses. “For the pumpkin king.” She giggled before grabbing two more bags along with some creamy peanut butter and a couple of baking odds and ends. 

“Onto the coffee, Mare Bear.” Dee tugged the cart only to receive a look of distain. “I hate when you call me that.” Mary grumbled. “Well…in public anyway.” 

“Excuse me…Mary.” Dee bit her lip as they carried on to the coffee aisle. 

Mary flipped through his phone while Wendy stocked up on regular and pumpkin flavored coffee after going on about it since July. He was pretty certain she was the only one who actually bought it, but she enjoyed it nonetheless. 

“Mary?” A voice called from behind him. “Hey, I thought that was you.” 

He snapped is body around to see a young woman walking towards him with a basket in hand. She was sort of pretty; blond hair, green eyes, thin, a little heavy on the makeup, but not too bad. She wore rugged and ripped pants similar to what Mary usually dawned, along with a well-loved band shirt of some sort. 

“Ana…hey,” Mary nodded nervously not realizing he still had the feather boa around his neck. “Getting a little festive early this year?” She giggled and nodded to it. “Oh, ha, this…eh, yeah.” He quickly pulled the boa away and laid it in the cart. “You know, it works for you.” She smirked. “We should hook up again soon and you could bring that along; it’s been what, like three months or somethin’?” 

Dee finally stood with an arm load of boxes and bags of coffee, a big smile on her face until she saw Ana and Mary within close proximity of each other. Dee’s expression quickly fell along with her heart to her stomach while she loudly dropped the boxes into the cart, ripping them from their conversation. 

“Oh, sorry we’ll get out of your way.” Ana smirked. “Oh, no that’s OK, we’re here..together.” Dee smiled in a fake manner as Mary looked over at her with thankful eyes. Ana’s own expression fell as she looked Wendy up and down, sizing her up the way Mary had the first time they met. 

“Well,” Ana smirked and flicked her gaze back to Mary. “explains why you don’t have your real face on…have fun with your vanilla cupcake then; if you get bored and need to get off properly, call me, babe.” 

Ana turned on her heels as Mary let out a deep sigh while screwing his eyes shut. Wendy wanted to run and hide, feeling utterly defeated as she ripped the boa off her shoulders, throwing it in the cart before walking ahead. By the time Mary opened his eyes she was gone, aimlessly wandering through the aisles trying to hold back her tears. She wasn’t stupid, Mary obviously had many partners, especially women. Though his love life, if that’s what you want to call it, had been quiet lately, at least in their apartment; it was still a stupid slap to the face when someone like Ana approached him while he was out with Dee. It hurt that people couldn’t possibly see him with someone like her. She’d been called a vanilla cupcake more times than she could count. Sure, that bothered her, but it really fucking bothered Dee when she was accused of curbing Mary’s personality. She loved the loud, rude, obnoxious Mary; but she also loved the terrible compliment, cuddly and sweet Mary. 

Ending up in the women’s clothing, Dee looked at a few dresses hanging close. Most everything was over the top basic bitch style, but a few things were nice. 

“This would look good on you.” Mary spoke from behind her holding a black bell sleeve sweater dress. Dee stayed silent, her back still turned to him as she looked at a vintage styled pumpkin sweater. “Dee,” Mary sighed. “She’s fuckin’ stupid…she doesn’t know what she’s talkin’ about…” 

Still she remained silent while grabbing a black velvet pleated mini skirt. “I think this will do.” Dee mumbled to herself. 

“Dee, please.” Mary threw the dress in the cart before abandoning it to walk behind her as she shopped. “just…stop, OK; I hate when…when you ignore me.” 

She could hear the sincerity in Mary’s voice as she stood in place. He was rarely ever this caring, but she chose not to question it. “I hate when people underestimate me and I fucking hate when I’m accused of making you water yourself down…I would never break your spirit; I like you just the way you are.” 

“If you don’t turn around right now…I am going to throw the biggest Mary Goore fit you’ve ever fuckin’ experienced.” He warned as he touched her shoulder, gently turning her around to be met with sad angry eyes. 

One hand on her shoulder, Mary used the other to lift her chin so she would looking right into his eyes. 

“Let them underestimate you, Dee; they don’t know you like I do. And why do you think I haven’t see her in months, she ain’t all that nice.” Mary stared directly into her eyes. “You haven’t broken my spirit, but you have helped me to be a little nicer and I kinda like it sometimes…but most importantly I want you to know that I like you just the way you are.” 

“I shouldn’t have made you come here with me.” Dee sighed as the tears threatened to fall. “And I shouldn’t have made you—” 

“I want to be here.” Mary thumbed away a falling tear. “The pumpkin king requests that you stop crying and accompany him to one of our favorite coffee joints for an obligatory Pumpkin Spice Latte, iced for you, of course.” 

Dee couldn’t help but to chuckle at that last part as he grabbed the skirt from her hands before pulling her back over to the cart. “Mm…this skirt is, uh…it’s ah…fuck it.” Mary grinned mischievously. “It’s fucking hot.” “Keep it in your pants, Goore.” Dee smirked. “Yes, ma’am.” He whined jokingly…or was he joking? 

After a long wait for check out they finally loaded the bags into the trunk and Mary took over driving them to the coffee shop. Dee felt sort of embarrassed by her little melt down, but Mary had seemed to have forgotten about it entirely as he ordered their drinks at the drive-thru with absolute ease. She had turned him onto the PSL, with extra whip for Mary, of course, the year before. 

“Fuck, I feel like a basic bitch.” Mary groaned pleasurably after his first sip of the venti he insisted he needed to power through decorating. “You are a basic bitch, Mare; been around me too long.” Dee smirked. “You’re anything but basic, Dee.” He shook his head. “You just have some basic tastes is all…we all do.” 

“Shall we take a drive?” Mary grinned as he turned the radio on. “We shall.” Dee agreed as Black Sabbath blared through the speakers. Though it was the beginning of October, it didn’t feel all that cool outside. It was the perfect weather to have the windows rolled down, at least for the day. They did this often, making coffee at home before taking a long drive. Singing along to whatever was on the radio, having deep conversations, or just sitting silently when it hurt too much to talk. Dee’s car had become a safe space for both of them, sharing the best and the worst, and weathering the storms together…


	5. Dinner and a Movie

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mary and Wendy share a nice meal and movie. Then the next morning they hit a little bump in the road of their friendship over angst and miscommunication. Things will only get worse before they can get better.

“Yeah, up there! That’s perfect!” Dee directed Mary in placing some orange and black garland on a high up shelf. “You are too easy to please.” Mary chuckled as he stepped down from the side table. “I just find happiness in the simple things, Mare, even cheap plastic two-dollar garland.” 

Wendy stood back; her arms folded as she looked around the room at the various decorations making the space look like something out of a magazine. The crème colored couch was now covered in a black and orange crochet blanket and multiple Halloween pillows, which most of them stayed out throughout the year anyhow. Two new candy dishes sat in the middle of the coffee table, one filled with candy corn and assortments, while the other strictly held peanut butter kisses. It felt like home, especially with the pumpkin scented candle by the window. 

“We did good, eh?” Mary grinned as he pulled an arm around Dee. “You like it?” 

“I do.” Dee smiled and nudged his side. “C’mon, I’ll make dinner and those cookies I promised you; it’s well deserved after all your work.” 

Settled into the kitchen, Mary sat on the counter beside the cutting board while Dee chopped some vegetables for a salad. “So, you workin’ tomorrow?” Mary asked. “Nope, long weekend for me, thankfully; Thursday to Monday.” 

“Alright, well, I think I might be workin’ tomorrow night, but I’m off Saturday and Sunday; we should practice or somethin’.” 

“Sure, yeah, that’s good.” Dee zeroed in on what she was doing. “You know, we really should start putting fillers out for a new guitarist since Jan is moving.” Mary sighed a heavy sigh. “We don’t need a new guitarist, Dee; you’re great.” 

“I’m good.” She nodded. “But it’s becoming more difficult to imagine doing both again, Mare.” Dee huffed. “I know you can, and you do so well; but the lyrics have become more intricate over the last two years and I’m so exhausted after a practice or a show now having to keep my mind on two equally difficult things.” Mary hated the idea of change, especially knowing they were losing Janice. Of course, they were both happy for her soon moving and marrying a guy she met; it was just difficult. 

“Just, let’s think about it, alright?” She made sure to look at him good this time before dumping the veggies in a large mixing bowl with beautiful fresh lettuce. “Yes, mother, we will think about it.” 

“Alright, then, Norman…set the table for us, dear.” Dee winked. “Alright, alright, I’ll give you that one.” Mary rolled his eyes before hopping off the counter while she tended to the main course and another side dish before moving onto mixing the ingredients for Mary’s cookies. 

“Table is set, living room is picked up and clothes have been moved to the hamper, what else?” Mary crossed his arms as he leaned against the wall. “You should have a venti more often if this is what happens.” Dee giggled. “Here, enjoy.” She placed some foil wrapped chocolate kisses on the counter. Mary half smiled at the little gesture before swiping the three candies and disappearing to the living room. He had been extra helpful lately and it was hard not to question, but again, Wendy tried to let it go. 

An hour later dinner was out of the oven and the cookies were dropped in. Wendy happily placed the herb chicken, roasted veggies and mashed potatoes on each plate before filling two bowls with salad. That was one thing exciting to her about Mary moving in, not just cooking for one and eating alone. A couple trips from the kitchen to the dining table on the other corner of the room and everything was set. 

“Mare! Dinner is ready!” Dee yelled as she quickly grabbed a bottle of water for her and a can of soda for him. “I’m feelin’ water tonight too.” Mary waltzed in. “Are you sick or something?” Dee jokingly swiped the back of her hand against his forehead checking for a fever. “Nah, just had a lot of sugar today, feelin’ a little jittery.” With that, Dee swapped soda for water and they sat down to eat. 

Dinner was mostly quiet since both of them were starving having only eaten breakfast and Halloween candy all day. However, between the espresso and his own feelings, Mary had a sense of anxiety and needed to speak just to hear something.

“So, we gonna watch somethin’ tonight?” Mary asked before taking a bite of chicken. “Sure, Monster Club was next one our list; my room this time?” Mouth still full, Mary just nodded. 

Dee and Mary had made a routine of watching a movie together every night, alternating between the other’s room each time. Sometimes they fell asleep, other times they would find their way to their own beds. It was never sexual, but they’d both be lying if they said they didn’t enjoy the unexpected cuddling it brought sometimes. 

\--------------------------------------

“You dressed?” Mary called out from the hallway. “Get in here, Goore.” Dee huffed and she flopped down on her bed dressed in an oversized t-shirt and black panties. 

Mary smiled entirely proud of himself for not spilling the plate of cookies and milk as he sat it on the bed. 

“What time do you go into work tomorrow?” Dee asked as they both slipped under the covers. “If I do, in at six and out at one.” Mary yawned and plucked a cookie from the plate for a bite. “Alright, so these taste nothing like the candy, but they’re pretty fuckin’ good.” 

Dee just grinned to herself and pressed play. “Some people might call you a vanilla cupcake, but your taste in films sure ain’t that way.” Mary chuckled halfway through the movie. “Wouldn’t have seen half these films without you, Dee.” “Yeah, well, you’re the only one who appreciates them.” She nudged his shoulder before sliding further down in bed. “Now move your arm.” She demanded before her head found the perfect spot on his chest, with his arm draped around Dee’s back. 

“Is this OK?” Dee yawned. “Yeah, but are you fallin’ asleep on me, baby doll?” Dee just huffed and rubbed her face further into the warmth of his bare chest before promptly falling asleep a couple of minutes later. 

“Dee?” “Mm?” She huffed. “I’m gonna go so you can sleep.” Wendy just held him tighter in protest. “Just stay.” She groaned; her eyes still closed in this dream state. Who was Mary to deny her when she protested so sweetly? 

Though his heart pounded a bit harder looking down at this adorable woman spread across his chest, he couldn’t deny her. Mary just didn’t know how much longer he could keep this up though. There was never a moment he didn’t let someone know what was on his mind if it bothered him enough, but he had been keeping his thoughts to himself with Dee. 

Why fuck up a good thing? All Mary ever did was fuck up good things…

The next morning Wendy woke up to Mary as the big spoon, holding her back flush against him while his arm was draped over her side. She smiled for a moment envisioning what it would be like every morning to wake up to this. Mary was comfy to her and she loved the nights when they didn’t make it to their respective beds. Sleeping alone was the worst and he made it better. Mary made a lot of things better whether he realized it or not. 

“Ugh…don’t go. Cold.” Mary squeezed her against him as Dee tried to get up to start the day. “It’s almost ten, Mare, it’s way past time for me to get up.” “But you don’t work today.” He complained. “No, but I still don’t want to sleep all day; besides, Janice is coming over soon.” She chuckled before slipping from his grasp with a dissatisfied grunt from him. “Sleep as long as you want, Mare.” With that he shoved his head under a pillow and laid his arms out flat, the covers tossed under his arms accentuating his shoulders. 

Still dressed in her oversized shirt and black panties, Dee shuffled into the kitchen in search of coffee and ingredients for pancakes. A soft folk/indie playlist humming from the phone dock, Dee got to mixing the dry ingredients first, flour, salt, sugar and baking powder. A few small sips of coffee and wiggling her hips to beat, she moved onto the wet ingredients last. Wendy took the dance like nobody is watching thing to the extreme most of the time, especially when Mary was asleep. Singing under her breath, full on swinging her hips, Wendy’s head lolled back just living in the moment. However, on a time limit before Janice made it, she got back to the rest of it and finished up before dropping generous dollops of the batter in a pan. 

“Dee!” Mary yelled as his feet pattered against the hard wood. “Dee! Where are you?!” 

“Kitchen, what’s wrong?” She furrowed her brows and turned around, instantly pulled from her easy morning and pancake watching. Mary had the biggest smile on his face as he stop in front of her, still wearing his black pajama pants. “Spatula down first.” Mary instructed. “…not only did we get Fred’s back, a record company exec. Is going to be there checking out the bands!” 

“Holy shit, Mare!” Wendy squealed as she jumped into his arms, her legs instantly wrapping around his waist as he held her ass for support. “This is it, babe!” Mary twirled Dee around in his arms before pulling her close again. Time stopped for a moment as she looked down at his beautiful green eyes again, instantly lost with no savior. “This is it…huh?” She spoke softly, her hands cupping his cheeks. “The chance we’ve waited for, for two fuckin’ years, babe; and you are gonna win the guy over no problem.” 

“We,” Wendy shook her head. “We are gonna win him over together; all for one, right?” Mary grinned and nodded. 

“Well shit the bed!” Janice yelled from the front door, startling Mary to almost drop Dee before she could shuffle to her feet. “It finally fuckin’ happened!” 

“What the fuck are you goin’ on with on, Jan?” Mary grumbled without even looking up before walking over to the counter to grab a cup of coffee after flipping the browning pancakes. “Morning to you too, asshole.” Janice grinned as she walked into the kitchen. 

“Well, what’s going on then?” Dee grinned and explained the deal with Fred’s before flipping some pancakes onto a plate only to start the process over again. “Alright, well, that was worth an ass grab.” She winked and nudged Mary who continued grumbling as he grabbed the plate and syrup before stomping off to the living room. 

“Mary!” Dee called out. “I promise I won’t get it on the fuckin’ carpet.” He snapped back. “Yeah, yeah.” Dee rolled her eyes before flipping another stack. 

While Mary sulked at the presence of Janice, who he was angry with for soon leaving the band, she and Dee sat across from each other on the counter, chomping down on breakfast, discussing Jan’s plans for moving in November. 

“You know, you’ll have to show the new guy the ropes.” Dee smirked. “Guy, huh; you already found someone?” Dee quickly shook her head. “Nah, I just got a feelin’, you know?” 

“And Mary, what does he think about this; not only me being replaced, but with a guy?” Janice lowered her voice to keep out of earshot. Dee just bit her lip and looked down at the empty plate for a moment. She knew Jan would sense right away if she was lying, but it was hard to tell her just how much of a loss they felt, especially when Jan was happy. 

“He’s pissed about you leaving. Says I can take over again since I used to do it anyway; but I haven’t really said anything about a guy.” She shrugged. “What would that matter anyway?” 

“Oh, come off it, Dee; you two…” Janice waggled her brows and hopped off the counter. “Us two, what?” Dee followed her. “Ugh, you know he would be jealous.” “Of what?” She snorted. “Mary is a great guitarist, there’s nothing to be jealous of; maybe they could be friends, share some male bonding shit.” 

Janice just rolled her eyes hard and walked past Dee to the living room where Mary was now banging out some acoustic tune which she instantly recognized while hearing him softly mutter the words. Though Mary rarely sang in a soft and eligible manner, Dee simply adored it. He had a beautiful voice and she tried to encourage him time and time again to take over singing some of the songs on their setlist, only to be met with intense protest. He didn’t like the spotlight on him and having his “real” voice being heard gave Mary anxiety. Still, setting his feeling aside for a moment, Mary indulged Dee as she and Janice sat on the couch to the left of him. 

“I cry I pray mon dieu…” Mary nodded towards Dee to back him up on the chorus, which she gladly did. 

It was almost disgustingly sweet how smitten she looked while holding his gaze. Janice was just short of gaging at this infectious sight. How could they not see that they were made for each other?! Mary had calmed down so much since he met Dee, and it was entirely for the better. He seemed to have a clear direction in life, striving to better himself and his career. Other people talked shit about how much he’d changed, but Janice was happy to see the twinkle in his eye. She used to be right along-side Mary during her hay day; she knew what it was like. But Janice was thankful for the man she had met who deepened her path in life and she wanted that for Mary too. 

“You two are so great together.” Janice grinned between their stares. “Seriously, you harmonize so well.” 

“Yeah, yeah, Jan.” Mary huffed before going off on his own little unfamiliar riff. “Mare?” Dee smiled hopeful. “Hm?” He still focused on thumbing through his little lick, his fingers moving effortlessly against the strings in a beautiful pattern. “Would you do ever do that…live…the full-on Ghost way?” 

Mary cringed as he looked up and stopped halfway through his ministration. “No fucking way, Dee.” He shook his head in distain. “You like that frilly wannabe metal band all you want; I’ll go to the shows when you make me, play it with you every now and then when we’re fuckin’ around at practice, but no fuckin’ way am I singing one of their covers.” 

Wendy’s expression fell as she looked down at the cooled coffee mug in her hands. She wished so badly to share the joy of Ghost with Mary, but he protested every mention of him having even a thimble of likeness to Papa vocally. Though he at least tolerated the idea of Alpha and Omega, citing that they at least had skill. 

“All you had to say was no.” Dee bit her lip and stood up, promptly walking down the hall to her room, the tears threatening to fall. “She on the fuckin’ rag or somethin’?” Mary grumbled. He always tried to act tough in front of Janice, even after she settled down. It was as if he still had something to prove; all the while even though Mary was irritated, he wanted nothing more than to wrap his arms around Wendy and apologize for being a totally insecure tool. 

“What the fuck is wrong with you, shit head?!” Janice spat with furrowed brows. “She was just trying to share something with you that is important to her and there you go fucking it all up.” 

“She knows how I feel about them, Jan.” Mary rolled his eyes. 

“Sure, but she didn’t know that she had to make you go to shows; she thought you actually wanted to go…just to be there with her as support. How many times has she gone to death metal concerts with you, or stood in the very front row of your shows getting tossed around, sometimes bruising ribs just to support your dreams and interests?” 

Mary sat back in his chair, quiet as a mouse as he let out a lengthy exhale. Fuck, he thought. Being an insecure irritable little shit wasn’t such a great look for him. 

“A lot…” He sighed again, his eyes momentarily flicking to Janice for a disapproving look. “That’s right, and she’ll keep doin’ it too; because that’s Wendy, the one person who has never let you down and never will.” Janice scolded him. “So what’s goin’ on, Mare?” 

Mary bit his lip and looked down at the fretboard of his guitar. It was pristine and perfectly clean as always. 

“I…I just hate it when someone compliments my voice.” He shifted nervously in his chair. “You’re such a girl, Goore.” Janice rolled her eyes. “Go fuckin apologize before you lose the best thing you’ve never had.” Mary glared at the last few words before sitting his guitar down. “Yeah, you fuckin’ heard me…and you better do somethin’ about that too, before I hook her up with one of Jack’s business friends.” 

Mary balled his fists and promptly snapped his body up from his chair, never giving Janice a second look as he stomped down the hall, his feet hitting softer than he would’ve liked. He hated the idea of seeing Wendy with anyone else, but who was he to stop her? He wouldn’t make the first move anyway. 

“Hey,” Mary knocked on the open door to see Dee fully dressed and primping in the full-length mirror hanging on her closet door. Dressed in a tight black turtleneck sweater, the black velvet skirt from before, black sheer tights and black heel boots…She look fucking…hot. 

“Hey.” Dee glanced at his reflection now behind her, before finishing the burgundy lipstick on her bottom lip. Mary’s eyes traveled all down her back side, acknowledging her existence of curves and attitude. “Wh-where are you goin’?” 

“Just out.” Dee shrugged as she turned around to face him, a look of distain equal his previous expression. “Maybe to the guitar shop, pick up some new strings and such.” 

“Oh, thought you and Jan were gonna practice or somethin’.” Mary rubbed the back of his neck nervously. “Or something.” She nodded. “I mean, I might call a late band practice later if the guys can make it.” 

“But I think I gotta work.” Dee smirked as she walked past him. “Don’t worry about it, Mare, it’s nothing you’d want to play anyway.” 

Mary’s mouth fell open unable to form a proper sentence. He had rubbed off on Wendy and it was very evident. His mind and heart racing, Mary took off after them. 

“Coffee and new guitar strings?” Dee questioned Jan as she placed her old acoustic in a case before grabbing her small black backpack while Mary lurked by the wall, a look of panic washing over him. “My treat, of course.” She smiled over to Jan. 

“Not sure when I’ll be back, so you got your set of keys?” Wendy looked back at Mary as she gripped the black handle of the guitar case. “Uh…yea, but…can we—can we talk?” 

“Eh, I’m not much in the talkin’ mood, Mare; later though?” Mary stepped forward as Jan stood up and opened the door. “But I think I gotta work, Dee—” 

“Tomorrow then, Mare.” She didn’t even look back to see his fallen expression, though Jan threw him a sad smile and a shrug before walking out behind her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry to not have updated as frequently lately as I originally did in the beginning. I wanted to have the rest of the story sorted before posting anymore. I believe I have a completely clear direction now and can only hope I do this justice. Thank you to everyone who has taken the time to check out even a chapter.


	6. Oddities

Wendy was much more cold than usual and tight lipped as she and Jan walked out to her car. The moment she turned the key in the ignition an early Sepultura song blared, but not for long as she quickly twisted the knob, shuffling channels to one playing ABBA. 

“Fucking death metal bullshit.” Dee grumbled while backing out of her spot. 

The ride was mainly silent with occasional humming from both ladies, though the tension lingered, and Janice hated it. She didn’t like seeing Wendy worked up and rarely ever witnessed her angry. “You know what, we should go to the new oddities shop before everything else.” Janice attempted to break the tension. “Maybe we can summon a guitarist from beyond the grave to take my place.” Dee just snorted and shook her head. “Yeah, yeah, sure, let’s do that Jan.” 

Janice grinned entirely proud of herself for extracting a sarcastic laugh from Wendy. She had been genuinely curious about the new shop, but her fiancé wasn’t really one for oddities, though Dee was always into the macabre and strange. She was really the only girlfriend from Janice’s recent past who enjoyed it. All the wives from Jack’s new firm were normies lacking in experience with the strange and unusual. 

“So this is it?” Dee looked to Jan as they stood in front of a black framed storefront. Various scientific spectacles sat preserved in jars on display, while Victorian books and medical instruments were placed just so in cases. “Looks like Mary’s kind of place.” She added before grumbling to herself again. 

“And your kind of place too.” Janice smiled. “C’mon, let’s see if we can find something cool for the new house.” 

She pulled Dee through the door and they were instantly hit with the beautiful scent of Frankincense, but also a musky hint of old books. The floor was a beautiful black cherry gloss, while the walls were neutral crème, where one could actually see an empty space anyhow. Dee noticed how it was a cluttered but controlled mess, with not one bare table or shelf. They both gawked at the bizarre little creatures lurking in some of the glasses, still and lifeless in preservation of what they once were. It was beautiful in a macabre sense that something could last even after death for a little longer. 

Dee didn’t want to be preserved though and had told Mary that many times before, even though he insisted in his own morbid fascination how beautiful a properly preserved corpse looks. So, as a compromise, though Mary insisted she would outlive him, Dee agreed she would have a wake and then her body would be cremated, and ashes spread somewhere in a forest. 

“This is it; this is what you want and I’m buying it for you as my housewarming gift.” Wendy grinned as she pointed to a long glass case of three beautifully preserved Death’s-head hawkmoth’s and various crème and yellow pressed flowers. “This is beautiful, Dee and I think Jack will actually like it.” Jan smiled. “Thank you.” 

“Finding everything OK, ladies?” The voice of an elderly man loomed behind, startling both of them from their conversation. “I’m sorry if I startled you.” He chuckled as they turned around to be faced with a short old man, kind eyes behind rounded glasses, brown hair with a hint of salt and pepper and mustache, contrasting his black attire. 

“My name is Andre, I am the owner of this fine establishment, it’s nice to meet you.” He held out his hand. 

“Janice,” She smiled and shook his head. “This is my friend Wendy.” 

Wendy smiled at his kind green eyes as he switched from Janice to Dee for a good firm handshake. “It’s nice to meet you, Andre…you have a beautiful shop.” 

“Thank you, I’m glad you ladies are enjoying it. We just opened a month ago, so things are a little slow going as one would expect.” 

“I’m sure it will pick up, Andre; everything is so elegant and clean; in fact, I would like to purchase this display if that is possible.” Wendy pointed to the moths. Andres face instantly lit up as he grabbed the glass carefully. “Yes, yes, of course; is this a gift of some sort?” He asked. “I will gladly wrap it up for you.” 

“In fact it is.” She smiled. “A housewarming gift for Janice.” 

“Well congratulations!” He chirped. “I’ll take this up to the front while you two look around. If you need anything, please just let me know.” 

Just as Andre was about the turn on his heels, Janice asked the silly question. 

“Actually, Andre, do you have any Ouija boards?” Her inquiry stopped him dead in his tracks. “Oh, um, I-I do…but, dear, might I suggest a beautiful Victorian medical book as a coffee table piece instead, I mean, if an accent piece is what you’re after?” Andre stuttered nervously over his words. 

“Oh no, I want a Ouija board, but that sounds like a lovely addition also.” Janice grinned. “Well, ma’am, have you ever used one before to communicate; I tend to only sell them to those well versed in the arts.” 

“Trust me, Andre, I know my way around a board.” She insisted before pulling Wendy to follow Andre to the other end of the storeroom. In an open booth behind a red velvet rope sat a matching Victorian sofa surrounded by dark cherry shelves carefully displaying various Ouija boards from years passed; some faded, some different colors and fonts all together. Each one holding a different power and purpose. 

“Well, if you are as versed as your seem, please enter and have a look.” Andre shifted his weight on his feet as he held the rope back from the two of them. “Just, please, do not touch them unless you wish to claim them. Though they have all been blessed and cleansed of their essence, they still carry a power within them for those who know how to wield it…and sometimes even those who don’t.” 

Dee suddenly felt nervous as she turned a full circle looking around this small corner space before her eyes landed on a lone board. Naturally it was black but with elegant white script writing. That wasn’t the peculiar part, no, the planchet caught her eye, a beautiful white planchet with a Grucifix symbol carved in the middle. 

Andrea had long since disappeared as she gravitated towards this board, her heart pounded with the reach of her fingertips. “It’s calling to you, isn’t it?” Janice broke her intense concentration and Dee quickly retracted her fingers before ever touching the planchet. “N-no…this is all silly Halloween tomfoolery anyhow.” Dee huffed and rolled her eyes. 

“Well, if it’s such tomfoolery, then you shouldn’t be afraid to touch it.” Jan smirked and folded her arms over her chest. “Andre asked us not to touch anything if we don’t want it.” 

“Scaredy Cat.” Jan giggled as a small smirk graced her thin lips. “Really Jan, name calling?” Dee let out a similar huff again. “Yup; if you don’t believe in it, just fuckin’ touch it; be a rebel for once.” 

Feeling feisty already, Wendy reach out again, watching her fingertips until they met the white piece. Though it had initially looked plastic against the light, it was in fact marble. It was cold and slick against the pads of her fingertips as she glided the piece quietly across the board spelling nothing in particular. 

“Calling out to the past kickass guitarists before us, we request that you bring Wendy and her band an equally cool guy to take my place.” Janice quietly giggled as she placed her hands on the planchet. “Since this seems to be a Ghost board, if you could choose any Ghoul, who would you choose?” 

Wendy swallowed hard as she guided the planchet across the board again spelling out O-M-E-G-A. “Omega.” She breathed with a small grin before pulling her fingertips away. “I could never be so lucky to get someone of his level to replace what will be sorely missed.” 

“You just want him because you think he’s hot!” Janice nudged her side as they walked towards the velvet rope having satisfied her spooky curiosity. Dee just blushed and bit the inside of her lip. “He could be fuckin’ hideous under that mask, you know?” 

“He has the most beautiful blue eyes; there’s no way those eyes could belong to an ugly person.” Wendy defended. “Besides, I kind of like not knowing, it’s thrilling watching them onstage; though I noticed he wasn’t at the last show we went to…” Dee trailed off with a sad expression. 

“Find everything OK, ladies?” Andre smiled as he rang up the moth display. “But no Ouija board?”

“Just fine.” Janice nodded. “Ah, not this time, but I have my eye on one that I may be returning to purchase once I’m settled in.” 

Pleasantries were quickly exchanged along with money, and the ladies made their way to the coffee shop a block down. “Mm…a s’mores cappuccino with some extra drizzle sounds amazing about right now.” Janice grinned as she pushed the glass door open to a bustling café flooded with busy patrons on a quick break from respective businesses. However, it wasn’t the place filled with people that threw Dee off as she scanned the room, no, it was the music quietly humming through the air. 

“Jan…” She tugged on her arm grabbing her attention as they stepped forward in the line. “What?” “Don’t you hear it?” Dee looked with wide eyes as a song from Ghost sounded over the speakers. Janice just giggled and shook her head. “It’s just a coincidence, lighten up, Dee; besides, thought you didn’t believe in shit like that anyway?” 

Dee thought about it a moment and laughed to herself. Of course it was just a coincidence. Though it was rare for Ghost to get airtime, it wasn’t impossible. Dee just brushed it off and enjoyed this rare occasion that she could hear them. In fact, hearing them lifted her mood considerably, though she still kept Mary’s words in the back of her mind. It wasn’t personal, she knew this; however, it didn’t make it hurt any less. 

“Actually, you know what, double my order if you don’t mind.” Dee looked down at her wallet as the barista read her order back. “Two mocha mint lattes with extra whip and chocolate shavings, and two chicken avocado panini’s.” 

Wendy could feel Jan’s eyes burning a hole through her as she paid for her order. She knew who that extra order was for and she couldn’t help but to soften at this weakness Wendy had for Mary. It worried Jan though; Mary was bad sometimes about taking advantage of weakness and using it to his will, even with his friends. 

“Thought you were too mad to talk.” Jan quipped as they grabbed their order and walked out the door, the song having ended long ago. “I am…well, I was.” Wendy huffed. “He just has this way of getting into my head, Jan. He’s my best friend and friends can’t stay mad forever.” 

“Just your friend?” She arched her brow as Wendy unlocked the car. “Yes, Jan, just my friend…I’m not his type.” 

“Sure, you used to not be his type, but Mary has changed…a lot.” Jan reminded her. “Trust me, he doesn’t want me. We’ve lived together for a good while and nothing has ever happened.” 

Just as Dee turned the key in the ignition Ghost was playing again! Wendy snapped her gaze to Jan who was equally curious for a moment. “Alright, alright…it’s weird.” She shrugged. “But a coincidence, still, Dee. To not believe in it, you sure are freaked.” 

Dee tried to brush it off, only thankful that it silenced the conversation about her and Mary. 

“I’m sure breakfast has worn off by now.” Dee smirked as they stood outside the door. “He’d starve without me if I didn’t make him eat like a normal person.” She and Jan both laughed for a moment until they could hear a muffled angry voice on the other side…


	7. Bye, Cupcake

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> *Brief mention of blood and knife play. Nothing too detailed.

_“Seriously?! You are fuckin’ pathetic, Goore! I can’t even believe I answered when you called!”_ The female voice yelled. “I changed my fuckin’ mind, alright! Are guys not allowed to change their minds too?!” Mary spat back. _“No! Not when it’s a pussy lined in fuckin’ gold! I am grade A, baby. But you’re so fuckin’ whipped by that cupcake that you don’t know a good one when it’s offered to you!”_

Wendy knew instantly who was on the other side of the door. Her blood began to boil with each insult that Mary tried to brush off. The red practically flashes in her eyes as Jan grabbed the drink carrier and take out bag from Dee’s hands. She watched Dee take a slow deep breath, nervous about the moments ahead. Jan had heard people call Wendy cupcake a million times over since she had become friends with Mary. They all seemed to underestimate her and assumed she was truly just a rich bitch wannabe. However, those lyrics she wrote, they didn’t form out of thin air. There was a darkness dwelling inside Wendy that not even Mary had the proper chance to witness. 

Without a word Wendy twisted the knob and pushed her way inside on a mission to shut that bitch up one and for all. 

“Caught red fuckin’ handed!” Wendy gasped dramatically as she walked confidently over to Mary who was sitting forward on the couch while that bitch was standing across from the coffee table. “Naughty boy…I leave you alone for a few minutes…” She paused a moment to plop down on his lap, knocking the breath out of him with an ‘ _oof_ ’ as she straddled his hips. “and you bring home a feral stray!” 

Mary blinked as his eyes widened. “Let me have this moment, alright?” Wendy leaned into his ear quietly. A small confused smile tugged at his lips. 

“And just what should we do with you, hm?” She squeezed his cheeks between her fingers roughly causing his lips to pucker as she lifted his head up. “Perhaps the knife again; I do like to mark you up, let everyone know that _You. Are. Mine_ …but, it got a little dicey last time, huh?” 

Mary nodded with fake fearful eyes. “Mmmhm.” 

“Use your words Mary.” Wendy squeezed harder shaking his head a little as a dark giggle escaped her lips. “Y-yes, ma’am.” He faltered with his breathing more ragged than before. 

“Um what the actual fuck; fucking knife play?!” Ana finally spoke, pulling Wendy and Mary from this intense gaze. “Oh, you’re still here.” Wendy turned her head to look at her while Jan made herself scares in the kitchen caught somewhere between shock and utter amusement. 

“Uh, yeah, still here.” She rolled her eyes. “Well if you would like to join us, I suppose we can arrange that; but I have to warn you, if blood makes you queasy, you might want to sit this one out.” Wendy spoke in a condescending manner. 

Ana stood there dumbfounded, her mouth gaping open. 

“Everything prepared, Jan?” Wendy looked towards the kitchen. 

“Yes, ma’am.” Jan grinned as she appeared with a small leather bag and a bottle of alcohol in hand. “I’m fuckin’ out of here; freaks, all of you!” She yelled as she made her way towards out the door. “Bye cupcake!” Wendy yelled as the door slammed. 

Both Jan and Wendy burst into a fit of laughter, Wendy practically doubling over on Mary in hysteria. 

“Man you got her good!” Jan stepped over to high five her. “Fuckin’ right I did; tail tucked between her legs, see if she calls me a cupcake again.” 

Mary just looked with that same wide-eyed expression waiting for some sort of explanation from Wendy for this outburst. 

“Oh, shit, right.” Wendy met his gaze. “Where the fuck did that come from, Dee?” 

She grinned wickedly and slipped off his lap, the darkness still in her step. Wendy had never felt so proud of herself for finally sticking it to someone after more than two years of abuse. 

“Came from the same place you called that bitch.” She barked before brushing him off again, the adrenaline pumping through her body as she walked to the kitchen. Wendy felt so many things all at once, including a deeper sense of betrayal she never expected. But no matter how much she had to say, she just couldn’t be cruel even when Mary truly deserved it.

Mary looked bewildered as Jan caught his gaze. 

“Wh-what was that?” He muttered. “Your guess is as good as mine, Mare…but you better making it fucking right and do it quick.” 

Mary caught his breath as Jan walked into the kitchen after Wendy to console her. Though Wendy didn’t need anyone’s kindness, still hyped up and ready to fight or fuck. 

“Hey…you good?” Jan looked at her standing by the sink sipping her coffee. “Let’s go out tonight.” Wendy grinned, entirely dismissing her question. “Let’s go out tonight and you can be my wingman. I think I need a good lay.” 

Jan cocked her head to the side and arched her brow utterly taken back by her friends new attitude. 

“Who are you and where did my friend go?” She crossed her arms. “I swear, Dee, you sound more like Mary than Mary.” 

Wendy rolled her eyes at the comparison but continued the conversation. “Two years, Jan, two fucking years since I’ve gone on a date or…done anything else for that matter.” 

Before she could even finish the conversation Davis called Jan. It was a Friday at four in the evening, there were only so many reasons he’d call at such a strange time, and Jan could only speculate. 

“Davis, hey, how ya doin’?” 

“Good, good. How’s my girl been; getting all those wedding plans together, I’m sure.” He chuckled. 

“Ah, yeah, plugging right along.” Jan smirked. “Not that I don’t enjoy your calls, but is everything alright, Davis; I can only assume why you’d call so late on a Friday.” 

“And you’re probably speculating right, darlin’.” Davis huffed into another laugh. “Tonight’s band cancelled about twenty minutes ago…I know it’s short notice, and Mary is tending bar tonight, but you think you guys would want to take the slot and handle it without him like the first time I saw you? I’ll pay good; double, even, drinks included as always.” 

Wendy having been listening in the entire call grinned and nodded incessantly. 

“Please, please, please.” She whispered and nudged Jan. “It’s a sign, Jan, a big sign to have fun tonight.” 

“Fine.” Wendy huffed. “I’ll call the guys and see if they can make it; what time is load in?” 

“Darlin’ you have saved the night!” Davis said with glee. “Load in is no later than 5:00, but you can come before if you want and have a drink or something.” 

“Alright, Dave, sounds good. If the guys agree, we’ll see you around then.” 

Pleasantries were exchanged and the phone call ended with Wendy squealing like a schoolgirl. 

“What’s all the commotion about?” Mary walked in trying to play it cool as he grabbed his drink from the cardboard carrier. “We have a show tonight!” Wendy grinned, looking past her own feelings for just a moment. “But I have to work for Davis tonight.” He furrowed his brows. 

“Well, like you told me before, Mare, I can handle it; I can take back over for tonight. I did it before, I can do it again.” She smirked and folded her arms, only still clutching her lukewarm latte. 

“But…we, we’ve never not done a show together since I joined.” His voice faltered a bit. Jan almost felt bad for him for a moment. “Relax, you’ll be there to bear witness; Davis’ band for the night cancelled and he asked us to fill in. He made it clear that you have to work though, so…” 

Mary pinched the bridge of his nose and looked down at the table for a moment. How could all of this be happening? It felt like a horrible nightmare he couldn’t wake himself from. Did he really deserve this kind of punishment though? Not allowing him to play was as bad as ignoring him. It broke Mary to not do what he loved, or to not be acknowledged by a person he… 

They were all for one and one for all when it came to band decisions, and though everything in him screamed no, he bit the inside of his lip and lifted his face to nod. Mary might have felt a wreck on the inside, but he wasn’t going to stand in the way of Wendy and his bandmates doing a gig just because he couldn’t. 

“Well, if you feel overwhelmed or restless, I’m sure I can weasel my way out of work.” Mary added. “But I _know_ you can handle it, Dee, hands down.” 

He spoke honestly no matter how much it hurt to feel not only left out; but cut out all-together. Meanwhile, Dee could feel herself coming down from this high. She realized just how much she had overreacted and wanted nothing more than to beg Mary to get out of his shift to play with them. However, no matter how many times she wanted to open her mouth to speak, the words never flowed from her lips. She simply excused herself to prepare for the show. 

“She’s never going to forgive me, Jan.” Mary shook his head and continued to groan at the cardboard cup in his hands. “I fucked up in the biggest way.” 

“I’m not going to say she isn’t pissed, because she is.” Jan huffed. “Who was that anyway, I didn’t recognize her.” 

“No one.” Mary groaned at his dumbass mistake. “She’s someone I hooked up with a couple of times. Wendy and I were at the supermarket the other day and she came up to me. Hadn’t seen the girl in months and for good reason, she’s a bitch in the worst way. Anyway, she had some nasty shit to say about Dee; the kind of abuse she’s suffered in our scene for a while, but worse...” 

“How much worse?” Jan leaned in. “A lot worse. She blamed Dee for my taming it down; accused her of not being _enough_ for me. Said if I wanted a good lay to give her a call.” 

“Son of a bitch.” Jan rolled her eyes. “You are a fucking idiot, Mary; this was low, even for you. Dee is your best friend and you bring an enemy into her home. How would you expect her to act after all of that, Mare?” 

“I know.” Mary’s vision blurred as he rubbed the back of his neck. “I was so mad…wouldn’t let me apologize for earlier. It was so stupid and if I had it to do over, I would’ve just stuck it out. I…I don’t know how to fix this, Jan.”

“Just, damnit—” Jan huffed again. “Just get ready for your shift and I’ll talk to her tonight, alright?” 

Mary tried to muster a smile as he stood up and excused himself to his room. He strolled slowly past Wendy’s closed door hoping to hear just a faint sound of her speaking, singing, anything…however, all he heard was silence. He twisted his lips at the potential that this silence would become permanent. 

Meanwhile, Dee was standing in front of a full length mirror, dressed in a black crop tank with the words ‘Hail Satan, Carve Pumpkins’ in white and orange, black leather skinny jeans and matching boots. Her stomach felt sour and her hands trembled as she ran her fingers over the flat silver skull pendant hanging delicately around her neck. It was a birthday gift from Mary the first year of friendship. Little did she know, Mary’s stomach felt just as sour with regret.

However, Dee took a deep breath and thought back over the last two days in the supermarket, and now in her own home. The fire fueled in her belly again as her heart ached. Pulled in two different directions while being backed into an emotional corner, Wendy quickly left her room before her thoughts could consume her.


	8. Talk To Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The show must go on even with the current riff between Mary and Wendy...it's not how the show begins, but how it ends, that matters.

“You think maybe you should go a little easier on Mare?” Jan asked as she and Wendy started on their way to Davis’. 

“How so?” Wendy huffed a laugh. “I think I’ve been pretty tame; not like it matters anyway, all is good. I just want to go have fun tonight.” 

“You’re icing him out, Dee; that’s hardly all good.” 

“I just don’t have anything to say.” She shrugged. They both knew that was a lie. “Look, just, try to go easy on him, alright; he knows that he fucked up in the worst way and he really is sorry.”

Wendy nodded and turned the radio on. Nothing more was said, though Jan had so much she could say. Wendy was not her normal self and it didn’t take a stranger to recognize this. Two years of refrain and she had finally hit her break, realizing for the final time that Mary didn’t want her, even if he refused Ana, it was still principle. 

Wendy shook her thoughts away as she nodded to the beat of whatever song graced their ears. 

Soon they arrived at the back alley where the guys were already loading in. Mary had yet to make it, though he was only moments behind them, opting to drive himself; he claimed in case Davis kept him over. It was obvious though that he and Wendy couldn’t exist in a closed space at this point. 

“Well, since we didn’t get a practice in before tomorrow’s show, I guess this will do.” Adam smirked as Dee and Jan stepped out of her car and popped the trunk. “What better way to practice than in front of a crowd.” Dee chuckled. “We’ll be fine, even without Mary this go.” 

“No Mary?” Adam furrowed his brows as he grabbed their guitar cases. “He’s got to work, but I’m filling in.” 

“You sure you’re good to though, Dee; it’s been a long fucking time since you’ve played live.” He pointed out. “Maybe so, but there’s no choice at this point.” She shrugged. “She’ll be fine.” Jan leaned in and squeezed Dee’s shoulders from the side. 

Though she wasn’t entirely confident in her abilities, Wendy believed there was no turning back at that point. She had something to prove; what she had to prove and who she had to prove it to, had yet to become clear. It didn’t matter, she needed to do this. 

“Ah, the ladies of the hour!” Davis grinned as Wendy and Jan lugged their guitar cases in with Mary rushing past them to the back, not even giving Wendy a passing glance. “Drinks all around?” 

“The usual.” Jan smirked. 

“And you, Wendy?” Davis looked over at her spaced out expression. “Huh?” Dee snapped her body around to look at them. “What will you be having?” 

“Oh, um, the usual.” She nodded before laying her guitar case on the stage to pop the metal tabs open. 

Again, Mary walked back in with more gear, casually skating past Wendy, not even batting an eye. For the first time ever in their friendship, Mary was angry and hurt by Wendy, feeling she had gone just too far after his roundabout apology. It broke her spirit, but she was too hardheaded to let it show, especially now. She couldn’t admit defeat, not to Mary. Not like this… 

The soundcheck felt slow and painful while Mary stood behind the bar, casually glancing as he cleaned a few whiskey glasses. He wanted nothing more than to be on that stage next to Wendy, supporting her. He wanted nothing more than to be past this stupid day and be over their little moment. 

Neither of them had time to consider apologies as people flooded the bar, Wendy and the gang having left the stage just a few moments before. 

“You sure you’re good?” Jan asked as Davis brought them a new round of drinks. A fire burned in Dee’s belly as she looked over to see Mary leaned against the bar, talking to some beautiful patron. “Y-yeah, I’m fine.” She brushed Jan’s questioning off, feeling even more defeated. 

“Alright, you’re on!” The stagehand announced backstage, causing a wave of regret and confidence to mingle in Wendy’s chest before she downed a shot of whisky. 

“Fuck it, let’s fuckin’ do this.” Wendy jumped up and down a few times before leading her band onstage. 

The crowd erupted in excessive applause while Wendy pulled her guitar strap around her back, the sound of all these voices hyping her up just enough to push Mary to the back of her mind. In fact, she didn’t even have a chance to glance over at the bar as she kicked off the first song, everything beginning in perfection. Even Mary couldn’t deny the great start as he glued his eyes to Wendy through the first song. She had never seemed so in her element since they began playing together. In all honesty, seeing her like this made Mary wonder if he had been holding her back or underestimating her all this time. Still hurt, his mind had gone into ridiculous questioning and deep down he knew it was silly; but it still didn’t keep him from thinking about it. 

As Mary expected with his presence behind the bar instead, someone caught Wendy’s gaze. Tall and perfectly thick, short blond hair and piercing blue eyes. Mary just got the feeling that he too was a musician which didn’t help his jealous feelings as the guy took a seat at the bar right across from him. 

“Who the hell is that, woman?” The mystery man asked, catching Mary by surprise with his unusual accent. “Trust me, man, you ain’t got a chance.” Mary smirked. “Where you from anyway; obviously not from around here?” The man smirked and shook his head before taking a sip of his whisky. “Nowhere important.” 

Mary already didn’t like him and decided to make it his mission to sabotage anything he might try; but before he could speak further, the man got up and began wading his way through the crowd with the hopes of captivating Wendy. 

This little exchange didn’t go unnoticed by her either, or the disapproving glare from Mary only intrigued her further. The guy was pretty fucking hot. He wasn’t Mary hot by a long shot, no one was, but in his own way. His eyes were confident but calm as he waded his way to the front barrier at Wendy’s feet, planting his gaze right on her. She almost grinned at that little smirk gracing his lips as he winked. 

Since Mary had joined the band it wasn’t often that Wendy got as much attention. The crowd had become mostly Mary’s own little fan club. Both men and women fighting for the perfect spot right in front to the left of the stage. Though some familiar faces seemed a little disappointed to not see his bloody face next to Wendy, the interest began to shift more to her, especially from this mystery man. 

A quick glance back at Mary who seemed to be more engrossed than before, Wendy decided to put on a little show, but she wasn’t so sure who she was putting on for anymore. She just went with it and hoped for the best while performing one of their more sultry covers they had worked on a long while back. 

Mary could feel his blood boiling as she eyed this mystery man down with an intensity she had never shown before. He would have been lying to himself if he said he didn’t want to be in that guys place, at least for a minute, to enjoy this new side of Wendy. He had always known there was a confidence lurking deep within, but she would never really show it. However, the guttural notices coming from her throat hit Mary in a way he never expected, and he was hanging on her every move as she continued her efforts to impress this guy. 

Mary felt like he was in some strange daze as the show ended not long after this cover, and the DJ took over with some metal and rock tunes while the crowd dispersed enough to navigate the floor comfortably. The mystery man confidently approached the bar again, taking a seat at the end in hopes that Wendy would find him…and she would. Pumped full of adrenaline and the emotional trials of the day, Wendy had her sights set on this man and quickly hurried from backstage to find him. Her eyes scanned the crowd for his face, soon landing on him sitting at the bar, sipping another whiskey. One deep breath, Wendy put an attractive smile on her face and walked towards him. 

“Enjoy the show?” She leaned against the island as he looked up, a confident expression on his lips. “I did, very much.” 

Wendy mirrored his grin and nodded with ease, though she was more than nervous on the inside. She didn’t pick guys up at bars, hell, she didn’t pick them up at all. “Care to join me for a drink?” 

“Sure.” She smiled and sat down on the open bar stool beside him just as Mary was walking over to take large bridal parties order for shots. He and Wendy exchanged quick glances as he scribbled down their drunken order before disappearing to the back to grab a few bottles of liquor. 

She could feel the blush creep up on her cheeks when he reappeared and stacked out some shot glasses on a platter before filling each one with tequila. A few wedges of lime and a shaker of salt tossed in the middle, one of the girls gladly took it and disappeared to her table. 

“Usual?” Mary walked over nonchalant and never even gave the guy a nod. “Uh, yeah, cranberry—” 

“I got you.” Mary held up his hands. He was so short with her and she wasn’t sure if it was the massive crowd or their stupid fight before. Either way, she didn’t like it. It felt like she didn’t even know Mary anymore, but maybe in passing. It hurt. 

“I never did catch your name.” The man spoke, pulling Wendy from her thoughts. “Wendy.” She managed a smile as he held out his large hand. “Oliver.” 

She noted just how warm and soft his hand felt against her cold dainty one. “It’s nice to meet you, Wendy…you definitely know your way around a guitar.” 

Wendy blushed and looked down at the black counter as their hands fell away. It felt so peculiar but intriguing to be complimented by a stranger who seemed to actually mean it. 

“Thank you; I’m not usually the one playing, but our rhythm couldn’t make it tonight and the show had to go on, so.” 

“I would have never known the different.” He grinned again. “I’m not usually this straight-forward when meeting someone, but…you’re really beautiful.” 

“I’m a mess.” She scoffed. “No, I mean it; you are really attractive, Wendy.” 

She liked the way he said her name and couldn’t help but to meet his gaze. It felt as if his blue orbs could consume her soul for a moment. Though kind, they seemed so intense and bewitching. 

“So, do you play anything?” Wendy asked as Mary walked her drink over. “Need anything else?” 

“No, this is fine…” She bit her lip and took the glass in hand. Unimpressed with this asshole, Mary rolled his eyes as he walked away, though it didn’t go unnoticed by Wendy who began to feel a little pissed off. 

“I do, guitar, but I’ve taken a little hiatus from my band, just a breather to travel and explore other creative outlets.” 

He was attractive, well-spoken and also played guitar. It’s as if the universe sent him straight to Wendy to help her forget the last two wasted years all in one night. Drink after drink, she and Oliver were laughing like idiots and fawning over each other almost to an embarrassing degree. 

“I gotta go out and grab a smoke, cover for me?” Mary looked from this disgusting display back to the second bartender who obliged after surviving a crazy rush. 

Scowling and shooting death stares in Wendy and Oliver’s direction, Mary walked through the back to the alley and stood in the same spot he had two years before. How did he end up back here, alone and angry, feeling as if the world around him would come crashing down at any moment? How could he be so stubborn that he hurt those he cared for most? How could he be so imperfect and unworthy? He always seemed to manage to drive away the best people while destroying more of himself in the process, it never failed. 

_“FUCK!!!!” _A guttural scream ripped through his throat as he kicked the dumpster beside him. After some heavy breaths he finished his cigarette and ripped the back door open again, ready to finish out through closing. A feral fire began to build in his belly, hate coursing through his veins while the nicotine rushed to his brain. He felt like Mary again for the first time in a long time, but all of that quickly faded when he approached the bar only to see new people inhabiting the bar stools that Wendy and Oliver sat on previously. Panic began to build as he looked around the whole place realizing neither of them were anywhere in sight.__

__“Did you see where Wendy went?” He rushed over to Jan after spotting her at a table with Davis and a few friends. “Oh, yeah, she left with some guy; tall, blonde, pretty cute…”_ _

__“Did she say where she was going?” Mary looked with pleading eyes. “Home.” Jan could see the sheer panic in his eyes as his breathing hitched. He looked as if someone had knocked the breath right out of his body, his gaze now focused on the floor._ _

__“I…I have to go, I have to—” Jan wasn’t the only to see this change in Mary. “It’s only an hour till close, you can turn in early since things have calmed down.” Davis encouraged him. “Thanks.” Mary nodded almost absentmindedly as he fished the keys from his pocket._ _

__Jan didn’t even get to speak as Mary’s feet began to carry him through the crowd. His heart pounded in his ears as he reached his car in the back lot. It all felt like a terrible dream, a nightmare, and he couldn’t wake. Wendy didn’t even know this guy. What if he was a serial killer? What if he was some guy who hunted down chicks at bars? So many scenarios ran through his mind as he said fuck all to the speed limit and made it home in record time._ _

__His hands shook as he shoved the key in the door at the thought of what might be on the other side. No matter how much he tried to prepare himself, there was nothing he could do to ready his heart. Twisting the knob he braced for the worst and pushed the door open._ _

__There on the couch was Wendy straddling the guys lap, locked in an intense lip lock. Mary wanted to rip him a part as his heart sank to his feet. However, rather than rip him apart, Mary decided to play a little game of cock block and made sure to drop his keys heavily in the pumpkin dish by the door. Wendy was just short of jumping off Oliver’s lap as she pulled back and snapped her gaze to the door. Her eyes grew wide, her breath frantic as a bout of panic washed over her._ _

__“Oh, don’t mind me, baby doll, just got off early.” Mary smirked and disappeared to the kitchen to make himself a drink._ _

__“Isn’t that the fucking guy from the bar?” Oliver asked as she slipped off his lap to sit beside him. “You didn’t tell me you had a boyfriend—”_ _

__“I don’t.” Wendy said through gritted teeth as Mary walked back in and plopped down on the recliner before turning the TV on._ _

__“Oh,” He looked back at them with a small smirk on his lips. “Don’t stop on my accord, just can’t miss this new episode of _Snapped… _”___ _

____Oliver sat there dumbfounded for a moment, the mood having been squashed as Mary turned the volume up while taking a slow sip of his whiskey sour. Meanwhile, Wendy was fuming on the inside, her arms folded over her disheveled shirt as she looked ahead for a moment._ _ _ _

____“Look, I think I’m going to call it a night.” Oliver finally stood up. “It was really nice to meet you.”_ _ _ _

____Wendy knew there was no fighting him on this, how could she explain Mary or his strange behavior. “It was nice to meet you too, Oliver.” She sighed before shutting the door behind him._ _ _ _

____Leaning back against the door she let out a deep breath. However, there was a never a moment for a reprieve as Mary began to rip into her._ _ _ _

____“What the fuck were you thinking, Dee?!” Mary yelled as she opened her eyes to see him standing just mere feet from her. “You brought home a fucking stranger from a bar?”_ _ _ _

____“You do it all the time!” She practically screamed, her face red with fury as her body leaned forward slightly to place emphasis on her words. “It’s fuckin’ different, alright?!” Mary barked back as he flexed his hands nervously. “How, Mary; how is it different from the people you pick up and fuck almost every single night; you don’t bring them here, but you still do it!”_ _ _ _

____“When do I have fucking time to do that anymore, Dee; I’m _always _with you!” He stepped closer, his voice faltering slightly with each step. “It’s just fucking different.”___ _ _ _

______Finally they stood toe to toe, her back against the door as Mary looked down at her. The tension felt so thick she could barely breath as he leaned in, his face so close she could feel the hot breath expelling from his lips…_ _ _ _ _ _


	9. Believe in Nothing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Two years...two years have led to this very moment. 
> 
> *Explicit content ahead...you have been warned!*

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is my first time publishing any sort of smut/explicit content of any sort, so please be kind! Hoping to improve with each story. As always I'll gladly accept constructive criticism! 
> 
> *If you've ever wondered why some titles are random, I have named a few after songs I listened to while writing the chapters. Feel free to check them out if you wish.

“Let me make it up to you…” He practically whispered, before pressing his lips to hers. They both felt like they might spontaneously combust in a fit of fiery passion as he deepened the kiss, pressing his body against hers. Every day of the last two years had built them up to this moment, a moment of truly letting go in the deepest way. Something in Wendy’s mind just snapped and the earth fell away, the thought of Oliver along with it. All the anger, all the hurt, it didn’t exist anymore, at least not while Mary had his hands on her. 

His fingers brushed her cheeks, cupping her face in his hands as their tongues fought for dominance. “Fuck, Dee, I need you.” Mary groaned in between kisses. “Then have me.” Wendy pulled her face back just long enough to look at his lust drunk expression. Mary wasted no time scooping her up in his arms on a mission to her room. He practically threw her on the bed eliciting an infectious giggle from Wendy as Mary kicked his boots off before starting on her hers, quickly throwing them off to the side with his. His shirt was the second to go before he crawled on the bed, straddling her waist to resume this deep kiss as he slid his cool fingers under her shirt, slowly rolling it up as he placed sloppy kisses on the side of her face, trailing his way down her delicate neck. “Lift up, gotta get this off ’ah you.”

Wendy happily obliged in her own hazy lust and her shirt was flung to the floor leaving her in a sexy red lace bra. “Mm…one of my favorite colors.” Mary smirked for a moment as he admired more of Wendy than he had ever seen before. However, the moment she caught his gaze, something in Mary’s mind changed. This wasn’t just a quick fuck with a stranger…this was Wendy. This was his best friend, his person. This would change everything in their life, in his life. Was it worth it? Yes. Wendy was worth every risk. 

Wendy could sense this shift in Mary when he slipped off to lay beside her, only to turn and kiss Dee again with an intensity she had never experienced before. It wasn’t physical, really, it was emotional, his tongue twisting perfectly with hers as they explored each other’s mouths. 

A moan slipped from Dee’s throat as he gently sucked on her tongue, though she secretly wished he was sucking on something else. Mary took his time, eventually pulling Dee on top of him, her leather clad thighs straddling his waist as she bent and kissed his neck, trailing her lips across his collarbone to the other side before promptly sinking her teeth into his shoulder and sucking hard making sure to leave a beautiful mark. 

“Fuck, _yesss _.” Mary winced into a sexy deep moan. “Like your teeth on me, baby doll…feels _so good_.” __

____With words of encouragement Wendy moved down to his chest leaving a series of love bites around his nipples, marking him up just the way she had imagined so many times before. Mary could have busted a nut just from her infliction of the best pain, but stalled himself as he unlatched her bra, releasing the most perfect tits he’d ever seen. Full, perky and soft; they were beautiful and though he wanted to touch them, he refrained as he looked them over, burning them to memory._ _ _ _

____“It’s OK, Mare, you can touch me.” Wendy breathed as she grabbed his hands, pressing them to the warm pillowy flesh of her breasts, squeezing his fingertips around them. “Fuckin’ beautiful.” He huffed before rolling her nipples between his fingers, coxing a whimper from her as Wendy screwed her eyes shut, her head lolled back. Mary couldn’t pass the opportunity presented and sat up. Wendy remained at his waist while he took one of her nipples into his mouth, licking and sucking as she gripped his shoulders._ _ _ _

____There was no turning back for either one of them, not that they wanted to anyway. The lust seeped from their pores as he moved to the other breast, shower just as much attention. His arms wrapped tight around her back, Mary buried his face between them for a moment, inhaling the scent of Wendy’s skin. Though having been at a bar, sweating on stage, she still smelled faintly like her usual sweet self._ _ _ _

____Even through the leather and denim Wendy could feel his growing erection underneath her as she grinded down on him seeking relief herself. Mary groaned into her flesh and pushed his hips up to meet her, giving them both some needed friction._ _ _ _

____“Pants off.” Wendy managed as she pushed him back on the bed, his hands falling away from her. Mary observed this gorgeous woman in a way he never imagined possible as she slipped off the bed and began unbuckling his belt with ease, her fingers quickly finding their way to pop the button holding his pants together against an ever present strained erection. The moment almost felt all too sobering, _almost _, as Wendy dragged his zipper down revealing black boxer briefs.___ _ _ _

______“Fuck, Mare, these are tight.” Wendy huffed, but remained persistent, dragging the fabric down his shapely thighs. “Just the way I like ‘em, baby doll.” Mary groaned as her hand brushed over him. A small wet patch of precum had formed, further igniting a fire in Wendy._ _ _ _ _ _

______Wendy bit her lip as she quickly shimmied her leather pants off, but not without a struggle. They were the tightest pants she owned and only worn them on special occasions, but she never imagined the occasion would be this._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Matching set.” Mary acknowledged the sexy red lace panties on her otherwise bare body. “C’mere, baby doll.” He sat up with opened arms. The ache between her legs grew with each step until she was straddling him again, his fabric covered cock brushing against her soaked panties. Mary couldn’t help himself as his fingers traveled down between her breasts until he reached the hem of her panties. Wanting to tease her closer to the edge, he slid the pads of his fingers along the fabric one ghostly swipe up and down gaining a whimper._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Mm, you’re so wet.” He groaned and pushed her panties to the side, the contact just not close enough for Mary to be satisfied. Running his fingers along her folds he could feel her jolt above him, her jaw clinched, and eyes screwed shut. “Look at me.” Mary demanded just as he pushed his finger inside, instantly coating his fingers in her slick with another long swipe just come back and circle her clit generously._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Oh fuck, Mary!” Wendy whimpered desperately as her gaze fell upon those soul grabbing green eyes that had fixed right to her face. He looked hungry like a dog starved. But she could also see something else behind that thicket of lust in his eyes, maybe it was passion, maybe it was anger. Whatever it was, it was genuine, and she lost herself in it as she rode his expert fingers._ _ _ _ _ _

______“That’s it, baby, use me…cum on my fingers, I want to feel you.” He mumbled, his focus on her face and his own hands as she trembled above him, her thighs twitching and shaking. Wendy could feel the hot white heat tingling at her toes, pulsing its way up her thighs, before attacking her core with an intensity neither one expected. Groaning a string of obscenities, she rocked against his fingers, the friction hitting her just right as the oxygen felt like it was being sucked straight from her lungs. Wendy could have sworn she saw stars for a moment as the pleasure dropped on her like a ton of bricks, until she was whimpering mess flipped against Mary’s chest, desperate for just a breath as she panted her way through the aftershocks._ _ _ _ _ _

______“You make the most beautiful sounds.” Mary whispered against the side of her head and slowly removed his hand to suck away every sweet trace of her from his fingers. “And you’re fuckin’ delicious.” Wendy shuddered at the wet _pop_. She was spent in a way she never had been before, but no matter how spent she was in the post-orgasmic bliss, she wanted Mary, she _needed _him to be inside her._____ _ _ _

__________“I need you.” Wendy whispered against his neck before giving it a gentle peck. Mary wasted no time scooting back on the bed before he flipped them over, so he was on top. One minute he’s this confident sex god and the next he was a gentle lover so careful while he pulled her red panties off, giving him the look he’d desired since first touching her. Wendy was well groomed, not too little, not too much, perfectly to his liking, though it didn’t matter to Mary. He would have liked Wendy anyway she desired to be._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________“Got any condoms, baby doll?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________“Drawer over there.” She pointed towards the dresser by the window._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________Mary took it upon himself to go through her dresser, striking gold with a brand-new full pack in the top of the second drawer. All of a sudden, as he turned around to see this beautiful woman, to see Wendy, _his _Wendy, sprawled out so beautifully on top of her comforter, he felt a sense of responsibility weighing on him to make this the best thing she’d ever have. He thought maybe, just maybe, if he could rock her world…this could be the start of something he had wanted all along. Ridding his mind of everything but the task at hand, Mary fumbled the box open and grabbed one of the foil packs, throwing the box off to the side of the bed before rolling his boxers down to a pool of fabric at his feet. Wendy tried to hide her astonishment as she watched his cock spring free. She could feel that familiar ache forming inside as she devoured the sight of him, ingraining his stature to her memory.___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________Mary crawled back on the bed between her parted thighs and looked Wendy over as he stroked his length gently, spreading his pre over the head. He shuttered at stimulation after such neglect. Needing him then more than ever, Wendy spread her legs even further apart before he got too lost in himself that he forgot about her. But there was no way he could forget such a fucking beautiful sight._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________“You ready for me, baby?” Mary sighed before ripping the packet open. “Yes.” She sighed softly and watched him rolled the latex onto his member. “I’m ready…”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________Mary bit his lip in concentration as he moved closer, lining himself up with her entrance. He groaned at the first swipe of her slick, but soon found his place and slowly pushed in. They both felt breath catch in their throats as their hips connected._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________“You OK?” Mary rested against his forearms under her arms. “I’m fine.” Wendy breathed._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________“If you’re ever uncomfortable or you want to stop, just tell me, alright?” He was so gentle looking at her as he moved an arm from under her to brush some fallen bangs out of her face before stealing a few sweet kisses. “OK.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________This was it. The mood shifted in a way it hadn’t before. Both Mary and Wendy realized the magnitude of what they were doing, of what they had denied all this time. They both realized nothing would ever be the same. No matter how logical Wendy wished she could be, she gave into what her body needed._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________Mary finally began to move his hips, slow gentle strokes at first, the desire building in the pit of his stomach as he looked her face over. Wendy soon wrapped arms around his shoulders, pulling him closer to her. “Harder, please, Mary.” She pleaded impatiently. With an invitation Mary began to snap his hips in deep thrusts hitting Wendy just right until she was a writhing mess beneath him. “Yes, yes, right—nngghhh!” The familiar fuzzy feeling washed over her again as she clinched around him, sending Mary over the edge with her. An ungodly moan of her name passing from his lips as his hips crashed into her at a bruising pace. Mary whimpered from overstimulation but continued a few short and slow thrusts allowing her to milk his cock of anything left._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________Wendy had her arms wrapped tight around his shoulder still, both of them panting for any air their lungs could possibly consume as he pulled out and collapsed on her; the side of his face pressed perfectly against one of her breasts. Still surrounded by a warm static haze she wrapped one arm around his back and ran her fingers through his sweaty hair with the other hand before stroking his back softly. Neither one could talk and honestly didn’t want to. Mary closed his eyes for a moment, enjoying this comfortable silence as he nuzzled closer to her skin, and let out a deep sigh._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________A few moments past as their minds cleared and they both took inventory of what had just happened. Wendy refused to be the first to speak though, she didn’t know what she could say that would make this all OK…_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _


	10. Sleeping Dogs

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's time for a shower and some thoughts.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a short chapter before we dive further in.

“Let’s go take a shower.” He mumbled against her heated flesh. “Like…um, together?” Wendy asked nervously. “Well, yeah,” Mary huffed a laugh. “I think we’ve seen enough of each other to not be so shy now.” 

“I suppose you’re right.” 

However, she had never felt so shy and nervous. Mary had now seen every single part of her as she had him. How could they look each other in the eyes after this? How could they get through band practice? How could they hide it? Wouldn’t everyone know? Surely they could see the giant invisible signs about their heads reading _I fucked my best friend last night, but I swear it was no big thing._

__Mary was also the first to get up to discard the condom in the waste basket by her bed._ _

__“C’mon, baby doll, I need a shower and I’m tired.” Mary yawned and held out his hand. Nervous but needing to be near, Wendy took his hand and slipped off the bed, following him into her bathroom._ _

__She stood by the glass shower door while Mary adjusted the water temperature just hot enough to wash away the stress of the day and greasiness of the bar. “Perfect.” He nodded to himself before grabbing towels and wash clothes._ _

__“Ladies first, baby doll.”_ _

__Wendy stepped inside underneath the flowing shower head. The water calmed her aching mind and body instantly. Mary stepped in quietly, standing behind her only catching splashes of cooled water. She could feel him shiver behind her and decided to pull him flush against her back so they could both enjoy the steaming water. Mary let out a satisfied sigh and rested his head against her shoulder for a moment. His arms slowly found their way around her waist, lazily resting there as he closed his eyes, hoping this memory would stay forever. He wanted nothing more than to be worthy of this moment over and over, but with how tense Wendy moved about, he wasn’t so sure she didn’t already regret it._ _

__Meanwhile, Wendy began to think more and more about how she was probably just another notch on his lengthening belt. He probably did this with most his partners, sex, shower, cuddle. She wasn’t special, she wasn’t good enough. But still, she couldn’t fight those gentle arms cradling her belly with ease. Mary fit so perfectly against her; it was honestly a crying shame that they couldn’t be together._ _

__That’s right…even after all they had gone through to get here, it just wasn’t right, it wasn’t fair. However, Wendy was going to enjoy this night no matter what, even if it made her heart ache like a bruised rib. She needed what she thought was closure on a drawn out chapter of life._ _

__“Want me to wash your back?” Mary asked as she began running shampoo through her hair. “Oh, well, if you want to.” She bit the inside of her lip and remained turned away as Mary lathered his hands in her fruity soap before running them over her skin as if her flesh was as delicate as a silk flower. Every now and then he would be sure to lightly scratch her back, gaining a quiet hum of thanks until he had covered from her shoulders down. Wendy was glad for the constant flow of water hiding the trickle of tears sliding down her flushed cheeks. She could blame it on the hot water, right?_ _

__“Thank you, Mary.” Wendy mumbled quietly before rinsing her hair._ _

__“Anytime, baby doll.” He smiled softly, hoping that just maybe Wendy didn’t feel like he was the biggest mistake of her life._ _

__The rest of their shower was mostly uneventful, save for a few small words of exchange._ _

__“You, um…do you want me to stay?” Mary asked as they both walked back into her bedroom, towels wrapped tightly around their bodies._ _

__“You can if you want to.”_ _

__That’s not exactly the answer Mary was looking for, but he accepted it as an invitation anyway. He needed to be near to her, even just in the same room. It almost felt like if he blinked she might disappear._ _

__“I’ll be right back.” He turned towards the door and left for his room to change into some gym shorts. Wendy took this time to dress in her usual t-shirt and panties combo, finishing up right as he walked back inside._ _

__Things were uncomfortably silent as they slipped into bed. Mary wanted to scream just to hear something more. He wanted to talk to Wendy and ask her how she was feeling. He wanted to kiss her and hold her, but he could barely move as he took a few deep breaths. Deep down he knew though, that this could very well be the only night they spent together ever again, and he was going to make the best of it._ _

__“Can... can I cuddle you?” He asked, his voice soft but laced with worry. Wendy turned on her side away from him and grabbed his arm from behind, pulling Mary flush against her back while his arm draped over her waist. Mary smiled, thankful as he tucked his hand underneath maintaining a firm but comfortable grip around her._ _

__“Good night, Dee.” Mary kissed her fabric covered shoulder before promptly falling asleep._ _

__“Goodnight, Mare.” She managed to breath before a few silent tears began slipping across the bridge of her nose. She tried to blink them away, only for more to form in their place. Wendy wanted nothing more than to snuggle into his chest and listen to his strong beating heart. But she felt the need to protect herself, to protect Mary, and that meant not letting herself get too comfortable with the idea of him…_ _


	11. Coffee with a shot of Guilt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's the morning after and Mary is totally blissed. Alas, this wonderful feeling can't last too long.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The last short chapter for a while.

The next morning Mary was the first to wake. It didn’t take him long to replay the nights events as he looked down to see Wendy sprawled out on his chest, her face nuzzled against his heart while his arms held her so perfectly. A small smile tugged at the corners of his lips and his heart skipped a beat. Mary felt incredibly happy and hopeful for the first time in his life and he hoped Wendy felt the same too. Unable to control his affection seeping through, he bent down just enough the kiss the top of her head before running his fingers through her hair. 

“Mm…” Wendy grumbled and rubbed her face further into the warmth of his chest before letting out a nasally sigh. 

Although he could’ve have gladly stayed there all day, Mary wanted to surprise Dee with her favorite wake up call, coffee. He moved so carefully, replacing himself with a pillow that Wendy accepted with ease. She snuggled up against the pillow, inhaling the scent of him even in sleep. 

Mary bit his lip and smiled at this cute vision in front of him before slipping off to the kitchen to whip up a pot of coffee. A few moments later he had two cups of fresh coffee and carried them down the hall to Wendy’s room. There she was unmoved from the position he had left her. Mary almost giggled, yes, Mary Goore _almost _giggled at how cute she looked.__

__He sat a cup on his bedside table before sliding back into bed. Just as he got settled back under the covers, Wendy began to stir at the overwhelming scent of fresh coffee. She lifted her face from the pillow as her eyes fluttered open and focused on the gorgeous man beside her, a small gentle smile on his lips._ _

__“Want some coffee, baby doll?” He asked. _What kind of strange dream world had they both woken up to? _All Wendy could do was nod as she scooted to an upright position, wincing at the bruised pain between her thighs.___ _

____“You alright?”_ _ _ _

____“Yeah,” She blushed. “Just…a little sore.”_ _ _ _

____“Sorry if I was too rough, I—”_ _ _ _

____“You were fine.” Wendy cut him off by accepting her coffee._ _ _ _

____She looked down at this hot brown liquid that she depended on to function properly. All the while Wendy tried to make sense of the night before and what that meant for their current state. And Mary looked around nervously as his mind raced yet again._ _ _ _

_____This was not the way Mary Fuckin’ Goore acted around a partner. He never gave a fuck less the next morning, if he even spent the night which was a rarity. But he couldn’t let this feeling go, this push and pull of emotions inside his chest. One minute he felt hopeful and blissed, the next he thought his heart might crack into bits at her awkward stone-faced demeanor. Something had to give eventually. Regardless of the fact that they fucked, they were still best friends and they needed to work past whatever this is._ _ _ _ _

______“Dee, I…I think we need to talk about last night.” Mary looked up just as her cellphone rang._ _ _ _ _ _

______“It’s Jan.” She reached for the phone. “I have to take this, probably something about our show tonight.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Right, yeah…OK.” He rubbed the back of his neck and let out a deep sigh as Wendy disappeared down the hall leaving Mary alone in her bed for what was supposed to be a nice leisure morning together._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Hey, I just wanted to check in, see how you were doin’…how mystery man was doin’.” Wendy could hear the nosey grin form on her mouth as she spoke; and that did nothing but pull more dread to the bottom of her belly. What was she to say to this?_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Oh, I’m OK…and Oliver, he didn’t stay, just dropped me home.” Wendy bit her lip and looked down at the cooling coffee wishing nothing more than to be back in bed with Mary._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Really…you mean, you didn’t—”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“I mean, we kissed, but Mary came home soon after and it kind of ruined the mood, so he left early.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Fuckin’ cock blocker, I swear!” Jan grumbled. “Well, did you and Mary at least make up after all the shit yesterday?”_ _ _ _ _ _

______A nervous laugh almost escaped her lips as she nodded, not completely at herself enough to realize she hadn’t answered verbally._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Oh, yes, yeah…we made up.” Wendy’s voice was laced with something Jan couldn’t quite recognize. There was something more, something she hid from her. “Listen, Jan, I gotta go um…I gotta go grab breakfast. We’ll see you at three, right?”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Uh, yeah, sure…” Jan trailed off. “Three.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______After a quick exchange of pleasantries, Wendy took a deep breath and looked around the living room, trying to decided her next move. The only other move was to rip the band-aid of this relationship straight off and also cut Mary off. Each time she would start on her way to her bedroom, she couldn’t do it. Wendy wasn’t ready to say goodbye, not yet. She couldn’t bear the thought of it right then._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Three.” She stopped in the doorway and leaned against the frame._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Huh?” Mary looked up from his phone. “Three, we have to be to the club by three for soundcheck.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Oh, yeah, glad you said that. I need to change my strings.” He acknowledged until the silence ate at him again. “Look, Dee, are we going to talk about this whole thing, or?”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Do we have to right now?” She bit her lip nervously. “Can we just focus on the show?”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Yeah…” Mary’s voice faltered slightly. “The show…sure.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______The disappointment in his voice broke Wendy’s heart and watching him slip out of bed to walk past her with barely any acknowledgement sealed the fate of what she believed was right. He seemed less focused on the idea of the show when he was usually the only herding Wendy from the moment they woke up, to the moment they stepped on stage._ _ _ _ _ _

______The next few hours were spent silently in their respective rooms, getting their gear together for a show that neither of them looked forward to. Wendy didn’t feel that usual adrenaline rush that seemed to linger. She barely had the energy to put on makeup or search for the perfect outfit. In fact, her makeup was much more tamed, and her band shirt less than original._ _ _ _ _ _

______Dressed and ready with just five minutes before they had to load up and head out, Wendy could barely bring herself to open the door. Just like clockwork, Mary opened his too and they stood there looking at each other for a moment. He was handsome, sexy, even, in his stage makeup and one of the many Morbid Angel cut off shirts he had. Wendy swore he had a stockpile of the same black shirt with the all too recognizable white logo._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Ready?” Mary looked down at the floor, gripping the handle of his guitar case almost so hard Wendy thought it might crack. “Yeah.” Wendy nodded. “You?”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Yeah.” Was all he said before walking past her to the front door._ _ _ _ _ _

______With their amps and guitar cases loaded Mary took it upon himself to drive them to the venue. Wendy didn’t even challenge him at that point as he sped down the streets five miles over the limit, which he knew she hated to test. The more she glanced at him, the more she wondered why this mattered so much. Did he want to discuss sex with each partner? Did he want to discuss it with Wendy because they were housemates? Was it something more? How could it be something more; they were best friends, that’s all. That’s all they ever could be. Still with all the questions buzzing in her mind, Wendy left him be the rest of the car ride._ _ _ _ _ _

______She hadn’t realized she had been holding her breath the last few seconds until they parked at load in and a deep breath expelled from her lips. Mary still remained silent as he shut the car off and quietly opened his door._ _ _ _ _ _

______Wendy felt as if someone had pushed her heart down to her stomach as she followed in suit and grabbed her guitar from the back after he walked inside. Mary never left her out back behind a bar, he _always _waited for her so they could hype each other up on the walk to the stage. He always had the perfect Mary Goore things to say to get her going. Not this time…_ _ _ _ _ _ __

______The walk down the long grey concrete hall felt incredibly lonely, even as she reached the floor where Jan, Jack, and their bandmates stood conversing with one another while Mary was in his own world, messing around with the amps._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Hey…” Wendy tried to muster a smile and only failed as Jan unfolded her arms revealing a splinted middle finger. “Oh fuck.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“I wanted to call you, but I figured you’d want to cancel the show and we’ve had this booked for so long it wouldn’t be fair to cancel when you two can do it.” Jan spoke quickly, a sympathetic expression on her face. “You two are a better team together than the three of us put together; well, you will be if he gets out of this shitty mood.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Wendy looked back at Mary still seemingly emotionless as he continued to check the equipment._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Yeah…”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“What’s with him anyway; I thought you two worked the whole Ana thing out…something else happen last night that you didn’t tell me about?” Jan pressed._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Oh, he’s just…being, well, Mary.” Dee shrugged. “I’m going to go tune up and get settled.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Before Jan could question her further, Wendy walked towards the stage steps and found a place by her amp._ _ _ _ _ _

______Jan watched closely, this slow train wreck in front of her taking place. She had never seen Mary or Wendy act like this, even last night wasn’t as strange as this. Sure, Wendy could be the quiet type, but Mary never shut up. His greeting was less than warm towards Jan and the rest of their bandmates, but he didn’t even acknowledge Wendy as she stood beside him. The more Jan watched, the more she noticed that they avoided touching each other; even a friendly squeeze of the shoulder or a playful slap on the arm that they always shared while setting up. It’s as if they were too afraid or angry to even glance. That’s when it all clicked for Jan…only the guilty could act so, well, _guilty _.___ _ _ _ __

________That little imaginary sign Wendy worried about was ever present on their foreheads. They had obviously finally fucked. But why hadn’t Wendy told her? Was it bad? Did Mary fuck up afterwards? He was always bad about fucking around and saying the dumbest shit that seemed to carry the heaviest punch though he didn’t always realize it. Jan could only assume he said something stupid. She was determined to help fix it though; not before the show, but definitely after for sure. Their band was a vision that couldn’t be sacrificed, not over something like this…not when they deserved to be together anyway._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _


	12. Only For The Weak

“Alright, let’s get started.” Jan spoke loudly as she clapped her hands and stepped behind the controls on the middle of the floor. 

Mary and Wendy both sat their guitars on their stands and stepped down to join her, wishing to have as much input as their bandmates took their initial individual turns with sound. They barely spoke enough to give Jan pointers and suggestions go after go. The elephant in the room only seemed to grow as the two of them took their respective spots for the final check with the whole band. 

Jan was quick to suggest Dee and Mary play their favorite warm up song, hoping this would force a bit of the tension away. They both scrunched their noses up at the idea but obliged the ridiculous attempt. 

Wendy would’ve been lying if she said she didn’t find solace in the small bit of comfort it provided as she looked over at Mary. There was no way they could make it through a full show acting the way they had been the last few hours. Knowing it to be true, she shot him a small bashful smile which gained a small familiar smirk from Mary before he looked back down to his guitar for an upcoming solo. Wendy’s heart fluttered at this small but significant expression. She missed the kindness that always presented itself in his face, at least towards her. She missed her best friend even though he was standing right beside her. 

“Fantastic!” Jan clapped happily. “That’s the best I think you’ve ever sounded; not to mention this is probably one of the best venues to accommodate sound.” 

“Thanks for the help, Jan.” Wendy smiled as she spoke into the mic. “Anytime, Dee; you know I’ve got you.” 

All around morale began to rise as the band exited the stage for a pre-show shot in the dressing room. They had been playing together for two years, well, two years with Mary; and this was the first time they actually had a dressing room that was large enough for everyone to move around easily. It wasn’t incredible in size by any means, but the floor was open with a vanity on one of the far ends of the white painted concrete walls, while a large black sectional rested against two of the other walls, and a clothing rack sat just off to the side. 

“Dude, this place is massive!” Adam grinned as he did a 360o turn taking it all in. 

Mary and Wendy both laughed quietly and shook their heads before taking up residence on one end of the sectional. She was surprised he sat so close, but Dee wasn’t going to complain. Feeling the warmth of his thigh as it accidentally brushed against hers made her heart flutter, but deep down, it was bittersweet and just as agonizing as comforting. 

“Shots all around!” Jan emerged through the door with Jack, both of them holding trays of shot glasses and a bottle of vodka. 

The whole band clapped and yelled as they sat everything on the glass coffee table, expertly filling each glass and barely wasting a drop. This was the most Dee and Wendy had seen of Jack since he and Jan began dating. They always secretly scoffed and made fun of Jack the handful of times they had been around him. He wasn’t exactly their type of people. Of course, Wendy wasn’t exactly Jan or Mary’s type of people when they first met either. For the sake of caring about Jan, they made it a rule once she and Jack got engaged, Dee and Mary would be nice and supportive. Jack wasn’t a bad guy, he was just normal…vanilla, if you will. 

“To a night we’ll never forget, one step closer to the real thing!” Jan raised her glass prompting everyone else to do the same. “You guys are going to fuck some shit up in the best way!” 

After a hum of cheer everyone clinked their glasses together before swallowing down some liquid courage. 

“Fuckin’ nasty.” Mary furrowed his brows and twisted his lips. “Says the guy who’d rather have a shot of cheap whisky.” Wendy teased. “Always have, always will.” 

Wendy smiled at the empty glass happy to feel somewhat normal, while Mary was dying on the inside. No matter how much he tried to not think about it, no matter how much he tried to distract himself with music, all Mary could see when he looked at Wendy was rejection. Mary had experienced enough rejection early in life that he became the nasty hard Goore boy everyone loved to hate; rejection was nothing to him anymore, and he cursed himself for letting his guard down only to be rejected again by this person he held so close to his cold black heart. 

However in the middle of all this pain Mary had a job to do. He wanted to prove to himself, to Wendy, to everyone, that even though they had slept together, it didn’t have to affect the band. Bandmates fuck all the time, right? Why did this have to be any different? That was the big lie he had to keep repeating in his mind every time she’d look over his way and smiled or searched for the goodness of their friendship. 

He and Wendy listened to everyone go on about their plans for once they landed the record deal. They spoke so highly of the situation believing it was in the bag no matter how many times Dee had encouraged them to be realistic every conversation since learning about the upcoming Halloween show. She had anxiety, believing that not only was she undeserving of Mary, but also success of that degree. 

“Hey,” Mary leaned over, ghosting his lips against her ear. “It’s gonna happen, alright; we’re gonna get this deal. I know you like being a pessimist about it, but let yourself just daydream a little…” 

Dee could feel her heart pounding in her chest as if she had just ran a marathon. The absence of his lips as he sat back on the sofa made her lungs ache. There was no steadying her breathing as she threw a small smile his way before standing up.

“And just where do you think you’re going?” Jan smirked.

“It’s a little stuffy in here, just going out for some air.” Wendy spoke over the chatter almost hoping Mary would follow her, even though she didn’t know what to say. Alas, he didn’t follow her, in fact, she didn’t see him again until five minutes before the show. 

Finally, they all stood backstage, the bar was filled to capacity, honestly something they didn’t even expect considering their songs had seemed to only reach the underground scene. 

“You’re gonna be great, Dee; you’re always great. Landing a place like this is only further proof.” Mary looked over, his heart fluttering as their eyes met. 

“I’m scared, Mare; this place is different, it’s bigger and I wasn’t expecting to play in Jan’s place…I—” 

“It is different and scary, but different and scary can be good; change can be good.” He threw that last line in, hoping to make a deeper point. “Being scared isn’t what matters, how you handle it…that’s what matters.” 

Mary squeezed Dee’s shoulder and before she could even reply, it was time to go on. The crowd was massive, at least three hundred people packed into the space. They had never played to more than one hundred and fifty, and that was supporting someone else at some shit dive bar. 

The adrenaline pumped through Wendy’s veins as she approached her mic. She looked over to Mary one last time, who nodded with a small gentle smile before addressing the crowd in his most dramatic Mary Goore bow. Everyone around Dee seemed so calm and cool while she was this insane mess on the inside waiting to crack and crumble into a pit of nothingness. 

“How is everyone doing tonight?” Wendy spoke into the mic, still unsure of herself. The crowd erupted in cheers. “Fuck, there’s a lot of people here.” This observation elicited quite a few eager laughs. The more she looked at these smiling faces and listened to the buzzing of their voices cheering and yelling, the cooler she felt. 

Finally ready after a lengthy silence, Dee looked at Mary again and nodded for him to kick things off. It’s as if he knew just the way to comfort her, even with his movements. Though she was more than stiff through the first song, her voice slightly faltering in nervousness. As soon as the second song hit, Wendy transformed. Her voice came tumbling out of her body, packing the perfect punch to keep the crowd engaged and even yelling some of the lyrics back to her. That was a surprise to say the least. 

Not only was Wendy her usual bustling energetic self on stage, she and Mary were working together. She couldn’t help but to look over at him during a few solos, admiring this gorgeous man at work, doing what he so loved. He was beautiful, and he was walking right towards her as the second solo hit, prompting them both to get lost in each other, inching closing and closer until they were almost touching at the knees. Mary tilted his head back, his face contorted with a hint of euphoria as he let his emotions speak through the music. Wendy’s fingers almost faltered on the spot as she observed his features.

It was then when he opened his eyes and looked at her, the fake blood and sweat dripping down his face and neck, that she realized for certain…he could never be hers. Maybe Mary could never be anybody’s someone. He was a wild card and never predictable. Wendy was vanilla just like Jack. Anytime she chose to be spontaneous, it always ended in disaster, just like choosing to sleep with Mary. It was a mistake…that she wished she could make the same one over and over again, but no matter how many times she could, it wouldn’t change the situation at hand. She didn’t want Mary’s ‘I want to let you down easy’ speech that he likely gave to everyone who gave more of themselves than planned. She didn’t want to be one of them. 

Wendy was pulled from her thoughts as the show ended, leaving them to wander back to the dressing room to freshen up before mingling with the crowd. It all felt like a dream sequence, hearing the echo of the crowd cheering and clapping as the band walked down the concrete hallway to the room that was once spacious but now felt so small. 

Sweat dripped down Wendy’s back, making her black shirt an even deeper hue. She shivered from the temperature change as she walked in last and stood in front of the vanity, freshening up her makeup to seem somewhat presentable before joining the people. Dazed, she barely acknowledged Jan busting through the door, singing praise along with Jack. 

“Fucking beautiful! You two were on fire tonight!” She squealed as Dee turned around and glanced from Mary to Jan. “Passionate and raw; now I’m kind of glad I sprained my finger.” 

The two of them still remained silent as Mary sat on the sectional and Wendy remained sitting back against the vanity. 

“How can you not be fucking excited?!” Jan stomped her foot like an angry child. This back and forth roller coaster of emotions the two of them had conjured up was driving Jan up the wall. Especially the silence that seemed to follow them after such an amazing night. 

“Everybody out…NOW!” Jan demanded as the band began filing out. “No way, you two stay.” She stopped Mary and Wendy as they tried to sweep past her. Even Jack was kicked out, leaving just Jan, Mary and Wendy. 

“You two have been acting like guilty children since you got here; somebody better tell me what’s going on and do it quickly!” 

“Nothing.” They both spoke quietly in unison. “For fucks sake; Mary, you never shut the fuck up even when asked; and Wendy, even when you’re quiet, you’re never this quiet. If there’s nothing to hide, why do you both look guilty?” 

The frustration rose in Jan’s chest as they both sat on the couch, a decent but of room between the two of them. Their arms crossed and a sullen look on their faces only intensified the feeling in Jan. 

“Did you guys sleep together?” She finally asked. “Is that what this attitude is about?” 

They both remained in this cutthroat silence, save for Wendy shifting in her seat. 

“It’s fucking obvious, alright; you had sex, OK; what’s so bad about that?” Jan huffed. “Did one of you do something embar—” 

“Fucking Christ, Jan!” Wendy stood up. “Can we just not; we have people we need to go meet, mingle with the crowd…I think anyone’s sex life, existent or not is the least of your concern right now.” 

Jan stood there, mouth gaping open as Wendy walked past her, never even glancing back at Mary who sank further back into his spot. As the door slammed and Wendy hurried down the hall, Jan looked to Mary again, his eyes seeming glassier than before. 

“Wh—um, what the fuck was that?!” She finally managed. “What happened between you two last night; she said you guys made up after the whole Ana and Oliver thing, but it doesn’t much seem like it now.” 

Mary shook his head and took a deep breath before leaning forward. His heart and mind raced against each other, unsure of which one would admit guilt first. 

“Things happened so fast.” He breathed. “One minute we were arguing, practically in each other’s faces yelling, and the next…” 

“And the next what, Mare?” 

“And the next we were in bed together, not for a movie night, not for talking…we—holy fuck this is the first time I’m saying it out loud and it feels weird.” He looked up at Jan. “We had sex. Wendy and I had _sex _.”__

__“I’m going to sound like some weak bitch sayin’ this; but what does it really matter now?” Mary shrugged. “It was the best sex I’ve ever had in my life; and we all know my reputation prior to knowing Dee. It wasn’t about the orgasm, but that was fucking spectacular, it was about who I was with.”_ _

__“And what is so wrong with that then, it sounds like the perfect situation finally coming to fruition. So what’s the issue?” Jan smiled sympathetically, knowing just how impossibly difficult it was for Mary to admit to it, let alone show this level of vulnerability._ _

__“I don’t know, Jan, she’s been acting weird ever since.” He sighed and shook his head. “She acts like she’s repulsed by me; and any other time I’d write it off as a mood, but not this time. I’ve tried to talk to her, and she brushes it off.”_ _

__“I’m sure she’s just trying to process it; give her a chance, Mare…this is a lot to take in.”_ _

__Mary was shaken up, his body almost trembling as he stepped towards the door._ _

__“She doesn’t need time, Jan; I’m not good enough for her and I knew that, but I still made a move. Things can’t go back to the way they were, and I have to accept that. I fucked up and thought with my…I don’t know…with somethin’ else other than my dick for once. And it has cost me so much in just a few short hours.”_ _

__“What do you mean, Mare; of course you can’t go back, but you two can move forward, together.” Jan tried to encourage. “No…we can’t; I can’t look at her knowing that I…” His throat tightened as the words threatened to fall from his lips until he quickly turned them around. “Knowing that she looks at me like a mistake.” Mary looked back towards Jan as he grabbed the doorknob. “There is no moving forward together.”_ _


	13. Mary Had a Little Lamb

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Too many shots, chicken nuggets and bath time.

Before Jan could even muster a response Mary had disappeared down the hall and into the sea of people swarming the bar. There among them was Wendy tossing back shots like apple juice with a small group of fan congregated around her trying to keep up. She was three shots in when Mary caught her eye…and the eyes of a few girls just down the island. 

“Hey handsome,” A tall redhead grabbed his arm. “Do a shot with us?” 

“Ah, thanks, but not tonight.” Mary pulled from her grasp. “I’m the DD.” 

“For who?” She snorted and looked in the direction of Wendy. “That train wreck over there?” 

“C’mon, just one shot and maybe you’ll agree to join me and my girlfriends out back for a… _smoke _.” Mary could feel his blood boil as she brushed his arm again.__

__“The only person I want to _smoke _with is that so called train wreck, over there.” He yanked his arm back a little harsher this time.___ _

____“I knew you were too good to be true.” The girl smirked. “All the stories must be wildly overexaggerated.”_ _ _ _

____Mary wanted so badly to just give her a piece of his mind, but the only thing on his mind was the woman downing her fifth shot, barely able to stand up straight as some guy offered to prop her up on his shoulder._ _ _ _

____“Think what you want, lady, I could give a fuck less.” Mary mumbled before pushing through the smoky crowd until he was face to face with Dee._ _ _ _

____“Mare bear!” Wendy slurred as she pushed off the stranger beside her and practically threw her body against Mary. He stumbled back slightly, not entirely ready for the weight of her body to be thrust on his shoulder._ _ _ _

____“Guys this is my best friend, Mare bear…I mean, Mary.” Wendy hiccupped and giggled as the guys greeted him with less fanfare as expected. “Do a shot with me, Maarrryyy!”_ _ _ _

____“How bout we get you home, Dee?” Mary spoke aloud. “I think you’ve had enough.”_ _ _ _

____“Nu-uh! I’ve had four…” She held up three fingers. “No, wait, five…or was it six.”_ _ _ _

____“And that’s more than enough, now let me take you home.” He insisted again. “Look, man, the lady says she wants to stay, so let her stay.” One of the guys grabbed his arm._ _ _ _

____Even in her drunken state, Wendy swore she could see a flash of red in his eyes as he stared the guy down._ _ _ _

____“I suggest you let me go before I fuck your whole world up, man; she’s had enough and she’s going home.”_ _ _ _

____“He really will too.” Wendy slurred as she leaned on Mary’s arm. “I’ve seen him do it before…it’s not prettyyyy!”_ _ _ _

____Wendy’s legs began to feel like Jell-O as she tried to stand up straight, but the alcohol proved to be too much. Just as the asshole let Mary’s arm go and scurried off, Wendy’s knees buckled, and Mary managed to throw her over his back._ _ _ _

____“Put me down!” She protested with gentle pounding to his back. “Not a chance, baby doll, it’s time to go home.” Mary huffed as he waded through the crowd._ _ _ _

____“And that is what he turned us down for…” The redhead spoke loudly as Mary began to walk past her and her girlfriends. “Offer a guy a threesome and he leaves with the drunken princess.”_ _ _ _

____Though Wendy was more than wasted, she heard the comment and sobered up just for a moment as she lifted her head to glare at the women._ _ _ _

____“You girls are so cute, I swear.” Wendy smirked and slapped Mary’s ass causing him to pause in his tracks. “This drunken princess will keep you poor pathetic wannabes in mind while I’m deep throating his cock on the ride home.”_ _ _ _

____Mary smirked and shook his head. No matter how fucked up Wendy could get, she was still a sharp little bitch when she wanted to be, and she was on a roll tonight._ _ _ _

____“That’s right, baby doll. Better get that pretty little mouth ready for me.” Mary slapped her ass in return and turned to wink at them before continuing his quest to the load in area at the back._ _ _ _

____A few moments of silence passed as they approached the back lot and Mary finally put her down._ _ _ _

____“Did…did you really mean that?” Wendy hiccupped. “That you want me to—”_ _ _ _

____“The only thing I want you to do is get in the car and let me drive us home before you up chuck everywhere.” Mary spoke quietly as he opened the door._ _ _ _

____“Can we get some chicken nuggets?” Wendy looked up before he closed the door, an involuntary smile tugging at his lips. No matter how hurt or angry he might have felt, he couldn’t say no to her, especially when she asked for something so simple._ _ _ _

____“Sure, baby doll, we’ll get some chicken nuggets.”_ _ _ _

____“And fries?” She looked over as he started the car._ _ _ _

____“Yes,” Mary laughed. “and fries.”_ _ _ _

____“OK.” Dee nodded as she looked out the window, a pit of sadness filling her stomach for a moment before breaking out into _Mary Had A Little Lamb _like she was in pre-school again. At first it was funny, even Mary chuckled at her, but then they both realized something.___ _ _ _

______“Mary, I’m the lamb.” She looked over at him, her eyes glassed from alcohol and threatened tears. “I am the lamb that couldn’t avoid the slaughter because I’m an idiot.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“You’re not an idiot, Dee, don’t say that.” Mary sighed as he pulled into the parking lot of a fast food joint. Lucky for them they were next in line; but unlucky for Wendy they didn’t have chicken nuggets._ _ _ _ _ _

______“What restaurant doesn’t have chicken nuggets on a fucking Saturday night?!” Wendy exclaimed as Mary started on their drive home. One minute they were laughing at her fast food rant, the next they were quiet as mice and on the verge of tears. There was no in between, it was one medium or the other. The roller coaster was too much for either of them to take, especially Wendy being a drunken mess._ _ _ _ _ _

______“C’mon, Dee, let’s get you inside.” Mary scooped her up in his arms from before pushing her door shut with his boot covered foot._ _ _ _ _ _

______“I want chicken nuggets!” Wendy demanded as he unlocked the front door of their apartment. “Shhh…I’ll make some for you, I promise; just lower your voice before we get kicked out.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Wendy began to pout as he sat her on the couch and removed her shoes before disappearing to the kitchen to throw some frozen nuggets and fries in the oven. Mary took a deep breath and leaned back against the countertop attempting to contemplate all that had happened over the last forty-eight hours. There was no time though as that nauseous feeling hit Wendy like a ton a bricks._ _ _ _ _ _

______“I’m gonna be sick!” She yelled before covering her mouth as she stumbled to her bathroom. Mary was hot on her trail, grabbing a hair tie from the bathroom sink to twist her hair up in the messiest bun before she paid her dues to the porcelain gods. “That’s it, Dee, get it all up.” Mary encouraged while rubbing her back._ _ _ _ _ _

______“I’m so sorry, Mary.” Wendy sobbed as he flushed the toilet and wiped her face with a towel before she was back at it again. “It’s OK, Dee, you’re gonna be alright, baby doll.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“No,” Her back trembled as she cried away the last traces of makeup. “I’m sorry…for everything. You’re my best friend, Mare.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Mary didn’t know what to say as he wiped her face again while rubbing her back in support. Lucky for him there was no chance as she continued her efforts to rid her stomach of all its content. He got a little nervous for a moment, shocked by how much she had thrown up. She looked so pale and clammy as she sat back for the final time._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Dee, you good?” Mary held her face in his hands and looked her over. “Y-yeah, just tired.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Her lip quivered as she looked at his makeup covered face for a moment._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Let’s get you in the bath, alright; you’ll thank yourself in the morning.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“OK.” Dee let out a tiny sob. “Can you help me take this off, please?”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Mary nodded as she lifted her arms up, allowing him to remove the soiled shirt from her body. This time she had on a navy blue lacy bra, but Mary didn’t care. Her body looked as pale as her face and he was worried. His focus was providing her with as much modesty as possible, wrapping her bare body in a towel before turning the water on to a comfortable temperature._ _ _ _ _ _

______A few minutes passed and a bubble bath was ready. Wendy stepped out of her towel as Mary looked away and held out his hand to help her in. Seated amongst the bubbles, she gave Mary permission to turn around._ _ _ _ _ _

______“I’m going to wash your hair, OK?” Mary took a plastic cup from the shelf to his left and dipped in the water. “OK.” Wendy nodded and allowed him to pour the warm water over her head. He did this a few times until her hair was sopping and ready for shampoo._ _ _ _ _ _

______“The food is going to burn, you know?” Wendy spoke aloud as she scrubbed her scalp with his fingers. “It’s fine, I put it on a lower heat just in case I couldn’t grab it in time.” Mary shrugged._ _ _ _ _ _

______“That’s smart.” She nodded and allowed him to continue with rising, condition, and rinsing again before giving her a washcloth and soap._ _ _ _ _ _

______“What about you, don’t you want a shower to wash the makeup off?”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“I’ll do that once I get you settled in; no way am I leaving you in a tub full of water.” Mary turned away and leaned back against the tub to give her some privacy._ _ _ _ _ _

______The moments seemed to pass by so slowly as the water splashed on occasion while Dee washed her body, removing the stench of vomit and bar smoke. She had never felt so low in her life realizing everything was wrecked in total. Her head was still swimming too much to really think about it as she pulled the plug and the water began to drain._ _ _ _ _ _

______“I’m ready to get out now.” Her voice faltered momentarily as she fought off more tears._ _ _ _ _ _

______Mary remained in place and handed the first towel behind his head for Dee to wrap her hair, then the second for her body. Finally he stood up and held out his hand to help._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Let’s get you settled into bed. Then I’ll get your food and you can eat while I shower, alright?”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Can I brush my teeth first, please?”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Sure, I’ll get your clothes while you do that.” Mary agreed before disappearing through the doorway to her closet to grab an oversized shirt and some panties. He didn’t even bother to look, just stuck his hand in a drawer and pulled a pair of black bikini cut panties. By the time he had finished Wendy was standing by her bed still wrapped up in the towel._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Can you get dressed on your own?” Mary walked over and sat the clothes on the bed._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Y-yeah, just go do whatever you need to do.” Wendy bit her lip and cast her gaze to the floor, an increasing awareness began to surround her._ _ _ _ _ _

______Mary never said another word as he left to check on the food that probably was in fact burnt. To his surprise it was only half finished which left him the perfect amount of time to shower. The food didn’t really fucking matter though, not with the way he was feeling. Not with the way Wendy was feeling._ _ _ _ _ _

______“It’s halfway, so when I get out it should be ready.” Mary spoke from the doorway as he knocked on the frame to announce himself._ _ _ _ _ _

______“That’s OK.” Wendy barely whispered as she climbed into bed._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Will you be good on your own?”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Sure, yeah, I’ll be fine.” Her voice continued to falter, but Mary just didn’t have the emotional capacity to deal with both their griefs. He was grieving for the loss of something he never had, while he thought she was just grieving a friendship that could possibly come to pass if they refused to resolve this tension._ _ _ _ _ _

______As much as he would like to say that he wished he could take it back, if he had it to do over, he would do exactly what he did the night before. Living on pins and needles the entire existence of their friendship, especially since he had moved in, he was glad something had finally happened…even if it did possibly cost them both the best friendship they had ever experienced._ _ _ _ _ _

______Mary tried to wash away not only the remnants of the bar, but also the feelings that had been seeping from his existence for two days. He wished he could be angry and finished with Wendy; well, really, he just wished he could stop the hurt in his chest. The ache was unlike anything else, something he had long forgotten after years of promiscuity without strings attached. With the makeup removed and hair slicked back, Mary dressed and walked into the kitchen to check on Wendy’s food._ _ _ _ _ _

______He was right on time, stacking the hot and fresh food on a plate before grabbing a bottle of water and some ketchup from the fridge._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Food is—” He rounded the corner into her room to see Wendy snuggled up under the sheets in a deep sleep._ _ _ _ _ _

______Taking a deep defeated breath he sat the plate on her bedside table in case she woke in the middle of the night._ _ _ _ _ _

______With nothing else to do Mary decided to make himself comfortable in the soft crème colored chair by the window, having a perfect view of Wendy to make sure she was breathing. He worried more than anything that she’d throw up in her sleep and he was determined that wasn’t going to happen on his watch._ _ _ _ _ _

______The hours passed so slowly giving Mary adequate time to revise the situation for what it was. Eventually he knew what he needed to do…_ _ _ _ _ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mary and Wendy are being...Mary and Wendy, so buckle up and get ready for the next few chapters.


	14. We Only Say Goodbye

Wendy woke the next morning on her side facing the doorway. Her head and body instantly began pounding in a way she didn’t even know was possible. 

“Mmm…” She groaned unpleasantly as Wendy flipped on her back and sat up before opening her eyes again. “Jesus Christ!” she gasped in surprise as she looked over to see Mary sitting on the chair to her left, staring right at Dee. 

“Didn’t mean to scare you.” Mary spoke quietly as he stood up and grabbed the aspirin bottle from her bedside. “Here, take these and drink this.” He handed pills and a bottle of water her way. 

“Thanks.” She whispered, the pounding from her brain still present and strong. 

Mary just nodded as he walked back over to his spot. Wendy observed him for a moment as he sat there looked down at his fingers laced together. That’s when she noticed the duffle bag by his feet. 

“What’s that for?” Dee nodded towards the navy blue bag. 

Mary bit his lip and remained silent for a moment long before looking at her again. Wendy could feel her heart drop to her stomach as his tired eyes pierced right through her. 

“Dee, I think maybe I should leave.” He sighed. 

“But…why; I mean, if this is about last night, I’m sorry for acting like an idiot. I promise it won’t happen again—” 

“It’s not about last night; you and I have taken care of each other on more than one occasion like that.” Mary shook his head. “Things just aren’t right between us, not now.” 

“I don’t understand.” Wendy’s voice cracked as the tears welled up in her eyes. “Did I do something wrong?” 

“Whatever it is, tell me what I can do to fix it.” She pleaded almost in an embarrassing tone. 

“You wanna fix it, let’s talk about the other night.” Mary offered with unsurprising push back. 

“Mary, please, let’s just move forward…” 

“We can’t move forward until we talk.” He shook his head as he stood up. “Then I guess we won’t move forward.” Dee shrugged. 

“I guess we won’t.” Mary grabbed his bag. “I’ll come by in a few days and get the rest of my stuff; I’ll make sure it’s when you’re at work…so you won’t have to deal—” 

“Fine!” Wendy spat back as the pulsing pain filled her head causing her to wince and cover her eyes, searching for a comfortable pressure. 

Mary tried to take a deep breath, but his lungs only ached more at his attempt. He tried so hard to mumble a quiet goodbye as he walked towards the door, but nothing would come out. 

Just as the pain subsided and Wendy looked up after a lengthy silence…Mary was gone. 

“Goodbye, Mary.” She tried to catch her breath before breaking into an ugly sobbing mess buried in the pillow that still smelled like him. 

Why couldn’t she just be fucking normal for once? Why couldn’t she be unafraid of rejection? Why couldn’t she let herself be happy? Why couldn’t she just tell Mary the truth? Maybe he felt the same way…yeah, right. He just wanted to clear the air and get back to normal, but Wendy couldn’t go back to normal, no matter how much she could try to kid herself. This was the end of the most beautiful, but also most painful chapter of her life. 

She cried until she was a heaving mess in front of her toilet throwing up until there was nothing left. After an hour on the cold tile floor Wendy crawled to the kitchen and rummaged through the fridge for something simple to eat. However, she just broke into tears again the sight of the peanut butter kiss cookies from earlier that week. How could things have changed so fast? And for the ultimate worse? 

It hadn’t even been an hour and she wanted to call the one person she knew she couldn’t. If this was a taste of what life would be like, she couldn’t stand the thought of living it too long. How could she survive such a loss? David, her ex, was a bad situation. But she didn’t even cry over him this way. Of course, she could care less about him, so that wasn’t a good example. 

While Wendy cried over cookies, Mary showed up on Jan and Jack’s doorstep. 

“Mary…” Jan opened the door to a tearful and tired man gripping his duffle bag like it was the only thing he owned. 

“I’m sorry it’s so early.” Mary sniffled. “But I didn’t know where else to go and—” 

Jan never said a word as she stepped forward and wrapped her arms around his trembling frame, he sobbed into the shoulder of her cotton robe. 

“I l-left.” He continued to sob.

Jan had witnessed him sad before but had never _ever _seen Mary cry.__

__“You can stay here as long as you need, Mare, you know you always have a place.” Jan spoke softly as she pulled away from him and pushed the door further open as an invitation. “I was just about to make breakfast, so let’s eat and then talk, OK?”_ _

__“You sure Jack won’t mind?” Mary asked as he wiped his face on his sleeve. “He’s at the office right now, early morning preparation for a case he has tomorrow; I doubt he’ll be home until late tonight.”_ _

__Mary still sniffled with no control over his feelings. He had been holding his breath much longer than the past two days, but he finally hit his breaking point. There was no hiding his true self, his vulnerable side that he thought he’d thrown in the abyss along with the belief in love and relationships._ _

__After getting his things settled into a guest room on the second floor, Jan gave him a small tour before taking to the kitchen for a cup of coffee._ _

__“You look like you haven’t slept.” She acknowledged his tired eyes and poured a cup of strong black coffee for Mary._ _

__“I haven’t.” His voice sounded hoarse. “I was up all night making sure she didn’t throw up in her sleep.”_ _

__Jan smiled sadly and nodded before whisking to eggs while bacon fried in a pan and a box of frozen waffles sat to the side for the very end._ _

__“How hungry are you, Mare?” Jan looked over before pouring the eggs in another pan._ _

__“Starving, haven’t eaten anything since before the show.” He sighed before blowing on the coffee._ _

__“Fucking hell, Mary, you really need to eat.” She furrowed her brows and put a couple pieces of crispy bacon on a paper towel. “Eat this while I finish up.”_ _

__Even though he was starving, he didn’t want to eat. Jan was persistent though and would have shoved it down his throat if he tested her. Chewing on the savory pieces his body instantly thanked him._ _

__“A little better?”_ _

__“Yeah, thanks, Jan.” Mary tried to muster a sad crooked smile before sipping his coffee._ _

__The silence plagued them for a moment, awkward tension building while the elephant in the room became more present. Wendy’s name rested on the back of both their tongues, but Mary was the first to speak. He thought long and hard, but all the words felt so jumbled in his head._ _

__“That wasn’t really her. Lashing out like that, I mean.” Mary looked up. “She panics under pressure sometimes…with the show and what happened, I think she had a moment and sorta cracked...and you ended up being the person to experience it.”_ _

__“I know.” Jan nodded. “She has her good days and bad days, we all do; and honestly, I shouldn’t have pushed it, at least, not the way that I did.”_ _

__She wasn’t wrong, Jan took it a little too far this time. Even Mary was a little annoyed and surprised by her forcefulness initially._ _

__“So from now on, just call me on it if I get a little too intense, alright?” She offered a lopsided smile and place a plate of food in front of him before taking the spot beside Mary with hers. Mary quietly nodded and look down at the food for a moment, worried and wondering if Dee was too weak to make breakfast for herself. It’s as if Jan could read his mind._ _

__“She can be tough as nails when she wants to be.” Jan offered. “If she doesn’t feel like making something, she’ll order it, trust me.”_ _

__Again Mary nodded silently before stabbing at one of the waffles on his plate. Though the hunger pang was more intense having eaten just a little, he still felt so conflicted. How do you go through the motions of a breakup if you were never really together? Truthfully, breaking up with your best friend is just as painful, if not more painful than breaking up with a significant other; and Mary felt that with every bit of his being._ _

__Soon breakfast was over, and Mary helped Jan with the dishes. He felt so tired like he could drop to the floor in a pile at any moment, but no matter how badly he wished to sleep, his body couldn’t shut down. He couldn’t stop thinking about those final words, or the scared and angry little girl hiding behind them._ _

__“C’mon, Goore, let’s go to the living room and talk, you need somewhere comfy to sit for this.” Jan offered now that their coffees had been refreshed._ _

__The living room was everything Jan wasn’t. It was very bright white and gold, the couches, the floor, the white marble fireplace, the glass coffee table lined in gold accents. However, Mary smiled at the small things she managed to sneak in as unique artsy fartsy décor like the pressed butterflies and the Victorian medical books. She was proof that people like he and Jan could evolve and make a good life still connected to the core of who they are. Even through all the stupid shit, this gave him a little flicker of empty hope in the hopeless._ _

__“Just say what you want to say, and I’ll listen; no judgement, no interjecting, I’m just a set of ears right now.” Jan sat back on the far end of the couch before turning her body more towards him._ _

__Mary took a deep breath and pondered on his feelings for a moment, and all that had happened in a two day period. But not only that, all that had happened in the last six months. At that point the dam just broke, and words came flowing out with an honest intensity.  
“I learned real young to avoid rejection by rejecting all notions of…love…and relationships. I figured out that fuckin’ and forgetting was what worked best for me. I had a couple ’ah good friends, music, and a shitty bar job that paid the bills.” He paused to sip his coffee. “Then some impossible woman decided she wanted to clean the cuts on my hands even after she had seen the fuckin’ worst of me.” _ _

__“I didn’t wanna know her, well, really, I just didn’t want to feel rejected yet again; I didn’t need any new friends. I had you and Al and that was enough…but she was so persistent with her kindness. At the same time she was just as cautious.”_ _

__Jan’s heart ached as she listened to Mary speak as if he were a totally new person._ _

__“Then we just sorta showed up in each other’s lives. It was slow at first, runnin’ into each other at Davis’ or Archies, then long walks with no destination…then she became the one person who I relied on and cared about more than myself. I didn’t mean for that to happen, but it did. And when I first moved in, I was skeptical of how well it would really work out. At the end of the day we are still opposites in a lot of ways. I’m a nasty son of a bitch, and she is so mild and kind.” He paused again._ _

__“But she showed me what it was like to live a decent life and still be myself. She made me want to be better though, stop fuckin’ around and really make something happen with music…and we’ve been makin’ progress with that dream, all of us have, until now.”_ _

__Mary wiped his falling tears as he thought back on the last two years, his heart continuing to ache so badly he thought he might die if it last more than a few days._ _

__“You know, it’s so stupid, lookin back on it now after all this. She never once shied away from telling her dumb old college friends about me. The few times she met them at Davis’ she introduced me like a fuckin’ prize or somethin’. They knew more about me than I did about them, and it wasn’t bullshit things. She bragged on me every chance…” Mary looked down at his hands. “So why is it now she can’t even look at me; like I’ve disappointed her, like I’m worthless?”_ _

__Jan wasn’t sure he actually wanted an answer, so she sat there a moment, waiting for him to continue. She had so much to say, but she had already done enough damage with her assumptions the night before. It was Mary’s turn to speak in the most candid way he chose._ _

__“I knew something was changing between us when I moved in, but I did it anyway. I thought, maybe if she has weird habits or some stupid shit, it would kill these feelings…but it only made things worse.” He let out a deep breath. “So I’ve been holding my breath, waiting for some sign, knowing deep down that I would never be good enough for someone like Wendy. I fuck stuff up just because. I hurt before I can be hurt, and I never let myself be close to anyone…expect for her. So when I finally kissed her after two fuckin’ long years, I knew I couldn’t pretend anymore, even if it cost me everything. It wasn’t about just fucking someone. It was about being with the one person I wanted more than anything in the whole fuckin’ world.”_ _

__Jan squeezed his shoulder as he wiped his eyes again, tears filling them just as quickly as they would fall again._ _

__“And now that person can’t even look me in the eye. That person wants to pretend it never happened…and that fuckin’ hurts, man.”_ _

__After another bout of lengthy silence, Jan just couldn’t hold it any. She had to speak before the world fell apart._ _

__“I don’t even know where to begin, Mare, but I can tell you one thing right now.” Jan looked at him, prompting Mary to shift his gaze in her direction. “Yo _mare _good enough for someone like Wendy; sure, you weren’t ready for someone like her years ago and I wasn’t ready for someone like Jack either. But people can change and evolve into better versions of themselves…and me and you, we did.”___ _

____Mary bit his lip and turned his attention back to the lukewarm coffee._ _ _ _

____“You could’ve just fucked her and moved on, but you took your time getting to know how wonderful she is, and she did the same. When Dee met you she had come out of a super shitty relationship just half a year before and trust was not in her ability, but something about you made her want to try.”_ _ _ _

____“I’ve known Dee a year longer than you and I saw that breakup happen. I saw the shell she was left with afterwards. Then, I witnessed this change in her, I saw her smile again because Mary Goore made her laugh about something stupid; and I was beside myself. I didn’t like it at first, especially with how you previously were. I didn’t want her to get hurt…but you proved me wrong. You cared for and protected her so fiercely.”_ _ _ _

____Mary knew all of this was true. Though Dee didn’t talk about her breakup, it was obviously something that had changed her, made her into less than herself when they first met. He never couldn’t understand how someone could be so cruel to treat her so poorly, especially with how good and kind she was. Still though as much as he knew and believed this, his past engulfed him and reminded him of what he used to be. There was no way he could be good enough for her with a past like that. She deserved more than he could ever give. She deserved a doctor or a lawyer type, someone who could support her and whisk her away on exotic trips…Mary could never do that, not with the way his life was going at this point. Things were comfortable, sure, more comfortable than they had ever been, but that’s all._ _ _ _

____“I will always care about her, Jan, but she and I are on different pages now. I want something more and I know I can’t have it. I made my choice and I accept the consequences, even though it cost me everything. I just wish it would stop hurting so fuckin’ much.” Mary began to slur his words as he sat the coffee cup on the table, his eyes so droopy he almost missed the glass._ _ _ _

____“Why don’t you go upstairs and take a nap, Mare; we’ve talked enough for now.” Jan encouraged though she wasn’t so sure he could even make it to the second floor. Sleep crept up and hit him like a ton a bricks from the sheer emotional exhaustion; and the lack of sleep didn’t help._ _ _ _

____Mary pulled himself together enough to get to his room before literally dropping face first onto the bed. He didn’t even take his boots off before diving into the deepest sleep, thankfully dreaming of nothingness._ _ _ _


	15. when the party's over

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Just a little warning, there is a somewhat violent dream sequence involving being buried alive. If that might bother you, the chunk is italicized, so hopefully it's easy to spot and skip.
> 
> Also, this story has been placed in a series. After completion there will be random one offs over time.

Wendy cried herself to sleep on the couch, snuggled against Mary’s favorite Halloween pillow, covered in that same mint green blanket that had protected them from the cold just days before when they had napped together. The pillow and blanket still smelled faintly of his knock off Gorgieo Armani and cigarettes. Even though it made her cry, she wrapped herself up in desperation just needing a hint of his essence to make herself feel okay. The hangover was a punishment all its own but the deathly ache in her chest made her want to die. 

She woke later that night, half expecting Mary to be sitting on the far end of the couch, her feet propped up in his lap while he watched some stupid reality tv show. Alas, she was surrounded by nothing but darkness and deafening silence. Her stomach growling was the only sound in this newly spacious place. It was too late to order out, but Dee had to eat something to get rid of these last few hours of a hangover before work the next day. 

Pushing herself up off the couch, the blanket still wrapped around, Dee walked to the kitchen and rummaged through the cabinets and fridge before making a simple sandwich. Eating seemed like the biggest task, but Dee made herself finish every bite before getting ready for bed. Again, she hoped this was just a terrible dream and Mary would be waiting in her bed to watch their nightly movie. When she turned the corner, she only saw ghosts of what used to be. A once curious green eyed man was now replaced with a pillow and blanket. 

Unable to deal with the memories creeping in, Dee took some over the counter sleep meds and soon fell into a deep sleep with hopes that she wouldn’t wake again until morning. 

_…Dream Sequence…_

_“Mary, please don’t do this!” Dee pleaded as she stood beside a freshly dug burial plot. It was daylight and she was wearing a beautiful black dress and matching heels._

_“I have to Wendy.” He stepped closer, surprisingly wearing a black suit and dress shoes. He’d never looked so ‘normal’. “You just aren’t good enough, you never were. I got what I wanted and now I’m throwing you away like I should have a long fuckin’ time ago.”_

_“But I…I love you.” Her lips quivered as the tears tricked down her face and neck, mascara surely making a mess of her cheeks. “Please, I can be good, I can be what you need.”_

_“Sorry, baby doll, you’re just like all the rest of ‘em. I don’t do feelings, you know that. You couldn’t just fuck me and get over it like the others, so now you have to go.”_

_Before Wendy could react, Mary reached out and shoved her back into the burial plot with a loud thud at her landing. She couldn’t breathe to speak as he grabbed a shovel and poured the first bits of dirt onto her dress._

_“You’re better off for this, Wendy, trust me.” Mary spoke one last time as she blinked, and the dirt began to fill around her rapidly. “Goodbye, baby doll.”_

_The gaze of his green eyes seared into her brain before the last scoop of dirt covered her face… ___

__Wendy shot up in the middle of her bed, gasping for even the smallest breath of air as she rubbed over her body, sure there was some remnant of dirt on her shirt. It felt so real, the touch, the smell, the wind that had kissed her face before he shoved her in. Once she realized it was in fact just a terrible dream, she broke down in a puddle of tears, recounting his harsh words._ _

__She couldn’t be awake and not think about him and she couldn’t sleep to escape. Barely twenty-four hours and this was her new life. It’s as if she was mourning a death, but she wasn’t sure who’s or what’s. Wendy just knew no matter what she would never be the same again. There was no time to think about that though, she was going to be late for her first client if she didn’t pull herself together enough to shower and get ready._ _

__It was agonizing listening to other people’s problems while her mind was a million miles away. Wendy caught herself having to ask clients repeat themselves multiple times throughout a session. Normally she was interested and engaged at the thought of helping someone over a hurdle in their life, but now she could care less about anything but Mary and worrying about whether or not he was safe and well._ _

__By the end of the day Wendy had looked at her phone so much between clients it was dead. She closed her office without even cleaning up the stack of notes on the desk. It was more a wreck than normal, but she didn’t care._ _

__Needing something, anything to take the edge off, she stopped by the grocery store and grabbed a few bottles of red wine and on a whim, a pack of cigarettes, Mary’s favorite brand and style. She wasn’t a smoker, only on occasion if Mary offered it to her; but here she was sitting on the patio a bottle of wine in one hand and a lit cigarette balanced in the other._ _

__“Why couldn’t he love me?” She asked aloud as she sniffled for the millionth time before wiping her face on the sleeve of the dress shirt. “Why couldn’t I be good enough; I can help hundreds of people with their problems, but I can’t even find a solution for my own…what kind of therapist am I really?”_ _

__The more she pondered on her life, the less worthy she felt of Mary, of Jan, of everything good in her safe little world. She wanted nothing more than to call Mary up and beg him to offer a solution again. She would talk about it this time, figure it out just to have him back home where he belonged…alas, she couldn’t bring herself to do it. Maybe this was Mary’s backwards, what he thought was polite, way, of leaving. Yeah, that’s what it was. Who was Wendy to try and change his mind? If she begged him, how could she be sure he really wanted to be there if he chose to reconcile?_ _

__Eventually she smoked half the pack of cigarettes and drank the whole bottle by herself before retiring to bed to have yet another nightmare…_ _

__On the other side of town Mary had woken up at midnight and sat on the balcony off from his room, overlooking the sleepy suburban community surrounding Jan and Jack’s spiffy home._ _

__He caught himself humming a stupid song from Ghost. The only one he seemed to like, but this time it just pissed him off. It had been stuck in his head between the ghostly memories of the last two years. In the middle of this, he wondered what Wendy was doing, and if she was hurting too…_ _

__“When is this going to stop hurting so fuckin’ bad?” Mary exhaled a spell of spoke from between his perfect pale pink lips._ _

__“Knock, knock…” Jan could be heard from the doorway. “Can I come in?”_ _

__“It’s your house.” Mary smirked. “Sure, but this is your room right now.” Jan smirked right back before walking through the room the join him on the balcony._ _

__“Smoke?” He held out the pack._ _

__“Thank you.” She smiled and happily accepted. They stood there in silence through half a cigarette before Jan asked how he was doing._ _

__“I’m just gonna lie to the both of us and say I’m just fine.” He shrugged and took another deep drag._ _

__“Mary...”_ _

__“Hm?”_ _

__“Just…what if things were different; what if she felt the same way you do; what if she thought you were more than enough for her…would you go back?” Jan looked ahead at the street below._ _

__“That would never happen.” He snorted._ _

__“But if it did…work with me here.”_ _

__Mary thought for a moment, his throat tightening at this daydream._ _

__“Fuck yeah I’d go back…in a heartbeat.” He finally spoke as he squished his finished cigarette into the ashtray._ _

__“OK.” Jan nodded._ _

__“Why?” Mary looked over at her. “What does it matter when all is said and done?”_ _

__“Nothing is ever truly said and done, Mare, not when dealing with the matters of the heart.”_ _

__“But this _is _.” He shook his head. “I’m gonna go grab the rest of my stuff and put it in storage tomorrow, then I’ll probably crash at Al’s for a while before getting a place of my own.”___ _

____“Stay here this week, take some time to think and decompress, please…” Jan looked with a pleading expression. “Just this week, OK?”_ _ _ _

____Truthfully he didn’t want to stay with Al anyway. The dude was almost forty and still living life like a washed up rock star. Mary didn’t really miss that life anymore and thinking about going back to it even for a temporary stay gave him anxiety after having it so good living with Wendy._ _ _ _

____“Alright.” Mary nodded._ _ _ _

____“I’m going to Wendy’s tomorrow to drop off her gear from the show, so if you need anything I’ll grab it for you; but hold off on getting everything right now, give Wendy some time because I’m sure she isn’t feeling so great either.”_ _ _ _

____“I don’t need anything.” Mary shook his head and looked away, entirely ignoring the rest of her words. He honestly had no intention of getting his things because that would make all of this real and he wasn’t ready to face the truth just yet. It was all angry bullshit talk, even Jan knew that, but she wasn’t going to call him out on it…_ _ _ _


	16. Lost Without You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wine, heartache, stupid miscommunication...the new life of Mary and Wendy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the second of two chapters posted today on 11/27

The next day it was all the same, Wendy woke from another haunting nightmare proving just how worthless she was in the eyes of Mary and everyone she loved. A headache from a wine infused hangover, and a dry throat from all the cigarettes she smoked. Today was a half day though, just like every Tuesday, except she wouldn’t be having lunch before seeing Mary off to his shift at the bar…she would be alone with her miserable thoughts, wine, and cigarettes. 

Wendy barely made it through her day and even broke the speed limit driving through the town, hoping to get pulled over just to feel something else besides heartbreak. Adrenaline, anxiety, anything. However, she skated through without a ticket, but lucky for her a new pack of cigarettes. 

Wendy let out a deep breath as she closed the front door behind her, clutching the pack between her fingers so tightly they were almost half smashed when she stepped further inside examining the emptiness of the space. She needed noise, something, anything, so she made her way to the record player in the corner. She didn’t just need noise, Wendy needed to hear his voice again. Finding bittersweet comfort in the only thing she knew, she searched for his previous bands only record and popped it on the turntable. 

Her smile upon hearing his guttural screams quickly faded as she remembered listening to this with him upon many occasions. He would always point out every single flaw and laughed at Wendy’s attempt to decipher the lyrics. Then later he would catch her humming what lyrics she could actually understand. Another thing that made him fall further in love with her, the fact that she took the time to really listen. 

The memory slipping past her, Wendy grabbed a bottle of chilled wine and walked to her room, to change. Dressed in her usual t-shirt and panties combo, Dee opened her window and sat on the ledge before shoving a fresh cigarette between her lips. This bottle of wine was stubborn to open but after a few twists the cork popped with ease and the glass rim quickly found its way to her lips. 

The cigarette and cheap red wine combo wasn’t the most pleasant, but she didn’t care. It was just enough to knock the edge off and that’s all she needed right then. 

Three tracks in and Jan arrived at her front door prepared to knock until she heard faint rumbling of all too familiar music. She didn’t even bother knocking, knowing it would fall on nothing, but black metal filled ears. It didn’t matter anyway the door was unlocked. Jan kind of wondered if Wendy left it unlocked with hopes of Mary coming home. There wasn’t much time to think about it though when she finally pushed the door open to an empty living room, all but the sound of Mary’s voice blaring through the speakers. 

Everything looked mostly untouched as she sat Wendy’s guitar case on the couch before walking down the hall to her opened door. 

There on the window seal, Wendy sat with her second cigarette, clutching the partially drank bottle of wine as she looked out the window at the empty street. Her mascara soaked cheeks gave her away as the black liquid makeup stain her skin with each sniffle. 

“Wendy…” Jan knocked on the doorframe. She shouldn’t hear her though, not over the intense metal thrashing around in ear ears. Knowing it was no use, Jan walked over quietly and waved a hand in front of her face. 

“Fuck!” Wendy sprang up from her spot almost dropping the bottle into a shattered mess. “Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you, Dee.” Jan looked around awkwardly. 

“It’s OK.” Dee sighed before squished her cigarette into the newly used ashtray. “let me go turn all that off.” 

She disappeared and the music along with her. 

“Sorry about freaking out on you, couldn’t really hear much else with all that…” Wendy laughed sheepishly as she walked back into her bedroom where Jan sat in the same chair as Mary days before. 

“It’s OK, I shouldn’t have come unannounced, but I wanted to bring your guitar back, figured you were missing it.” 

“Haven’t felt much like playing lately.” Wendy shrugged before taking a swig of wine as she sat on the bed. 

She didn’t even bother to wipe her falling tears, what was the point in hiding it anymore? Jan knew her almost as good as Mary seemed to before, and there was no way she could lie about it. 

“How you been feeling?” Jan asked as Dee passed the wine bottle her way. “Like hell…some nightmares, hangovers, barely eating.” 

“Have…have you—never mind.” She shook her head. “He’s at my house right now if that’s what you’re wondering.” 

“Oh.” Wendy nodded. 

“I’m not worried about him right now though. I’m worried about you.” Jan sighed before handing the bottle back to her. “You don’t drink this much and you sure as hell don’t smoke like this…so what’s going on?” 

Wendy looked down at the mostly drank bottle for a moment as tears clouded her irritated vision. Before she could stop the words they slipped out. 

“I miss him so much.” She cried. “Everywhere I look he’s there, the memories stay with me every step…and all I can think is no matter what I could’ve done differently, I would never be good enough for him. I couldn’t be this sexy, tall, thin, fuck-all attitude kind of woman who could fuck around without feelings. I couldn’t be as cool as his friends…and I’m sure he regrets our night together, now that it cost a friendship.” 

“I want to hate him; I want to hate him so I can stop loving him.” Dee continued to sob. “I just don’t want to hurt anymore. I thought I would never care for someone again after David, and then this guy who was so rough around the edges, but just as sweet in his own way, waltzes into my life. He leaves me speechless a lot of the time. He shows me new things; and he makes me believe in some of the goodness still left in the world.” 

Jan could feel tears bouncing around in her own eyes, realizing how much a failure there was to communicate between them. One wanted the other just as desperately.

“Tell me something, Dee,” Jan sniffled. “what if things were different; what if he felt the way you do too? What if he thought you were more than enough for him…would you tell him and try to make something of it?”

“But it’s not different.” Wendy sighed deeply. 

“Just appease me, alright, say it was…then what?” 

“Yeah,” Dee sniffled. “I’d tell him, now that I know just how much it already hurts the way things are…but it doesn’t matter much now, he’s gone forever. I don’t have that chance.” 

“Why don’t you call him?” Jan suggested. 

“No way.” Dee shook her head. “I can’t, not now…he left for a reason and I suspect this was his easiest way out to let me down and let go to not embarrass me further.” 

Jan bit her tongue so hard it almost bled as she looked down at her hands. She was practically foaming at the mouth to tell Wendy everything Mary had said, but it wasn’t right just yet. They needed to find their way back to each other on their own. This wasn’t something Jan could just do, not when they were both wounded and missing each other like a couple of idiots over miscommunication. 

The somber mood carried through the rest of their conversation about everything but Mary. A couple of hours later Jan was gone back to check on Mary after picking up dinner on the way. 

Left a sobbing mess, Dee polished off the bottle, pretty buzzed as she sat it in the kitchen sink before walking back down the hall. 

“Why do I have to miss you so much.” She sighed quietly as she walked across and placed her hand on Mary’s door. “Why did you have to leave me like this; why couldn’t things be different?” 

Needing to be nearer to anything of his, Wendy twisted the knob and pushed the white framed door open. 

She looked around this unique room belonging to the man who held her heart. It wasn’t as big as hers, but still close. His bed, a queen sized with dark green sheets and a matching comforter rested against the furthest corner of room, while a desk and set of dressers sat across from it. A few framed movie and band posters were tacked up giving the tan walls something to hold. A pile of clothes sat at the end of his bed, some he hadn’t folded yet, and a few pairs of sneakers and boots rested against a free wall beside his record player, bookshelf and guitar stand. It was the perfect bachelor set up. 

Wendy took a deep breath, inhaling that familiar scent of him as her feet carried her further into the room. Before she could realize it, she was standing by his bed, running her fingers over the crinkled sheets pretending he was just underneath them within her grasp, ready to be woken up for his shift. 

“Mary…” She half whispered before throwing the sheets back to flop on the bed and dive her face into the fabric. But just as she made her way on the bed, she heard something drop onto the floor, it sounded like paper or a deck of cards hitting hard against the wood. 

“What the hell?” Wendy furrowed her brows; but ended in quiet laughter. “Probably a fuckin’ Playboy.” 

It wasn’t a Playboy; it was a green envelope addressed to Wendy. With it in hand, she laid back on the bed and held it above her, thinking about what must be in there. Maybe it was just a silly holiday card or a gift card for her birthday…as she knew, Mary wasn’t one to write letters to anyone. The only thing he wrote was lyrics and it was usually chicken scratch because he couldn’t get the pen going as quickly as his mind. 

“I have no business…” She reminded herself and clutched the green envelop against her chest as she closed her eyes for a moment. However, that didn’t stop Wendy from thinking about what was inside. Her curiosity would not rest until she knew. And what did it really matter anyway? Mary was gone and he would only come back long enough to grab his stuff before disappearing from her life for good. Well, they hadn’t talked so who knew if he would still want to be in the band, as if they could get along well enough to perform together…

None of that mattered right then, what mattered was what curious things laid within this green envelope that Dee was currently ripping open. It was a funny little Halloween card with a cute black cat on the front. That wasn’t what caught her attention though, it was the crème colored paper so neatly folded inside. Her heart pounded as she unfolded and smoothed it out, trying to steady her breathing enough to read. 

The date on this paper was marked in the top right corner of the morning he left, and that was enough to make her even more curious than before.


	17. The Letter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ah, the letter...

_Dee,_

_I’ve written this letter too many times to count over the last year. I write it and I seal it up with the hope that I’ll have balls to give it to you. Every holiday goes by, the perfect card and letter along with it into the trash. My words are never good enough, I am never good enough. I know I never will be. But I love you, dammit. You are the best friend I’ve ever had, and you made it so easy to love you even when I tried to refuse._

_We have seen each other through the best stuff and the worst. Experiencing life with you has been the best thing that has ever happened to me. I know I’m probably not the kind of guy you’d ever want. I have my own share of problems. But I need you to know that I fucking love you. I love the way you laugh at my stupid jokes or some shitty movie. I love the way you curl up against me on the couch after a bad day at work. I love that every holiday with you is a month-long thing. I love the music we make together. I love everything about you and the life we’ve got. I just want you to know that I don’t expect a reply from you not now, not ever. Life has been crazy lately, especially with the shows and shit. And I didn’t want to add to that stress for you. But I’ve got to get this off my chest. That night when we fucked for the first time, I was nervous (yes, I know, Mary Goore doesn’t get nervous or scared). But I was. I was nervous I’d fuck up and I’ve never cared about that before with anyone else. It wasn’t just fucking for me, it felt like something. Like a connection or some shit. Now, here we are two days later, and you can barely look at me. I’ve tried to talk to you, tell you what I’m thinking. I’ve tried to understand what I might have done wrong, to make you feel so disgusted. But now, I guess I’m letting you turn me away. I’m not good enough. I never have been. But, honestly, right now, all I want to do is walk into your room and wrap my arms around you. I’d never let you go if I did. It doesn’t matter though. I don’t get a do over, I don’t get to tell you how I feel. I let it go too long and now our friendship is another casualty. Life doesn’t always grant second chances. It sucks a bag of dicks, but that’s just part of it, I guess. And I know the chances of you finding this are slim to nothing, but I needed to say this before I go and leave you with some peace you seem to want. I love you and I need you to know._

_Mary,  
XO ___


	18. The Call

Wendy stared at the wrinkled page for the longest time, re-reading the final sentence. _I love you and I need you to know. _It’s as if she could hear Mary reciting the entire letter in her head, his voice seeming so close, yet so far. How could he think he wasn’t good enough for her? Wendy had believed all this time that she was the one entirely unworthy of the love she assumed he didn’t have for her. She was the one who pushed him away to avoid the pain that could have been entirely avoided if they had just communicated properly. He tried; he really did. If she had just agreed to talk about that night, maybe, just maybe, he’d be there in his bed, holding her the way he professed in this letter.__

__How could she be so damn stupid? How could she be so selfish only thinking of herself? How could she still be so wounded and guarded after years of breaking down walls with the one person who she trusted most? How could she not see what was right in front of her this entire time? Wendy continued to think back on all the kind things he did for her, things a friend wouldn’t just do. She thought about the times they cuddled through the cold weather, the early morning greetings in bed with coffee and a pastry that he gotten up early to grab at their favorite bakery when it opened at some ungodly hour. He was practically announcing it in the smallest ways for the last year, and she had completely missed every single move._ _

__Wendy felt even more undeserving than before, but she knew deep down that they couldn’t go on this way aimlessly wandering through life thinking on what could have been had they both not been so damn stupid…well, had Wendy not been so damn stupid._ _

__She rubbed her fingers over the last few words and pulled herself from bed as a new trickle of tears covered her cheeks. She couldn’t do this anymore, not without Mary by her side. If he was brave enough to write out his feelings, then she had to be brave enough to say it._ _

__Moving to the couch in the living room, Wendy grabbed her cell and scrolled through her recent calls to find his contact, which wasn’t far from the top. It seemed to ring forever, eventually going to voicemail._ _

__‘You’ve reached the voicemail of _“Ah man, how the fuck does this thing even work?! Fuck it, oh, um…Mary Goore?” _leave a message after the beep. When you’re finished recording, please hang up or dial one for more options.”___ _

____Wendy giggled and sobbed as she listened to this silly little recording that he refused to change. Two years later and he still never bothered to care about it or checking voicemails. It was unlikely he would find it, but in the off chance he did, well, he would know._ _ _ _

____‘BEEP’_ _ _ _

____“Mary, um…” Wendy’s throat clinched around her words as she sobbed for a moment. “Please…call me when you get this, I miss you so much and damn it—”_ _ _ _

____Before she could finish, she ran out of time._ _ _ _

____“Son of a bitch.” She grumbled before calling again, hoping this time he wouldn’t answer…and he didn’t. “Mary…I…I love you; there, I said it, and I need _you _to know that, alright?”___ _ _ _

______Call number three…_ _ _ _ _ _

______“I know you probably hate me now and I guess I’ll learn to live with that, but I do fucking love you and I hope you’ll come home one day.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______After a few minutes Wendy sits back on the couch, sobering up at the realization of what she had just done. Her heart began to pound ever harder as anxiety sucked her lungs dry. Her chest began to heave while her skin tingled. The panic set in and soon she was a ball on the floor, riding through an unexpected panic attack._ _ _ _ _ _

______Wendy hadn’t experienced a panic attack strong enough to draw her fingers since she was a teenager; and mixed with lack of sleep and the previous depressant effects of wine, she was practically paralyzed in the same position for a good half an hour._ _ _ _ _ _

______Meanwhile, Mary was on the other side of town, just sitting down to eat with Jan while Jack was working late again on another case. With the fast food plated on fine china, he and Jan moved to the dining room after grabbing a couple of sodas. The silence plagued them for a moment, that same elephant in the room, larger than life. Mary wanted to know everything; he wanted to know how she was doing. If she missed him..._ _ _ _ _ _

______He wasn’t going to be the first to bring it up, not this time. He was steadfast on being the stubborn one now, at least he thought._ _ _ _ _ _

______Jan was practically bubbling over with all this information bouncing around in her brain, but she wanted to know that Mary actually even cared to know at this point. He seemed to sullen, so increasingly content on being the bitter man he used to be._ _ _ _ _ _

______“She’s smoking…” Jan finally spoke, unable to contain her mouth._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Huh?” Mary looked up._ _ _ _ _ _

______“She’s smoking…and drinking, a lot.” She bit her lip and looked away, afraid of what Mary might say._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Dee doesn’t smoke.” Mary shook his head. “Well, not usually...”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Today she was halfway through a pack of cigarettes and bottle of wine by the time I left her.” Jan shrugged as Mary furrowed his brows and looked down at his plate again, trying to make sense of it all. “What, did you think she was just going to have some grand party to celebrate you disappearing?”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Well…”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Mary, she’s lost without you—”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“I don’t want to talk about it, Jan; we’ve been over this before.” Mary huffed. “She made her choice when she let me leave without a fight.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Wait, wait, wait, that’s what this is about?” Jan raised her voice. “You think she should have fought for you?”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Mary just looked at her, not really sure of anything going on in his brain anymore._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Mary, I know you’ve never really had a committed intimate relationship with anyone, at least not in the last ten years or so, but I’m going to tell you now.” Jan let out a breath, trying to calm her voice. “It isn’t always fifty-fifty. Sometimes one person has to fight more than the other. Sometimes one person is so scared they can’t articulate what they want to say, they can’t shield themselves for their fears, and that’s when you…um, the other person, I mean, needs to step in and talk them through it with a patient heart. Jack and I didn’t just decide one day that we were going to have the best relationship, we had to fight for it.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Mary listened to every word, fighting with his overly stubborn nature to understand Jan’s heartfelt conversation. It wasn’t easy for her, this transition with Jack, and Mary knew that. She was the only person to understand what he was going through with Wendy, and words carried the weight._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Jack is my Wendy, he helped me become a better version of me…and I will always love him for all that he went through; supporting me, caring for me, loving me when I didn’t love myself…but sometimes, even now, he needs me to be the strong one—”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Before Jan could say anything else, Mary’s phone began to vibrate in his pocket._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Check it.” Jan bit her lip in anticipation._ _ _ _ _ _

______Wendy’s name flashed across the screen along with voicemail notifications.  
“It’s, uh, it’s voicemails…from her.” Mary swallowed hard, his heart beating faster as his fingers lingered over the touchscreen, afraid to press play. _ _ _ _ _ _

______“Well, check them then!” Jan encouraged. “Listen to what she has to say, might clear some things up.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Biting his lip, he clicked on the first one before promptly pressing the phone to his ear._ _ _ _ _ _

_______“Mary, um…” _He could hear that dreaded pause with a heavy sob following. _“Please…call me when you get this, I miss you so much and damn it—”___ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________She missed him? She actually missed him? Wendy seemed so angry, so erratic that he truly assumed she was finished. That wasn’t up for debate though as he moved on to the next one…_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

___________“Mary…I…I love you; there, I said it, and I need you to know that, alright?” _____ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________Mary’s heart practically exploded in his chest at hearing her profess the one thing they’d both been dying to say. He realized then that she had found his letter, meaning she had been in his room, likely laying on his bed. But how could she love someone like him? How could she want someone like him?_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________Call number three…_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_____________“I know you probably hate me now and I guess I’ll learn to live with that, but I fucking love you and I hope you’ll come home one day.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________The tears danced in his eyes as he pulled the phone away from his face and looked down at the lit screen._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________“Wha-what is, Mare?” Jan asked curiously, watching him jump up from the table and wipe his eyes as a smile crept onto his lips._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________“I have to go!” Mary grinned. “I have to go get the girl, _my _girl…”___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________He stood there a moment more, mulling over the fact that she loved him, that she cried for him, that she missed the one person who loved her just as much. Was he really that lucky?_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________“Well what are you standing here for then?” Jan practically yelled. “Get your ass out of here and get her!”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________“Yeah…right…uh, if she calls here, tell her I’m on my way, OK?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________“Sure, yeah, be safe, Goore and don’t hold back.” Jan followed him into the living room. “Tell her everything you’ve ever wanted to say, and then tell me all about it later!”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________Mary flashed that adorable crooked grin one last time as he slipped his leather jacket on and disappeared out the door…on his way to get _his _girl.___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _


	19. The Accident

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Warning* Depiction of an automobile accident, injury and treatment.

Before he even backed out of the drive, Mary scrolled through his phone and hit the recall, hoping he could…well, he wasn’t really sure what he was hoping for. Mary didn’t even know what to say at this point. His heart was beating in his ears, through his whole body. He just wanted to be near her again. Three days apart felt like an agonizing eternity, something he never wanted to experience ever again. 

After ringing a few times, the call went to her voicemail. Any other time he would’ve hung up and called right back, but just in case she was busy, or maybe her phone died, he actually left a message. 

“Hi, this is Wendy,” Her voice sounded so cheerful, like she had been smiling since the first word. “Seems that you’ve missed me, so, leave your name and a message and I promise to get back to you as soon as I can…thank you!” 

Mary grinned as he looked down at the phone for a moment, waiting for the beep. 

“Hey, it’s Mary…I mean, you already knew that, duh. Anyway, I got your messages, baby doll.” 

Message two…Mary was just as annoyed by these timed messages as Wendy had previously been.

“I’m on my way home right now. I’ll see you soon, and we can talk about everything…but only if you want to.” He paused as he backed out of the drive. “…I love you, Wendy.” 

A pang of anxiety hit his stomach as he thought about the many reasons she didn’t answer his calls. However, he hadn’t realized that a denied update on his phone caused a glitch, keeping him from sending a call, only voicemails. Though he could have never been prepared for the gnarly panic attack Wendy had just worked herself through. 

Trying to take his mind of the possibilities, he decided to recite just what he would say to her as he drove through their little city. The sun just beginning to set, with the sky in a beautiful orange and pink swirl. 

“Look, I think maybe we just had a big fuckin miscommunication. I love you, baby doll, I always have.” Mary grumbled at his words and huffed. “Get it together, Goore, seriously. You sound soft and stupid.” 

“Dee, I fuckin’ love you, alright…” Again he grumbled. “Why does this have to be so fuckin’ hard? Why can’t I just say what I think?” 

“Wendy…” He paused at a four way for a moment, just one car ahead of him as he thought long and hard. Another moment passed and he pondered, still keeping his eyes on his surroundings. “I…I just love you, baby doll.” Mary shrugged with an honest smile as he took his turn at the stop. 

“Yeah, that—” Before he could say much else, Mary looked to his left to see two headlights barreling their way towards him with no intention of stopping. 

Time felt like slow-motion, this white car hitting just a few inches back from his door, crumpling the metal like paper, while the glass shattered across his lap. Mary tried to brace himself gripping the steering wheel as the airbags deployed forcefully, just short of breaking his nose. All he could think about was Wendy and how she would never truly know the way he had felt all this time; their two years together flashed before him, beautiful memories he was glad to relieve while fading away from this terrible moment. 

The force of his car being whipped around cause his head to bounce against the leather interior of his door, a blow he just couldn’t sustain. His last thought of Wendy smiling and ghosting her lips under his eye faded into nothingness as his body went limp. Mary remained in this state of darkness as the cars stopped moving and his torso slumped forward, resting against the steering wheel. 

Meanwhile, after more than half an hour on the floor, Wendy was finally able to sit upright against the couch, her breathing slow and deep as she grabbed her phone to look at it, only to see an empty screen. She dragged herself up off the floor and mad her way to the bathroom, determined to wash away the panic and cigarette smoke from the last three days. She needed something to make her feel normal and alive, but she couldn’t do that without making one last call. 

“Wendy, hey! Mary make it there yet?” Jan spoke cheerfully. “What are you talking about, Mary isn’t here.” Wendy furrowed her brows and looked around the room before turning the faucet on to a perfect temperature. 

“He left here about half an hour ago, said he was coming home after hearing your messages…didn’t let me hear them, of course, but whatever you said…it did something for him.” 

“I told him how I felt…in so few words, of course, but I did.” Wendy bit her lip as the tears began to pool around her eyes again. “He said…he said he was coming home?” 

“Should be there any minute, probably got held up in traffic or decided to be all sappy and buy some flowers or some shit…you never know what Mary might do.” Jan smiled. “Just give him a few more minutes, I’m sure he’ll be there soon.” 

Wendy swallowed hard as a small smile tugged at her lips. 

“Jan, I don’t even know what I’ll say when he gets here…what if I can’t say anything, what if I freeze?” 

“You don’t always have to use words, Dee…sometimes we can show people how we feel, you know?” Jan smirked and pulled a small chuckle from Wendy. “Yeah, I suppose…but what if he doesn’t—” 

“Trust me, he will; just do or say what comes natural, OK?” 

The conversation was short and sweet, and left Wendy a bundle of excited nerves as she hurried into her bath with no clue that the man she waited for was just being cut out of his car. 

“Sir! Sir! C’mon, open those eyes!” A blurred voice pulled Mary back to the surface; his vision hazed as his eyes fluttered open. 

“Mmm…” He groaned and tried to look around for a moment, barely remembering what had happened. “Don’t move your neck, man, gotta keep your body stable, alright?” The voice spoke again, the source being an EMT.

Mary tried to blink away the haze as his senses faded in and out. 

“Hey man, stay with me.” That voice pulled him back. “My name is Daniel, what’s yours?” The EMT asked as others around him worked to cut the metal, a sound that Mary would never forget. 

“M-Mary.” 

“It’s good to meet you, Mary.” The EMT offered a friendly smile, though he thought the name was strange. “Anything hurting right now?” 

“Everything.” Mary tried to huff a laughed that only ended in a groan as he held his arm. “Keep it against your chest as still as you can, and we’ll have a sling for you as soon as we get you, alright.” 

“Mmmhm.” Mary groaned again. 

All the metallic sounds began to fade into one another, the scraping and popping unlike anything he’d ever heard. It was like a jolt of reality for some strange reason, reminding him of where he was going. Just as soon as they slid his body onto the board and placed a brace around his neck, and sling around his arm, Mary began to panic. 

“Wendy!” He tried to sit up. “Call Wendy!” 

“You need to settle down, sir, just take a few breaths.” A petite blond lady spoke with a calm voice as he was moved to the stretcher in the ambulance. 

“She’s my family, she needs to know!” Mary yelled again pushing her hands away as he tried to sit up. 

The woman remined calm as she and Daniel, the nice EMT from earlier, worked to wrapped restrains across his body, effectively keeping him in place, to avoid further injury. This only made Mary more erratic, his heart beating dangerously as he spouted out Wendy’s phone number, one he knew by heart. 

So caught up in the adrenaline coursing heavily through his veins, Mary failed to notice the woman slip a needle into his arm, administering a sedative to calm him. Within moments Mary’s breathing began to slow, and the world became a haze again as they continued checking his vitals and paperwork. 

“Wendy…” He slurred. “Call Wendy…f-fam-ily…” 

Again, the world went black for poor Mary, fading back into nothingness.


	20. The Hospital

Fifteen minutes had passed, and the anxiety set in. After getting out of the bath, Wendy dressed and paced around their apartment, calling Mary’s phone, only for it go straight to voicemail every single time. Her heart dropped to her stomach as that tingly feeling began to bubble on her chest, threatening a debilitating fit of panic. Just as she was about to call Jan, her phone rang; a number she didn’t recognize. 

“Hello?” 

“Hi, Wendy?” The older female voice on the other line spoke calmly. 

“Yes…who am I speaking with?” 

“Wendy, my name is Diana; I am a nurse at Brutton View Memorial…” 

Wendy instantly felt every hair on her body stand to attention as her stomach sloshed with worry and anticipation. 

“Mary was in an accident and he named you his next of kin.” The nurse spoke, though her words barely translated as Wendy grabbed her purse and keys before running out the door. “What relation are you to Mary?” 

“He is my roommate…my—my…” 

“Partner?” Nurse Diana asked. 

“Sort of.” Wendy tried to breathe through her panic as she started her car. “Is…is he OK?” 

“I cannot disclose the condition of the patient, I’m sorry.” She continued in her calm voice. “Assuming you will be coming to the hospital, he is currently being assessed in the ER. It is on first floor. The doctor will be able to tell you more when you get here.” 

“Please just tell me something…anything—” 

“I’m sorry, ma’am, I wish I could tell you more, but patient confidentiality prevents that. The doctor will fill you in, I promise…please be safe traveling.” 

Wendy thanked her for what little information the nurse could give; and started on her way. 

She recounted the last few days, her heart pounding out of her chest as the words from his letter rang in her ears. She couldn’t lose him, not after all they had been through. How could it end like this? A fucking car accident taking away the one person she truly ever loved, right after she professed her love to him in a stupid voicemail…was this the universes sick way of teaching her a lesson about timing and communication? 

“I don’t even know where to start.” Wendy sniffled as she spoke aloud. “God…Satan…the universe, whatever, whoever, please…I never ask for anything, just _please, please, please _don’t take him from me. I’ll do anything, anything at all just to keep him. He deserves a good life. He deserves to be loved and cared for. Let me be the one. If this is a lesson on timing or shitty communication, I promise I’ll be quicker, I’ll say what’s on my mind, or at least I’ll try too…” She paused again, violently sobbing as she pulled up to a red light.__

__“Please don’t take him from me!”_ _

__Trying her best to make peace with this possible unknown force, Wendy was surprised she made it in one piece, barely being able to see through the blur of tears as she pulled into the parking lot._ _

__The neon sign for the hospital glowed in blue and white, seeming much more festive for Christmas than Halloween. Wendy could’ve cared less as she sprinted to the automatic sliding doors and searched around the front hall for an ER sign._ _

__Just and she rounded the corner she was mere feet from the ER entrance. Her heart dropped to her stomach again as she pushed through the double doors, her mind frantic and short circuiting. Wendy observed all the doors and metal titles as she walked down another hallway._ _

__

__“Ma’am how can I help you?” A nurse spoke from behind a desk as she put a phone back on a receiver._ _

__“My name is Wendy and I was called by a nurse named Diana about a patient, Mary Goore.” Wendy looked around frantically._ _

__“ID, please.” The nurse held out her hand and Wendy quicky rummaged through her purse, ripping her wallet out to grab her license._ _

__“I promise, I know him, he’s my roommate…my best friend.” Her voice began to crack. “my everything…” Afraid the nurse wouldn’t believe her, Wendy unlocked her phone and pulled up recent photos of she and Mary at home sitting on the couch making silly faces._ _

__“I am the only family he has here.” Her eyes were tired, red and glassy from crying as she pleaded her case._ _

__The nurse took down the information on her license and quietly handed it back._ _

__“Mary is still being assessed.” The nurse began. “He was in a car accident this evening, but I can’t give any information other than that right now. I promise the doctor will be out to talk to you shortly…but first, will you fill out these papers, as much as you can about his medical history?”_ _

__The nurse politely shoved a clip board and pin her way and pointed to the waiting area to her left. Wendy felt defeated but antsy as she walked over to the seating area. However, she couldn’t sit. Sliding off her purse to one of the grey cloth chairs, she paced the floor and began filling out all the information. In two years Wendy had learned more about Mary than most people know about each other. However, he didn’t talk about his family much; but she gathered enough from passing comments to fill in a few blanks. The adrenaline kicking in, Wendy quickly finished up the paperwork and walked it back over to the desk._ _

__“Thank you, ma’am, the doctor will be with you as soon as he can.” The nurse smiled sympathetically as she accepted the clipboard._ _

__Wendy nodded emotionless before turning on her heels back to the waiting area. Trying to keep herself from a wandering mind, she finally thought enough to call Jan._ _

__“Jan…” She cleared her throat, though it was no secret Dee had been crying._ _

__“Dee…what’s going on? Mary make it home?”_ _

__Dee took a deep breath and furrowed her brows as another set of tears trickled down her cheeks._ _

__“He…um…there was an accident.” Dee sighed and bit her lip before continuing. “Mary was in a car accident.”_ _

__“Where are you?”_ _

__“Brutton View in the ER…they can’t tell me anything yet, just that he’s being assessed…and the doctor will be out to talk to me when he can.” She managed to get out before sobbing quietly into the arm of her long sleeve._ _

__“Just trying to take some deep breaths, Dee, it’s going to be OK.” Jan cooed softly. “I’m leaving soon and will be there in a few minutes, just hang in there.”_ _

__“Mmhmm.” She managed to mumble before hanging up, only for her phone to begin vibrating again._ _

__Wendy’s heart dropped as she looked down at the screen, flashing tow voicemails from Mary. But how? Was he already taken care of? Why didn’t her phone ring? She hesitated with shaky hands before unlocking her phone and holding it up to her ear._ _

__“ _Hey, it’s Mary…I mean, you already knew that, duh. Anyway, I got your messages, baby doll _.”___ _

____Wendy felt her chest tighten as the tears streamed down her cheeks like a gushing faucet. She couldn’t catch her breath at the thought of these calls being made right before his accident. Was this the reason for the accident? Was it Wendy’s fault? If she had never called, he would have never came…he would have never—she couldn’t think anymore as the second message began._ _ _ _

____“ _I’m on my way home right now. I’ll see you soon, and we can talk about everything…but only if you want to—I love you, Wendy _.”___ _ _ _

______That was it, it was too much. Hearing his voice, actually hearing him profess his feelings; Wendy couldn’t take it. She needed to know…was he even alive? How long had he been there? Would she get to see him ever again? Would she get to hold him and tell him all the wonderful ways he makes her feel? The more her mind raced, the tighter her chest became. Her heart pounded in her ears as she hung her head, her body shaking. She sobbed as quietly as she could. Wendy realized then, that no matter the outcome, she could never forgive herself for all that had happened in the last three days…if he made it out of this alive, she would be making it up to him the rest of his life, if he would consider her…_ _ _ _ _ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Brutton View is totally fictional, just something I randomly thought up.


	21. Inside Your Mind

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Warning, more hospital details and treatment.* 
> 
> -Obviously not textbook procedure for hospitals, treatment, etc. but it fit the story and direction. 
> 
> -Thank you to everyone continuing to read and comment on the story.

“Wendy?” A soft voice spoke before a light hand was placed on her shaking shoulder. She could feel the person sit down beside her. “Wendy…I know I said I wasn’t supposed to, and I’m not…but you shouldn’t be this upset if you don’t have to be.” 

Wendy looked up to see the nurse from the station sitting beside her, offering a cup of plain coffee. 

“Just between us, Mary is stable and will soon be moved to a room; understand that things can change for the better or worse at any given moment, but right now, he is stable.” She offered a soft smile as Wendy sniffled and wiped her face on her jacket. 

A flood of relief washed over her as she sobbed harder than before. The nurse sat the cup down and immediately wrapped her arms around Wendy’s shoulder. 

“Shhh…I know this kind of thing can be scary, but you are not alone.” She spoke soothingly. “We have some of the best nurse and doctors in the state working here, and they will give Mary nothing but the most quality care possible, I can promise you that.” 

“T-thank you.” Wendy mumbled as the nurse pulled away and offered the cup to her again. “Here, have some coffee and try to calm yourself; if you’d rather tea or water, or maybe soda, I can find something more.” 

“No, this is more than enough, thank you so much.” Wendy smiled sadly, her eyes and face blotchy and swollen from the hard tears shed. 

The nurse sat with her a few moments more before having to attend to new admissions at her desk. Wendy felt somewhat calmer as she sipped on the hot coffee, though it reminded her of Mary and his early morning coffee routine. He _always _made sure Wendy had a fresh pot before work, always. Even if he had a late shift at the Davis’ or a Sunday night show ran later than expected, there was always a fresh pot waiting for her. He had become quite sly, never making his presence known as he crept into the kitchen at some ungodly hour. He refused to use the digital programmer, citing its unreliable nature no matter how many times she insisted, and this became his little routine. One of his may kind gestures that translated as a love language she only now recognized.__

__Lost in her thoughts, Wendy was startled as a man in scrubs approached her. He was older, short salt and pepper hair, silver framed glasses, tall, a kind face._ _

__“Ms. Duval?” He spoke as he held his hand out. “I’m Doctor Green, I’ve been taking care of Mary.”_ _

__“Dr. Green,” Wendy shot up out of her seat and shook his hand. “How is he?”_ _

__The doctor paused as he looked down at the chart in his free hand, each second causing Wendy’s heart to drop further and further in her stomach._ _

__“He’s stable.” Dr. Green nodded. “It was a bad accident, he’s lucky to be alive with lesser injuries than we initially expected.”_ _

__Wendy’s lip quivered at the thought, _he’s lucky to be alive _…it hit her in a way, even deeper through the heart.___ _

____“He has a broken arm, a mild concussion, some bad bruising on his body. I can’t be sure about his ribs yet, but we will do some x-rays again tomorrow to check for fractures or breaks.”_ _ _ _

____“Is he breathing on his own?” She managed._ _ _ _

____“He is.” The doctor nodded again. “But he was a little agitated and panicked, so we had to sedate him; his body needs some time to rest from such trauma, so we will monitor him closely in ICU over the next couple of days and wean him off the sedation.”_ _ _ _

____“ICU?” Wendy furrowed her brows in her own panic. “Just a precautionary measure, I assure you, Ms. Duval; with full body injury and sedation, it’s best to have him with hands on staff that can monitor.”_ _ _ _

____“We aren’t totally out of the woods, but things look good, very good.”_ _ _ _

____“Can I see him now, please?”_ _ _ _

____“He’s pretty banged up, Ms. Duval, I’m not sure now is the best time…” The doctor hesitated._ _ _ _

____“Please, you don’t understand.” Wendy’s voice began to crack. “I just need to see for myself, I need to know he’s OK.”_ _ _ _

____Dr. Green sighed a heavy sigh and nodded towards the elevator._ _ _ _

____“Thank you.” Wendy wiped her eyes as she followed him in and up to the seventh floor._ _ _ _

____It was a quiet floor, each room visible, by the front walls being made of glass, a nice feature for the nurses and doctors to monitor the patients. Down at the end of the first hall, room 777, nurse were just about the walk out as Dr. Green led Wendy to the glass door._ _ _ _

____Her heart sank upon entering, seeing this traumatic sight before her. There, Mary laid in a white hospital gown, his body up to his chest covered in a couple of thin blankets, while his left arm was splinted and slightly elevated on a pillow. Though he was breathing on his own, he was being helped along by tubes running from his nose to a tank on the floor, forcing a better flow of oxygen to his body. His face, God his poor face. Mary had earned a nasty little gash above his right eye, one that required stitches, while a sustained some swelling and bruising on one of his cheeks and his chin. No matter what, Wendy could still see him, she could still see her Mary behind all the pain._ _ _ _

____Dee’s eyes watered as she took in the sight of the various tubes running from his body and arms. Then she noticed something clutched in one of his hands. Forcing herself closer, she could see that it was a photograph._ _ _ _

____“Before being sedated again, he insisted that be taken that out of his wallet and given to him.” The small framed nurse spoke from behind Wendy, startling her. “A nurse from the ER said he wanted them to know that the beautiful girl in the picture was named Wendy.”_ _ _ _

____Wendy bit her lip as she braved up and brushed her fingers across his knuckles, gaining a small twitch._ _ _ _

____“You can come back tomorrow, but it is well past visiting hours—” Dr. Green began to speak._ _ _ _

____“I’m not leaving him; I don’t care if I have to sleep in the parking lot, I’m not leaving.” Wendy looked back sternly. “We’ve been apart for three days and he was on his way… _I’m not leaving him _.”___ _ _ _

______Dr. Green knew there was no fighting her strong spirit. Wendy was determined to let no one stand in her way, not even a doctor. She knew what was best for Mary, or both of them, and that was to be near each other. The only way they would get her out would be to throw her out, and Dr. Green didn’t feel like dealing with security that night…_ _ _ _ _ _

______“You can stay.” He sighed and shook his head, a small smile tugging at his lips. “Just don’t disturb him and let the nurse do their job.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Thank you.” Wendy sniffled again as she sat down on the chair beside his bed. “I promise I won’t be any bother.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Dr. Green smiled and nodded one last time before mumbling a few orders to the small nurse and quietly disappearing after._ _ _ _ _ _

______Wendy stared at Mary’s poor face, just happy to see him again. Happy to watch his chest rise and fall accompanied by small breathes. Any sign of life no matter how soft, she was happy to witness, especially the warmth of his hand._ _ _ _ _ _

______“He can hear you; you know?” The nurse spoke quietly as she observed the numbers on a monitor. “whatever you want to say, he’ll be able to hear you. It’s good for them, someone talking. For some patients it’s very comforting, something that drives them closer to recovery.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Wendy smiled nervously at the nurse for a moment before looking back at Mary._ _ _ _ _ _

______“My name is Gail by the way, I’ll be Mary’s nurse most of the time.” She continued. “If you need anything, food, fresh sheets, anything at all, just tell me and I’ll get them for you.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Thank you, Gail, I appreciate that.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Wendy wasn’t much for talking at this point and Gail understood, but she did bring in a tray of food a few moments later, _just in case _. Wendy was glad someone like Gail was assigned to Mary. It gave her comfort knowing just as the previous nurse had promised, he was getting the best care.___ _ _ _ _ _

________Wendy’s phone began to vibrate, a text from Jan._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________'Emergency with Jack’s grandmother. Can’t make it there yet. I’m so sorry…any update?' _\- J__ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

___________'Hope everything is OK…he’s banged up pretty bad, but sedated and stable. I’m here with him now' _. - W__ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_____________'Damn. I’m glad they let you stay with him though. He’s gonna need you, Dee. You two hang in there and keep me updated when you can. I’ll be there as soon as we figure out what’s going on with Jack’s grandmother. Love you, girl _'. - J__ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_______________'Wasn’t going to leave without a fight. LOL. Doing the best I can, will keep you updated. Best of luck with his grandma. Love you too, J' _. -W__ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________Wendy was kind of glad Jan hadn’t made it, though she wished it was for better reason. Right now Dee needed to be alone with Mary, have some time to process everything that had occurred._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________She sat there by his bed, continuing to watch his body fight as she cried in silence. She felt so many things all at once; relief, fear exhaustion, guilt…the guilt really plagued her. She couldn’t shake the idea that had she not called, he wouldn’t be in this hospital bed banged up and sedated. He wouldn’t have had this close brush with death at barely thirty years old. None of this would’ve happened if she wouldn’t have been so stubborn in the first place…_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________Helpless and emotional, Wendy finally began to speak._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________“Mary, it’s me, Wendy…I’m here with you right now. You had a little accident and are currently in the hospital. Room 777 to be exact. I thought you might find that funny.” She huffed and tried to muster a smile as she placed her hand over his. “Your nurse, her name is Gail, she said you could hear everything I say to you; I really hope that’s true. I have so much I want to say…”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________His hand slightly twitched as she took a pause. It could have simply been a random reaction, but Wendy took it as a small sign and felt encouraged to continue._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________“But at the same time, I don’t know what to say, so I’m just going to speak without reserve.” She took a deep breath. “Mary, I love you; I love you so much that it hurts every fiber of my being to see you in this mess and I can’t do anything more than speak to you.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________“I’m so sorry that I refused to talk to you three days ago. I shut you down because I was scared. I was scared that if I finally admitted what I felt, you would go away, or that it would change our dynamic, hold you back from being you or pursuing your dreams—and I thought I wasn’t good enough for you.” Dee sighed._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________“I still don’t think I’m good enough, and who’s to say you even want something super serious anyway…right now that doesn’t matter, right now what matters is that I love you more than anything in this world, even more than music. I love every stupid little detail about our life living together. I love how you insist on making coffee for me every single morning, no matter how late you were out the night before. I love how we cuddle and watch movies together. I love how you put up with my stupid holiday traditions…and even though you hate them, I love how you agree to go to Ghost shows with me…I just, I love you and I can’t help it no matter how hard I could try. You are it for me, Mary, and you always will be.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________Looking past the bruising and swelling, she saw that handsome face and mustered a sad smile before breaking into a silent sob and lowering her face down to his knuckles. She placed a small gentle kiss on top of his hand and rested her cheek against it, allowing a wave of relief wash over her having said at least a pinch of what she wished for him to know. Even if he couldn’t hear her, saying it out loud made it a reality that she only hoped she’d have to repeat when they decided to wake him._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________Wendy never bothered to recline her chair, opting to fall asleep bent forward with her face still pressed against his knuckles while his hand continued to hold the photo._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________Time slipped away from Wendy, night soon turning to early morning as Gail came in to do her last round before heading home._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________“Wh-what did I miss?” Wendy shot up groggily to look around the room._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________“Relax, Ms. Duval, just doing my last check for the morning.” Gail smiled softly. “How’d you sleep?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________“OK.” Wendy stretched her back and neck, much less sore than she expected. “Is…is he—”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________“He’s just fine.” The nurse scribbled down a few things on his chart. “The question is…how are you doing, Wendy?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________It seemed like it had been ages since someone asked her this question. In reality Jan had just asked her the day before, but Mary’s accident seemed to fast forward time and pause it all at once. It felt so strange that someone asked about her feelings when he was lying there, barely seeming alive, all but the breaths flowing from his lips and the twitch of his hand._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________“I’m here.” Wendy smiled nervously._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________Gail smiled back and looked at Mary for a moment._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________“He is one of the most strong willed patients we’ve had in a while.” She rested the chart against her chest. “Love drives the human body to incredible lengths, and love drove him in a way I’ve only witnessed a few times. His will to make sure you were found was so strong. He just didn’t want to be without you.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________“He…he’s my best friend.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________“And you must be some friend too, to make such an impact on him.” Gail looked warmly in her direction. “…I’ll make sure someone brings breakfast for you soon, and I’ll be back late tonight for a new shift.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________“Oh, you don’t have to do that, I’ll be fine.” Wendy shook her head._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________“Nonsense; Mary needs you to take care of yourself too if you’re going stay and keep him company.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________Gail wasn’t wrong, and Wendy stopped protesting. Half an hour later, a hospital staffer brought a tray in for Wendy, a kind smile gracing their face. Though they didn’t speak as much as Gail, they were kind and Wendy was thankful._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________After breakfast she slipped off to the bathroom and called work to explain. She was surprised at their genuine understanding and felt grateful to be given the option to start working remote for a length of time to help Mary get back on his feet…if he even wanted to come home after this._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________With a few more work calls out of the way, Wendy settled back into her chair by Mary, dozing off for a few minutes until another nurse came in. Another sweet nurse named Anna. She wasn’t chatty, but she always offered updates on Mary each hour._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________Before Wendy knew it, nighttime had fallen again, and by midnight Gail was back, bearing gifts._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________“Here, I thought you might need these.” She smiled and handed a red and white shopping bag towards Wendy. “A few years ago my husband and I lived a few states away from any family, and he was in a car accident. I refused to leave the hospital to grab things from our apartment, and this really sweet night nurse went out and grabbed some new things for me before one of her shifts…I want to pay that forward; I know how scary and exhausting it can be.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________Wendy began to tear up as she looked down at the contents of the bag, fashionable black sweats, t-shirts, slippers, toiletries. She needed a little bit of granted grace, and this was it. The kindest gesture, though she didn’t feel she deserved, she was thankful for._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________“Thank you.” Wendy bit her lip as the tears trickled down her cheeks. “Your kindness means the world to me.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________“Well let me extend it a little further; I’ll sit with Mary and you can go shower.” Gail grinned softly. “I promise he’ll be safe with me.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________Though Wendy felt hesitant at first, she knew realistically, Gail was more equipped to take care of Mary in the first place. Exhausted, gross, and in dire need of a shower, Wendy finally gave in and shuffled to the bathroom. With all the late night bar shows, Wendy thought she knew a good shower, but this, this was a damn good shower. It wasn’t even a special space, but the feeling of washing away this exhaustion and fear; the feeling that she knew when she walked out that door Mary would be waiting on the other side, asleep, but still…it took a weight off her shoulders._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________Dressed in sweats, a t-shirt and slippers, Wendy pulled her damp hair up in a bun and did a minimal version of her nightly routine before reentering the room. There, Gail sat by the bed, looking over a chart while Mary continued to sleep._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________“Feel better?” Gail stood up with a big smile on her face._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________“Much better, thank you…for everything, you’re an angel.” Wendy gushed. “Hardly, but I appreciate that.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________Gail have her nightly spill like before and soon disappeared after checking Mary’s vitals one last time._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________“Alright, Goore, let’s watch a movie, eh?” Wendy mustered a smiled before sitting on her chair with a cover pulled just under her shoulders before she grabbed his hand with one, and the remote with the other. Surfing through the many channels, she smiled when she landed on one of his favorites._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________“Ah, well, it seems it’s your lucky night. Looks like we’ll be watching _Salem’s Lot _.” Wendy was surprised to feel a slight jerk of his hand at this revelation. Again, it could’ve been a fluke, but deep down, she wanted to believe it was Mary.___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________They hadn’t watched this in quite a few months, and though Wendy would have liked to be watching at home, snuggled up in bed with Mary…this did as second best. She almost finished the whole movie before her eyes became heavy with sleep._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________“I’m not sure how much longer I can stay awake, Mare.” Wendy yawned. “Just in case…I love you and I hope you’re resting well.” Again, his hand jerked ever so slightly one last time before Wendy was ultimately claimed by sleep._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _


	22. Welcome Back, Goore

The next night Doctor Green decided it was time to begin weaning Mary off the sedation. He warned that Mary could wake up at any point, panicked or violent. Wendy didn’t care if he was a flat out bastard when he woke, so long as he flashed those beautiful green eyes again. She braced herself to pull an all-nighter with Gail, and she really thought she had it in the bag, but around three her eyes became heavy again, forcing her to rest her head against his hand again like the first night… 

_The darkness began to fade, and the sounds of a faraway television began to near itself to Mary. There was this timed beeping right in his ear, annoying as fuck as he walked through what became a dark hallway, a door just as the ending, seeming to contain an illumination of sorts behind it._

_“Gotta remember before ya go, Goore.” An unfamiliar voice mumbled in his head causing him to whip his body around, searching in the blackness._

_“Remember what?”_

_“The accident, Mare, you gotta remember before ya can go…they you can be with her like you wanted.”_

_Before Mary could get another word out, flashes of the accident came pulsing through his mind, almost bringing him to his knees. Just as the car came barreling towards him, his eyes began to flutter open. ___

__The pain was overwhelming, his whole body ached and throbbed, though he felt so sluggish and muffled. His head felt foggy and tired, but the words on his lips mattered more to him in that moment than anything else in the world. He needed to find Wendy and say the three words loud to make it real…he needed to say what he set out to before the accident. What if she didn’t know where he was? What if she couldn’t find him? What if she decided it was all too much and she made a mistake calling? Just as his heart began to race yet again, he noticed a weighted feeling on his hand. Tears pool in his eyes as he looked over to see Wendy sitting on a chair, her head pressed forward against the bed, asleep while she held his hand with her fingers on his pulse point._ _

__“Dee…” his voice was sluggish and hoarse as he squeezed her hand the best he could through his weakened state. “Dee…”_ _

__Wendy quickly shot up from her position at the sound of his voice. She looked so tired as their eyes met for the first time in almost six days._ _

__“Mare.” She sobbed as she kissed his hand. “Oh my god… _I’m so sorry _.”___ _

____“I…I love you.” He managed as their eyes met again. Wendy’s heart burst with an overflow of love that she had never felt before. “I love you too.”_ _ _ _

____Neither one could believe they were looking into each other’s eyes as she stood up, still holding his hand just firm enough._ _ _ _

____The tears slipped from his cheeks as he looked her face over, remembering all she had said to him._ _ _ _

____“Me too.” He managed._ _ _ _

____“Huh?” Wendy furrowed her brows when he squeezed her hand again._ _ _ _

____“Coffee…movies…Gh-ghost.” He voice still sluggish and breathy._ _ _ _

____Wendy’s knees suddenly felt weak as she realized just what he was referring to. It was barely six in the morning and they were both emotional blubbering messes. Though she never wanted to leave his side, she forced herself to stand._ _ _ _

____“I have to go tell the nurses that you’re awake, but I promise. I will be right back.”_ _ _ _

____Mary’s eyes widened with fear as he grasped her hand the best he could. How could she leave him like this? Those vulnerable green eyes scanned her face, wishing to ingrain her features to memory again, just in case he went back to the darkness._ _ _ _

____“I promise.” Wendy lifted his hand in hers before kissing it. “I will right back as soon as I tell them; do you need anything now though?”_ _ _ _

____Mary felt an instant calm as her lips touched his skin. Affection of any sort from Wendy helped to put him at ease._ _ _ _

____“Water.” Was all he said, and she nodded before disappearing. Soon Gail and another nurse walked in to look him over before the doctor arrived. A nice LPN working on the floor hooked Wendy up with a tumbler of ice water and a plastic bendy straw before she walked back inside._ _ _ _

____“Ma’am, if you aren’t family, you can’t be in here.” The unfamiliar nurse looked back. She had just started her shift and obviously had no clue who she was._ _ _ _

____“I want her here.” Mary weakly protested as he attempted to pull his arm away. “Fine, but don’t get in the way.” The nurse rolled her eyes realizing quickly what a handful Mary could be._ _ _ _

____“Can he…can he have some water?” Wendy asked nervously as she took a step closer. “He can have a little, but not too much; doc will want to take him for a few tests soon.” Gail smiled before scribbling something down on Mary’s chart. “Mary, you might feel tired soon, but that is completely normal after sedation. Don’t fight sleep of it comes, OK; your body needs rest right now.”_ _ _ _

____“Sure.” Mary turned his head to look towards Wendy._ _ _ _

____“Just steer clear of Ida, she’s a little old school.” Gail patted Wendy’s shoulder as Ida walked out. “As far as I can tell, Mary is out of the woods, but the tests will tell us more.”_ _ _ _

____Gail was practically oozing excitement, seeing one of her patients recovering so well. Mary was an easier case than most, but still, it gave her a sense of accomplishment._ _ _ _

____“Thank you.” Wendy nodded as Gail squeezed her shoulder before disappearing._ _ _ _

____With that, they were finally alone again. Though she was nervous and scared, Wendy stood by his bed with the tumbler. “Ready for some water?” She asked._ _ _ _

____“Please.” Mary tried his best to nod though his neck as still sore and stiff. As if water could really have a taste, it never tasted or felt so good hitting his tongue and throat for the first time in three days. He wanted to drink the entire thing, though Wendy stopped him halfway, but not without some Goore charm._ _ _ _

____“Dee…” He whined with puppy dog eyes, his voice becoming more clear and easy to control. “Just a little more…please.”_ _ _ _

____“Two more sips, and that’s it; you have to wait to see what the doctor wants to do.” Wendy huffed, gladly defeated by this adorable creature before her. With that, Mary took two long sips. She couldn’t help but to smile at his deviancy still ever present, almost sucking the bottom out of the tumbler with those long sips._ _ _ _

____“Better?”_ _ _ _

____“Mm…much better.” Mary grinned the best he could, completely content before laying back on his pillows. Wishing just to touch even her hand, he turned his over flat and curled his fingers in a ‘come hither’ motion until her hand met his._ _ _ _

____“I’m glad you’re here.” He squeezed her hand gently. “I’m glad that _you _are here, Mare.” Wendy huffed, trying not to, but failing miserably letting tears trickle down her cheeks. “I almost lost you.”___ _ _ _

______“You didn’t, and that’s all that matters.” He assured her. “But it’s my fault that you’re here; if I hadn’t called—”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“If you hadn’t called, we would never know how we both feel; you didn’t cause the accident.” Mary looked her right in the eyes. “It wasn’t your fault, Dee; don’t blame yourself for something you could never control.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“But you were on your way home.” She sniffled. “I was, and I would do it a million times over too if that meant I would end up right here with you.” Mary spoke so honestly. “I’m the one in the hospital bed, let me be the one who’s right, OK?”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Wendy nodded, just grateful that he was upright and speaking._ _ _ _ _ _

______“How long have you been here anyway?” Mary asked. “Since you arrived…we’re on day three.” Wendy bit the inside of her lip and laughed nervously. “I probably look pretty rough, huh?”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“You look tired.” He grinned. “And maybe a little rough.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______They both laughed at his brutal honesty something that didn’t seem to change even with the professed love between them._ _ _ _ _ _

______“I’m gonna take a nap, why don’t you go home and rest for a while.” Mary suggested. “No way, I’m not leaving you.” Wendy bared down. “Not when you’ve just woken up.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Fine, fine, when they take me back for these stupid tests, I demand you go home even just for an hour. Take some time for yourself, shower, rest. I fuckin’ mean it, Dee. You can’t take care of me if you’re tired too.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“And just who said I was going to take care of you, Goore?” She winked. “Mm, you will take care of me and love every minute of it.” He grinned earnestly before closing his eyes. “It’s true, I will.” Wendy smiled content with the truth._ _ _ _ _ _

______Mary rested for the next thirty minutes, a permanent smile on his full lips. Even through all of the bruises and slight swelling he looked so handsome to Wendy. She never wanted to look away, watching his shallow breaths and the numbers on the monitors change ever so slightly with each inhale and exhale._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Knock, knock,” The doctor knocked on the wall before walking in with a nice expression on his face. “What did I miss?” Mary’s eyes fluttered open while he yawned. “Nothing Mr. Goore, you’re right on time.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“So what are ya gonna do to me, doc? Death imminent?”_ _ _ _ _ _

______The doctor couldn’t help but to chuckle as he looked over Mary’s chart._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Well, Mary, it seems that you might have used one of your nine lives, but fortunate for you, death is far from your scope. Just don’t go jumping out of airplanes or running marathons when you get home.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Neither thing seems appealing.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Good, then you’ll live a long happy life; though I would advise cutting back on smoking and drinking, just to lead a healthier lifestyle.” The doctor added. “Ah, doc, let’s not be unreasonable. Before I know it, you’re gonna to tell me not indulge in carnal desires either.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Well, I would refrain for at least a week, two weeks if you can wait; just to give your body adequate rest.” He shrugged as Mary twisted his lips in disgust. “However, that is really all dependent upon your own limitations and the tests results from today.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Mary and Wendy only had sex once and that ended in a full disaster afterwards. Besides, it was naïve of Wendy to think he might be inquiring for the two of them. He had never been the most monogamous in the world and could’ve been talking about anyone. It honestly was a little silly to think that once they said, ‘ _I love you _’, life would be like a cookie cutter romance novel.___ _ _ _ _ _

________“Speaking of the tests, we should get you down to x-ray and the lab for some blood work.” The doctor continued with his content expression as the nurses walked in with a wheelchair._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“And that is your cue to go home for a little while.” Mary looked over to Wendy with a small smirk. “I’m a little banged up, but I’m not dying; go relax. Get the house ready for my big arrival.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Wendy stood up reluctant, but quickly put a smile on her face. “I promise I’ll be back soon. And I’ll bring something comfortable for you to wear.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Thanks…now go.” He attempted to nod towards the door._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Wendy squeezed his hand once more before disappearing down the hall. She could barely force herself to walk into the elevator and press the ‘down’ button, but she did it. Her mind began to race the moment the doors closed. Dee thought of all the things she wanted to buy to make him comfortable. A trip to a department store was in on the list before she ventured home. Probably not the smartest idea considering she was exhausted and gross, but she didn’t care. This little trip meant that Mary would come home…_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Meanwhile, Mary let the nurses pull back the covers on his bed…_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Just, wait till she’s gone before I get up. This fuckin’ hurts and I don’t wanna worry her.” Mary spoke quietly and the nurses understood with Gail poking her head out the door the keep watch._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Alright, Mr. Goore, she’s gone.” She nodded and walked back over with the wheelchair. “Do I really have to use that thing?” He twisted his lips unconvinced. “Afraid so, Mr. Goore. We can’t have you falling.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Though Mary knew it was necessary, it didn’t make him like it any less. He let them remove the recently unnecessary tubes and wires from his body an unpleasant experience at best. Then they moved onto getting him completely upright and sitting. As if he thought the previous experience sucked, this was even worse._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Just take some slow deep breaths as you sit up, Mr. Goore. It’s going to hurt, especially probably your torso.” Ida spoke calmly as she placed a hand behind his shoulder, helping him lift his torso. Mary hissed and winced at the aching pain throbbing over his chest. “Just focus on breathing and we will do the rest.” Ida repeated again, gaining his attention as they stalled to give him a moment of adjustment._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________The doctor observed Mary as he slid his legs off the bed himself, so he was in a seated position. _Slow deep breaths, in and out, in and out _.___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________“Very good, Mr. Goore. That is the kind of determination that will get you out of this hospital.” The doctor encouraged as the nurses helped him stand, only to quickly turn him around and gently settle him into the wheelchair._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________“We will get you back on some pain meds after the tests so you’re comfortable.” The doctor assured him before walking alongside as they wheeled him to the elevator with his IV drip following behind._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________He was already so tired and unfathomably sore, especially his ribs. Mary tried to shift in his seat to get comfortable, but nothing really seemed to help. The irritation building as they wheeled him out on the second floor was apparent with his incessant grumbling. Three days of sedation made him sensitive and the lights seemed entirely too bright for his liking as he shielded them the best he could._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________First stop, X-Rays and second stop, blood work. Mary had tattoos, he’d had piercings, but everything felt all the more painful being twisted and turned, poked and prodded._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________“If I get poked one more time I’m gonna fuckin’ lose it.” Mary grumbled and jerked his arm away after a phlebotomist bandaged the vein at the bend of his arm. “Well you’re in luck, Mr. Goore. No more needles.” She smirked. “You are all finished up and ready to get you back to your room.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________He had never been so relieved to hear those words. Ida and Gail, the nice nurse, wheeled him back to the elevator and finally, to a new floor._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________“Wha-where are we?” Mary furrowed his brows at this new room. At least it had a nice view._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________“Doc wants to move you out of the ICU to a regular room, Mary; this is a really good thing. One step closer to going home.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________Mary hated change; especially change he didn’t expect. However, he made the best of it. All he cared was that Wendy knew where he was. ICU, regular room, it didn’t matter as long as she came back to see him._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________While Mary got settled into his new room with much needed pain meds, Wendy wandered off in the department store…_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________Pushing the red plastic cart she started on her mission. The store was in full swing of Halloween with every single aisle having something with pumpkins or skeletons on it. Wendy grinned as she happened upon a black fleece blanket covered in various types of skulls; the perfect blanket for Mary to snuggle while recovering. One thing down, a million more to go. Things seemed to come easier with the perfect new spooky mug, a few pairs of soft pajama pants, matching house slippers and a zip hoodie in case he was cold but also too sensitive to wear a shirt. She tried to think of anything and everything. Even going as far as to buy him some bubbles for a bath if he would agree to even soak his tired body. If it was possible she thought of it._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________Caring for others was in her wheelhouse, but this chance to care meant more than all anything. She felt she needed to prove to Mary that she cared after being so shitty. He was there because of her. Had she just gone to him, maybe it could’ve been her in his place. She would have gladly taken it too, if that meant he wouldn’t feel pain. There was no time to feel sorry for herself as she grabbed a few bags of peanut butter kisses and headed to checkout, which felt excruciatingly slow._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________Once home she washed her sheets with the hopes that Mary would stay in her room. Then she crept to his room and grabbed a couple pairs of lounge pants, t-shirts and his favorite pillow covered in dancing skeletons. A gift from Dee that he had kept and slept with since he received it. She smiled down at the worn pillow, tears slowly creeping up in her eyes before pulling the fabric to her nose to inhale the familiar scent of him. Hesitant to pull herself from this wonderful smell, she grabbed an empty backpack from the corner of his room and stuffed the shirt and pants inside before grabbing some boxers and socks, carefully packing them along with everything else._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________“Body wash.” She walked into his bathroom and grabbed the grey bottle from the shower wall. Everything was exactly as Mary had left it a week before. His presence still greatly felt, but this emptiness plagued Wendy with the thought of what could have been. She could’ve been getting ready for a funeral, not a hospital visit; and the thought was entirely too much to bear as she burst into tears. Sliding down against the wall, she fought to pull herself together._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________Wendy made a promise to herself right then and there that no matter what, she would fight for him, for them, for a chance to see if this could work. She would fight for their friendship, for love._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________After a good cry, Dee forced herself into the shower to wash away three days of stress and depression. At least she looked better than she felt as she dressed in something more comfortable. Sitting back on the fresh bedding, she smiled back at the new pillow and blanket folded nice and neat on Mary’s side of the bed, closest to the bathroom for ease. The bedside table was now cleared of all her things ready to host whatever Mary needed._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _


	23. au naturel

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mary and Wendy share an awkward hospital shower

The drive was uneventful and quiet, thankfully. But panic ensued when Wendy reached the ICU unit and Mary’s room was cleared. 

“Excuse me, nurse, where is this patient?” Wendy looked frantic at the nurse behind the desk. “I’m sorry, ma’am but I cannot give you that information.” 

“I have been here for three days visiting him!” Wendy became irritable. “Today was the first time I have left his side! I have clothes for him! I need to see him!” The volume of her voice increased with each proclamation as she slipped the black backpack off her shoulders and held it up to eye level. 

“Ms. Duval, please, please, he is fine. Just in a different room on a regular floor.” Gail came to her side to defuse the situation. “I’ll take you down to his room right away.” 

Wendy made sure to scour at the nurse behind the desk before following Gail back to the elevator and down two floors to his room. “What is the deal with some of these nurses?” She huffed. “Ah, Ida and Jessa are both entirely too literal sometimes.

“You should be on this floor, Gail.” Wendy smiled in her direction as they walked down the long white and tan hallway. “You have been so kind to me and great with Mary.” 

“Though this is a nice floor, I’m right where I’m needed for those who need a little extra care.” She smiled back, a soft expression in her eyes. 

_Room 665 ___

__“Oh, I’m sure he was disappointed to be one number off.” Wendy giggled. “Yes, he made mention of this upon entering. He’s getting his spunk back compared to this morning, so be prepared.”_ _

__“Were the test results good?”_ _

__“Everything checked out just fine.” Gail nodded. “Doc wants to keep him at least another night, but Mary isn’t happy with this idea; might need some words of encouragement.”_ _

__“I’ll see what I can do.” Wendy agreed before slipping the backpack off her shoulders again. “Has he been offered a shower yet; I brought clothes and toiletries.”_ _

__Gail pulled his chart from the door an examined the various notes bringing herself up to date. “He was offered a shower but refused to be bathed, so maybe that’s something else to talk about now that you’re here to help. I’m sure he would much rather have you than some stranger. Most patients, especially the men, prefer their significant others when possible.”_ _

__For fucks sake, they hadn’t even had the chance to talk and now this? But, of course, she would help him. She would do anything for Mary; however, she wasn’t so sure how well Mary would accept her help. He wasn’t entire helpless, but he needed someone near to keep him from slipping through his weakened state._ _

__“I’ll talk to him.” Wendy agreed and exchanged quick pleasantries with Gail, seeing her off before walking into the room._ _

__Mary was sitting up on the bed, pillows stacked comfortably while he surfed the channels. He seemed irritable, but thankful to be sitting up._ _

__“Knock, knock,” Wendy knocked on the wall as the door closed behind her. Mary perked up instantly, a glowing smile on his bruised cheeks. “Finally.” He breathed. “They’re so fuckin’ annoying, Dee; you know they wanted to bathe me?! What am I, a kid?!”_ _

__Seeing him so bent out of shape, it took everything in Wendy to hold back the giggle in her throat. He was genuinely baffled and upset by this intrusive idea._ _

__“Well, what if… _I _…helped you?” Wendy almost twisted her lips as she sat his backpack down at the edge of the bed to stand in full view in front of Mary. “Yeah, because that is exactly how I envisioned you seeing me _au naturel _again.” He air quoted his little phrase entirely unimpressed by her offer._____ _

______“Would you rather me see you or some random nurse; besides I will keep my eyes up here.” Wendy gently bopped his nose with her finger, bringing a very small hint of a smile to the corners of his mouth. “I have no doubt that you are entirely capable, but factoring in your broken arm and bruised ribs, wouldn’t it be nice to have a little help with your hair and back? If I do so recall, you did something similar for me, recently…”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Mary huffed as he sat further back on the pillows weighing his options. He would either wallow in filth or give in to Wendy’s gentle offer…as embarrassing as it was to think about. She was right; he needed a little help._ _ _ _ _ _

______“I even brought the home speaker with me so you can listen to something you like to take your mind off the task at hand.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“ _Morbid Angel _?” He cross his arm gently over his belly. “Anything you want, Mare.” Wendy nodded with a small smile before disappearing to the spacious bathroom to lay out his clothes and toiletries.___ _ _ _ _ _

________Mary was sitting on the edge of the bed waiting for her when she walked back to the room._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Mr. Goore it’s time for your cast.” The older woman spoke with a gentle tone as a smile graced her cheeks seeing Wendy walk back from the bathroom, hopeful that she could alleviate some of the tension._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Can the cast wait a few minutes; Mary was just about to shower.” Wendy asked kindly. “Oh, yes, of course; let me unhook the IV and I’ll push back his timeslot.” The nurse happily obliged, believing he had waited for Wendy all this time. “Just, make sure his arm moves as little as possible and keep it in a bended position until you put the sling back on.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Wendy listened to all of her instructions as she pointed out the red button in the bathroom that would instantly alert the nurse station if they required help. Bless the poor woman, she was being entirely thorough, but Mary’s patience was running thin. A few more words and he would have unleased the Goore wrath. However, Wendy shot him a small look that simmered him down until she left the room._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Alright, c’mon, Goore.” Dee helped him up slowly, his right arm naturally hooking around her shoulder as he limped into the bathroom, wincing every few steps until he was able to lean against the bathroom sink._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Though he was at what he might consider to be his lowest, Mary couldn’t help but to check Wendy out as she leaned into the shower to adjust the water. Her leggings looked exceptionally tight around her ass almost extracting a hum of approval from his throat._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Not too hot, not too cold.” Wendy turned around as he switched his gaze to her face. “Music?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Please...” His face lit up at the mention of music at all, and soon familiar sound hummed quietly through the bathroom._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“As much as you probably want to thrash your body around while hyped up on funny juice, remember the more you fuck around, the longer it takes to heal.” Dee warned before taking a spot behind him to untie the generic hospital gown. She tried her best not to acknowledge his ass as she reached the last tie, but it was more than difficult._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Alright,” She cleared her throat. “First things first, let’s wash your hair.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“How are you not going to get wet?” Mary smirked and let the gown fall to a pile on the floor now accepted he was entirely naked before this beautiful woman._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Wendy twisted her hair up in a clip then began removing her sneakers. “Oh, there is no avoiding…”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Mary swallowed hard and turned towards the shower while she undressed herself, folding her shirt, leggings, bra and underwear in a neat stack before walking past Mary to pull the shower curtain back._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Give me your hand and I’ll help you in.” Mary continued to look at the wall as he held out his hand helplessly hoping she could just lead him without contact. Wendy was graceful, stepping in and taking him with her. One hand holding his, the other on his back as she stood behind him, gave Mary a sense of comfort._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Is it too warm?” Wendy asked as the water began to trail down his pale battered body. “Mmm…it’s just right.” He hummed, moving close to the source to bask in the cleanliness. Wendy admired the release of tension in his shoulders as he let out a careful deep breath of contentment._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________She popped the cap on the shampoo and spoke softly before running her fingers through his coal black hair. “Is this OK?” Her nails scratched his scalp gently working in the sandalwood and musk scented shampoo._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Perfect, just perfect.” Mary huffed; his eyes closed truly enjoying the sensation._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________He wasn’t put off anymore by the idea of Wendy taking care of him like this. In fact, this was the most intimate thing he had experienced that didn’t have some sexual notion attached to it. He craved this feeling like he craved air in his sore lungs. Just Wendy touching him laced with a selfless care made his heart flutter and fall even deeper in love._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Time to rinse.” She spoke again, pulling him from his thoughts._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________From there the rest of the shower was uneventful and quiet all but the music echoing through the space. While Mary focused on the music and washing his body, Wendy stood within arm’s reach of his back in case he felt too weak to stand. However, Mary showered like a champ and didn’t falter once, though the pain meds were beginning to wear just a little and his movements weren’t as fluid by the time he rinsed for the last time._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Alright, sit on that chair and I’ll get dressed, then we’ll finish up.” Wendy directed Mary to the shower chair behind her. Mary continued to look at the wall until she disappeared, only then would he hobble over and sit._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Though Mary was able to dry the most intimate areas of his body, Wendy took over for his head, back and legs. “Just tell me if I’m hurting you, Mare; don’t push yourself, alright?” She spoke as she looked at the floor while patting his leg dry before grabbing his boxers. Sparing him as much dignity, she continued to look at the floor while he balanced his hand against her shoulder as he stepped each foot inside the fabric, working with her to pull the fabric up around the bottom of his belly. “Lounge pants and a t-shirt, then you’re free.” She smiled softly and unfolded the baggy black pants again repeating the same steps before standing._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Did you bring my razor?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Razor and shaving cream.” Wendy smiled again before rummaging through the backpack, producing requested items. Mary smiled in thanks before turning to the mirror for the first time since the accident. His breath hitched in his throat for a moment as he examined the stitches in his left brow accompanied by a gnarly purple and red bruise on his cheek and chin. Wendy bit the inside of her lip unsure if he would brush it off or breakdown for the first time since waking._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Well, at least I sorta look stage ready.” Mary smirked and shook his head before turning the sink on. That was all he said the rest of their bathroom session._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Mostly fresh faced, hair slicked back, and dressed in comfortable clothes, Mary felt like a new man; definitely still sore, but at least clean._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Uh, thank you, Dee…I—”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Don’t sweat it. You’ve done this for me before.” She smiled and leaned against the sink as he wiped his face._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“And I would again in a heartbeat, I swear.” Mary turned his gaze to her face, a sincerity laced in his expression as he traced her face with his beautiful green eyes._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Before she could even register, Mary’s lips gently crashed against hers, deepening the kiss as he caressed her cheek. She gladly gave into his touch but had to remind herself of his condition as his tongue brushed against her bottom lip._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“As much as I want to do this, we can’t.” Wendy pulled back to look at his face for a moment, a tinge of fear washing over him. “I just don’t want you to hurt yourself if things get too intense, that’s all.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Are you sure that’s all; I mean, I understand if you—”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Mary I want…” Wendy paused as a blush crept into her cheeks. “I want you, that has never changed, but right now in this hospital bathroom is not ideal. And we still need to talk about everything.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“So let’s talk.” He sighed as she opened the door and gently ushered him back to his bed. “After your cast.” Wendy nodded. Though dissatisfied with this idea he agreed, not questioning her further._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________While Mary was wheeled to another room for his cast, Wendy was left with her own thoughts and fears. She had professed every feeling and thought she had ever had about Mary in the voicemails and during his sedation. Even if she could gather the confidence to say it again, what if maybe Mary was just extra emotional with all the trauma and had misplaced his feelings? What if? There were too many ‘what if’s?’ racing around in her mind. Before she could get too lost, Jan knocked on the door and quietly entered not to wake a possible sleeping Mary._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Where’s the little fucker off to now?” Jan chuckled as she surveyed the room empty of Mary and sat a vase of red roses down on his bedside table._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Oh, he is gone getting his cast.” Wendy stood up, her bottom lip quivering, the emotions from the day washing over her again. “He…he’ll be back soon.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“You OK, sweetie?” Jan opened her arms gladly pulling Wendy in for a much-needed hug. “I almost lost him, Jan.” She sobbed as her body shook violently. “But you didn’t, sweetheart; his stubborn ass can’t die.” Jan chuckled at herself before squeezing her friend tighter. “Let’s go get a coffee, you don’t want Mare to come back to this, do you?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“No.” Wendy sniffled as Jan pulled away and opened the door, holding it for Dee as she walked past with her wallet in hand. Luckily they missed Mary by a few minutes as they slipped off to the cafeteria one floor down. It was mostly empty leaving them to have a nice view of the outdoor area._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________With two cups of hot coffee they sat by the window to look at the patients and hospital personnel walking the grounds on a perfectly sunny fall day._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“I was informed that the guy who hit him, he totally ran the stop sign.” Dee took a deep breath and continued her fixed gaze on the people below. “Mary’s side took the brunt of the impact. They said if the car had been positioned just two inches further it would have killed him on impact.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Son of a bitch.” Jan huffed. “I know you said it was bad, but—”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“I didn’t want you to worry, you had stuff going on with Jack’s family. It’s fine, Mary is fine…now, anyway.” Wendy shook her head._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Well, aside from the broken arm, what else?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“He’s got a lot of bruising over his body, mild head concussion, stitches above his left eye and bruised ribs.” Wendy lost it again at the ribs and began to sob silently, holding her head in her hands as her coffee cooled on the table._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Damnit, I love him so much, Jan. But this is all my fault—if I hadn’t called.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“I had never seem him smile so big when he got the voicemails, Dee.” Jan wiped her own eyes. “He jumped up from his spot at dinner. I’m dead serious, he ran out the door to as he said ‘get the girl’ like some 90s rom com Casanova. He was the happiest he had been in the last little bit. But you have to understand that it is _not _your fault. It’s that asshole who didn’t stop. You didn’t cause this, Dee. It was just unfortunate timing.”___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________“And as much as I feel for you, you have got to pull yourself up by your bootstraps to handle all of this. Mary needs you now more than ever, to be his rock both emotionally and physically. He might be a hard ass, but trauma like this is serious business and he needs a strong partner to get through it.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________Jan pat Dee’s thigh sympathetically before standing. “Let’s get a refill and head back to the room to wait for your man.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________“He’s not my man.” Dee smirked. “Oh, shut up, you, there’s no denying it now.” Jan giggled. “Shall we get some coffee for Mare too?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________“Ah, better get decaf. He needs to rest as much as he can.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________An extra coffee in hand, they walked back to the room surprised to see Mary resting comfortably against the pillows now dawning a black cast running from his upper arm down to his knuckles._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________“Hey.” He yawned as he turned his head towards the door, a sleepy smile on his cheeks. “Hey shit head, how ya feelin’?” Jan grinned and took a seat by his bed while Dee sat his coffee on the swivel tray by his free arm. “Sight for sore eyes, they tell me I’m gonna live.” Mary smirked before reaching for the cup._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________“Don’t get too excited, it’s decaf, Mare.” Wendy warned. “What the hell, Dee; the doctor didn’t even say anything about it.” Mary grumbled. “Did you ask?” “Well…no, but still.” He protested._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________“You were sedated for a reason and I don’t want you getting the jitters or your heart rate going up.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________Mary looked at Wendy’s face for a moment noting that her cheeks were freshly puffy, and eyes glazed._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________“Have you been crying?” Mary furrowed his brows as he grabbed her hand and pulled her down to sit on the bed to examine her face further. The coffee decaf or regular was the least of his concern._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________“I’m fine.” She waved it off. “Dee, wh-what’s going on?” Mary had become persistent since waking, not happy to take half ass answers or excuses. He come too close to death, and now was not time to do anything halfway._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________“I just feel bad…” Dee huffed. “Look at me,” Mary lifted her chin with his finger, so she was right in his gaze. “None of this was your fault, Dee, I promise. Don’t cry about what wasn’t lost, celebrate the here and now. I’m here, right now…and I’m not goin’ anywhere except home with you…well, when they let me.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________Jan’s jaw almost dropped at Mary’. This accident must’ve really shaken him up, she thought; or maybe he was finally relaxed and unafraid now that all the cards had been laid on the table. In all the years Jan had known him he had _never _talked to another girl this way.___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________“I hope it’s soon.” Dee bit the inside of her lip as he caressed her cheek. “It’s not the same without you there…”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________“You know, I think I want that pack of skittles after all.” Jan stood up awkwardly. “I’m gonna go back to the cafeteria and grab some; I’ll get somethin’ for you guys too.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________Before either of them could respond Jan was out the door and down the hall, leaving Mary and Dee to really talk for the first time…_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter may have seemed uneventful, but the awkwardness between them has been rightfully earned at this point.


	24. The Talk

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright...so a tiny bit of smut since I think Mary, Wendy and the rest of us deserve it. Not exactly what we were expecting, but it seems pretty par for the course.

“So I guess that’s our cue to talk, huh?” Dee rolled her eyes and her lips tugged into a smile while Mary dropped his hand, but only to lace his fingers with hers. “We’ve been dancin’ around it, baby doll. It’s time.” 

The silence plagued them for the longest time, both having so much more to say, but neither one brave enough to say it. Wendy finally forced herself to be first, however, since Mary had previously been the one to always speak up. 

“I don’t want you to be my housemate anymore.” Dee bit her lip and looked down at their hands for a moment as Mary swallowed hard. The color almost seemed to fade from his skin as she looked at him, faced with a heartbroken expression. “No, no.” She squeezed his hand. “I mean every single word of what I said in those voicemails and while you were sedated. Every single word. But what I mean is, I want you to be my roommate…literally.” 

The blush crept to her cheeks again as she stuttered over her words for a moment, embarrassed that she was confessing her desires. “When you come home…I want…um, I—I want you to sleep with me.” Wendy almost choked on her words. “No, I mean…I, uh, in the same bed…sex would be nice. But we don’t have to again…if you don’t want to—what am I even saying?” 

Mary was more than amused to see her so desperately choking on her words. By the time she stopped speaking her cheeks were pink with embarrassment as she looked everywhere but at his face hoping he would grant her some grace through her most ungraceful speech. 

“I just, I want you home. I don’t want to feel a million miles away from you when you’re right next to me. I want to be in your world. When you wrap your arms around me, I want to feel confident and even more safe. I want to stop being afraid.” A nerve wracking confidence began to erupt from her mouth as she looked at their hands. “And you know what, yeah, I do want sex. I want a lot of sex…I’ve waited for you for two years and there’s a lot to make up for!” Just as soon as her voice seemed confident, she began to falter, her face practically burning. 

“But…if you have uh, um, other partners—I just, I ask that you please not bring them home.” Wendy wanted to die right on the spot. 

“There won’t be anyone else.” Mary replied instantly and squeezed her hand in assurance, at the same time trying to hold back a little grin at her outburst of honesty. “I can’t believe I’m sayin’ it, because I never thought I’d feel this way, but you are all I want and need. There will be no other, period. I hope you feel the same…about me.” He swallowed nervously. 

“There hasn’t been anyone for two years, Mare…everything I want is right in front of me.” 

“So we are monogamous then…” He cocked his head to the side as he squinted his eye, considering his words. “I thought it would seem so restricting, but it actually feels kinda comforting.” He spoke aloud. 

“Mare,” Wendy squeezed his hand back. “you’ve experienced a lot of trauma and I want you to know that I won’t hold it against you if you change your mind…about everything. In fact, I probably deserve it” 

“I have waited two years to have you. I mean everything I’m sayin’, baby doll.” He paused for a moment. “And the sex thing, as your _boyfriend _I’m happy to help make up for all the unfortunately lost orgasms. Fuckin’ travesty to say the least.”__

__“Boyfriend?” Wendy almost whispered in shock. It sounded so weird to hear Mary call himself her _boyfriend _.___ _

____“Well, yeah, what else am I gonna be?” He attempted to shrug. “I want a fuckin’ label. I’m your guy, you’re my girl…and we were best friends before this, so…boyfriend and girlfriend.”_ _ _ _

____“You just…you never really seemed like one for labels before; I didn’t think you—”_ _ _ _

____“Because I never cared about anyone enough to think about what I might be to them; I fuckin’ care about you…I love you.” Mary paused. “Unless you’re not into the label thing…”_ _ _ _

____“No, no, I am.” Wendy tried to contain her smile. “It feels right; but I’ve spent a lot of time only daydreaming it, never really thinking it would reality.”_ _ _ _

____“Well, it is, baby doll. You’re not gettin’ rid of me no matter how hard you try. Arguments, silent treatment, even if I piss you off, I’m like a damn vampire; you invite me in, I stick around.”_ _ _ _

____“Be my vampire all you want, Mare; I’ll never want you to leave.” Wendy smirked, though it quickly faded. “I wish we didn’t have that argument though, or those days apart…I hate the way I treated you. I was scared and wanted to push you away.”_ _ _ _

____“Me either.” Mary looked down. “It was the worst three days of my life, being away from you. Felt like someone ripped my heart out, and not in some cool grotesque way either; but I understand why you did it. Truthfully we both kinda fucked up, you know, communicating and shit.”_ _ _ _

____Wendy screwed her eyes tight to keep the tears from falling as she thought back on the last few days. “We can’t change the past, but we can have one helluva future.” Mary spoke softly and pulled on her hand prompting Wendy to open her eyes. “Don’t look back at all of that, just focus on what’s right in front of you.”_ _ _ _

____Wendy looked at him, grateful that her future seemed so perfect in the most beautiful and imperfect way._ _ _ _

____“You gonna kiss me now or what?” Mary smirked while he asked in the most Mary Goore way. “I ain’t dyin’ and you won’t break me.” He didn’t have to ask again as Wendy sat on the small space of the bed by Mary’s hip and gently dipped her face close to his for a sweet kiss. Of course, Mary had to be over the top and deepen the kiss as his hand found its way to the nape of her neck, pulling her closer. His tongue brushed her bottom lip yet again, only this time she granted the invitation and parted her lips ever so slightly for his glorious warm tongue to explore her mouth like some secret land. Their tongues danced together in sloppy but perfect time while the rest of the world faded away for a moment._ _ _ _

____Feeling the need for something more, Wendy casually placed her hand on his thigh. With each movement she inched her fingertips closer and closer to the inside of his thigh, until she brushed his half hardened member. Taking the opportunity, because why fucking not, it was long over due; Wendy gently squeezed as the blood rushed through his body, settling in one place. Mary’s breathing hitched slightly as she squeezed again, his cock completely hard from just a simple move. He wasn’t surprised, it had been more than a week since they last fucked._ _ _ _

____“Do…do you mind?” Wendy breathed as she pulled away for a moment, her eyes meeting his._ _ _ _

____“It’s not fair.” Mary breathed careful not to irritated his ribs. “What about you?”_ _ _ _

____“Right now my pleasure comes from giving you pleasure.” She smiled. “I want you to feel good, you deserve it.”_ _ _ _

____“So do you.”_ _ _ _

____“Worry about that when we get home.”_ _ _ _

____Needing her touch, Mary barely nodded as she gently pulled on his sweats, springing his cock free of the fabric. She didn’t even hesitate as she gripped his length before thumbing over the head to gather the pre that had spilled. Mary shuttered at the sensation when she began stroking him._ _ _ _

____“Fuck, baby doll, that feels—mmm…that feels fuckin’ good.”_ _ _ _

____He looked so vulnerable, so sexy, so desperate for her touch with his eyes screwed shut and head lolled back against the pillows. An unexpected moan escaped his lips after a particularly generous stroke of his head, and Wendy’s eyes darted towards the door._ _ _ _

____“Shhh…I know it feels good, but I really would rather not have a nurse walk in on us.” Wendy spoke softly as she continued her ministrations._ _ _ _

____“S-sorry.” Mary breathed, his chest heaving slightly more than before has she quickened her pace._ _ _ _

____Just as that tingly feeling began to creep its way up his feet, there was a knock at the door._ _ _ _

____“You guys decent?” Jan laughed on the other side, though not entirely joking._ _ _ _

____Panicked, Wendy quickly helped Mary pull up his sweats and he moved his knees in a bended position to hide the throbbing between his thighs. Fucks sake, it had been a week, he was almost fuckin’ there…and now Jan was the one doing the cock blocking._ _ _ _

____“I’m sorry, Mare.” Wendy looked wearily, knowing just how much pain he was in, on top of the already present trauma. “We’ll finish what we started tonight, I promise.”_ _ _ _

____“It’s OK.” Mary squeezed her hand. “It sucks, but I think I’ll survive.”_ _ _ _

____“Yeah well…”_ _ _ _

____“I really fucking hope you’re decent because I’d rather not see something I can’t unsee today.” Jan finally pushed the door open while still covering her eyes._ _ _ _

____“Ah, c’mon, Jan; not like you ain’t seen somethin’ like this before.” Mary smirked, quickly turning the situation around as Jan dropped her hand, to see nothing more than them sitting on the bed, thankfully. “Why don’t you stay a little while; I’m starving, maybe we can grab somethin’ to eat.”_ _ _ _

____“I could eat.” She nodded. “But first, is there anything you two would like to tell me?”_ _ _ _

____Mary and Wendy both looked at each other and shrugged before shaking their heads and laughing like guilty children. However Wendy was a nervous wreck on the inside. A few seconds long and they would’ve been caught red handed…or, well, dick handed._ _ _ _

____“You two fuckin’ suck, you know that?” Jan huffed into a small smile. “What kind of food do you want, Goore; anything at all, hospital or not, my treat.”_ _ _ _

____They both agreed it was hilarious to see her squirm at the unconfirmed relationship and kept tight lipped about it all through Jan’s visit. She finally gave up prodding and enjoyed the company of her two great friends before excusing herself to meet Jack for dinner late that evening._ _ _ _

____“Mm…what a day.” Mary yawned. “What a day indeed.” Wendy agreed before reclining her chair to snuggle up with a white hospital blanket. They had both agreed that he was just too tired to pick up where they left off after Jan’s interruption. Between the sedation, cast and very present injuries, he was content just being near _his girl _._ _ _ _ __

____“Think doc will let me have regular coffee tomorrow?” Mary asked after a lengthy silence, making Wendy giggle. “Might be able to sweet talk one of the nurses into giving you a small cup; turn on the Goore charm and they’ll probably bring the whole pot.”_ _ _ _

____“I only wanna turn that charm on you for you, baby.” He smiled as he closed his eyes. “But right now I’m gonna rest for a little while.”_ _ _ _

____Mary ended up sleeping the rest of the night, only getting up to pee once around 3. Wendy was hot on his trail, walking him to the bathroom door and waiting just outside to make sure she could hear him if he fell. Thankfully uneventful, they returned to their restful spots until the next morning._ _ _ _

____“Everything OK?” Wendy yawned quietly as the nurse checked the monitors while Mary still slept. “Everything is just fine, Ms. Duval; doc wants to take him off the IV drip in a couple of hours and probably remove the port later today. I’d say he’s looking at going home tomorrow afternoon if all continues as plan.”_ _ _ _

____“That’s wonderful news.” Wendy smiled quietly. “I hate to bother you further, but can he have coffee with breakfast this morning, at least just a small cup?”_ _ _ _

____The nurse smiled over at his sleeping body and shook her head._ _ _ _

____“I don’t see why not; his stats are good. I’ll talk to doc though and clear it.”_ _ _ _

____“Thank you, I appreciate that.” Wendy nodded as the nurse scribbled something else in his chart before disappearing._ _ _ _

____A few minutes later Wendy was startled to hear Mary’s groggy voice. “Mm, thanks for asking, babe.” He mumbled before licking his lips and turning his head still in and out of sleep before ultimately remaining in slumber._ _ _ _

____He seemed so sweet in his sleepy state. Wendy couldn’t help but to grin as she looked down at the blanket in her lap, soon joining him in sleep for the next little while before breakfast was served…with coffee._ _ _ _


	25. Welcome Home, Goore

It wasn’t the afternoon that next day as the nurse had hoped, but Mary was released later that evening. They were lucky too; he had become quite irritable waiting around all day for some stupid paperwork and last-minute tests. Though the nurses on this floor were exceptionally nice, he grumbled when he got in the car about how he hoped he never saw them again, especially after they insisted on wheeling him out all the way to the car. 

Meanwhile, Wendy was never so happy to see him look like a wet cat with a snarl on his face as he buckled his seatbelt. That shitty attitude meant he was one step closer to normalcy. He could be as shitty as he wanted, and she would’ve smiled. 

“Now the only nurse you have to deal with is me, Mr. Goore.” Wendy grinned before carefully backing out of the parking space. “When you say nurse, does this include one of those little outfits; because—” 

“Only time will tell. Said possible outfit is reserved specifically for a good patient.” 

“I promise I’ll be the best damn patient, _Nurse Duval _.” Mary purred as he sat back in his seat getting as comfortable as possible for the ride home. “Mm, that has a slight ring to it, doesn’t it?” She grinned but kept her eyes on the road while he nodded mischievously. They had barely just figured out what they were and here she sat with Mary making roleplay jokes with him just out of the hospital. Ah, how the cookie crumbles.__

__Not wanting to disappoint, though she had never done anything of the sort, Wendy made a mental note to order the silly costume with the hope it would make a bad day better in the coming weeks. Her thoughts were interrupted as they came to a four-way stop._ _

__She noticed Mary swallowed hard as he white knuckled what he could grip of the black leather on his door. His face paled instantly as he flicked his eyes in every direction, flash backs of his accident plaguing his mind. Thankfully they were the only ones at this stop, but it didn’t stop Mary’s anxiety from being any worse. Dee had never seen him so anxious and vulnerable. Mary was a hard ass most of the time and soft when it counted…but never scared._ _

__“Slow deep breaths, Mare.” Wendy spoke softly as she drove down the empty street, thankful to be through the four way. Mary took a few deep breaths, wincing at the pain each time, which caused him to heave into bursts of small panicked breaths._ _

__“Mary, listen to me, try to breath the best that you can. I want you to look around right now and tell me five things you can see.”_ _

__“I…that’s stupid…I can’t—I…I’m fine.” Mary’s chest still heaved as he took survey of their surroundings, afraid he might just stop breathing all together. “Just five things, that’s all.” Wendy made her voice gentle through the panic she too felt._ _

__“Uh, a green-house with black shutters.” He took a strangled breath. “Er…a…uh…black car and an ice cream truck.” His chest still heaved as he dug his nails into the leather still searching for resolve from a feeling he’d never felt._ _

__“Two more things, Mare.”_ _

__Mary continued to survey the area, his eyes falling on a house covered in Halloween decorations. He wanted to smile, but the pain and anxiety limited him greatly. “Pumpkins and bats.”_ _

__“Good,” Wendy nodded. “Now, tell me about four things you can feel right now, physically.”_ _

__“Leather…plastic.” He took a quick sharp breath before letting it out as slowly as he could at the time. “Cotton—you.”_ _

__Mary finally removed his hand from the door and reached down to touch the gentle hand on his thigh. His breathes seemed less sporadic as he ran his fingers over her soft knuckles, taking in the sensation of her skin._ _

__“Tell me three things you can hear, Mare.” Wendy squeezed his thigh just enough to keep his attention. “Your voice…my voice and the car.”_ _

__His breathing had practically returned to normal as he laced his fingers with hers in an awkward, yet comfortable position._ _

__“Two things you can smell?”_ _

__Mary smiled wearily as he pulled her wrist up to his nose to take in the scent of her. “Candy corn and musk.” Surprisingly he didn’t twist in disgust at the candy corn. “Never thought I would like the smell of candy corn.”_ _

__“Hm, maybe you’ll actually eat it now.”_ _

__“Not a fuckin’ chance, baby doll.” Mary twisted his lips for a moment before pecking the bend of her wrist. “I love you, but I’m not eating that stuff.”_ _

__Her heart fluttered at his words. It was easy but strange to hear coming from his lips._ _

__“I love you too.” Wendy bit her lip as a smile formed at the corner of his mouth._ _

__He felt entirely embarrassed but thankful for Wendy. Mary had never experienced whatever that was, before. That helplessness and impending doom clawing its way through his body scared him. Mary hated not having control of things, especially of himself. He hated that Wendy had to talk him down. It was embarrassing to be weak in front of her. At the same time, he somehow loved her more for talking him through it without ever batting an eye. She never mentioned another thing about it the rest of the drive home. But they both felt a sense of relief wash over them as she parked the car safely in her usual spot._ _

__“Ready to go home?” Wendy looked over to Mary, a worried smile on her face. “Fuck, yes.” Mary beat her out of the car, steadying himself against it for a moment before walking ahead, only a slight limp accompanying him._ _

__Wendy quickly grabbed their bags and sprinted to catch up with him as he stepped into the breezeway. “I am way too out of shape to be chasing after you like this.” Wendy huffed as they reached the door. “Nah, I’m just eager. Necessity is the best motivator.” Mary smirked._ _

__Walking inside for the first time in just over a week, Mary smiled the biggest Wendy had witnessed since they went to see Metallica together for her first time. He was genuinely happy as he scanned the living room that seemed to be perfectly untouched. It smelled like home, it smelled like Wendy._ _

__“Now this is more like it.” Mary let out a slow content sigh before flopping down on the couch, carefully, of course. He surveyed the living room yet again, this time his eyes landing on his acoustic guitar sitting pretty on its stand; the same acoustic guitar he had played when he snapped at Wendy not long ago._ _

__It wasn’t difficult to assume the many things he probably thought, between remembering their little exchange and the realization that he wouldn’t be able to play for a good two to three months. Mary had never not been able to play no matter how badly he might have hurt himself; he was always back after a week or less._ _

__“Hey, how about some coffee and a treat while I make dinner.” Wendy smiled nervously, pulling him from his thoughts. “Wh…yeah, that would be cool; or you could just order some Chinese food and spend some time with me, baby doll.”_ _

__Wendy could hear it in his voice just how meek he felt, beginning to realize his own injuries. Though it broke her heart, she didn’t mind one bit that Mary needed her._ _

__“Alright, I’ll go make coffee and call our favorite place; usual order for you?”_ _

__“Yeah...” A smile tugged at the corner of his mouth as he gently bent forward to grab the TV remote. “I’ll find a couple of movies.”_ _

__Wendy went on about making coffee and grabbing some chess bars from the fridge. She smiled, proud of herself that she managed to think ahead and grabbed a box from their local bakery. Anything she thought might make Mary happy, she tried to grab or do. After a call to the restaurant, Wendy pulled a breakfast tray from a cabinet and carefully stacked the coffee and bars._ _

__“Good choice.” Wendy nodded towards the screen as she sat the tray down. “We haven’t watched this together before, so I thought why not.” Mary grinned wearily as the credits for ‘Waxwork’ began to roll._ _

__“Mmm…my favorite.” A continued grinned displayed itself on his face as he grabbed a chess bar for a bite. “They’re good.” He swallowed. “But these aren’t yours, are they?”_ _

__“No, I’m sorry.” Wendy’s expression fell. “I just didn’t have the time with getting everything ready for you to come home. I can go make some if you like?”_ _

__“Baby doll, listen to yourself.” Mary chuckled softly. “You thought about me, that’s all that matters to me. These are good, they ain’t as good as yours, but they are good.”_ _

__Wendy twisted her lips and nodded before sitting back on the couch. Mary never got too worked up about anything like this and Wendy didn’t care either way when he was _just _Mary; but he wasn’t _just _Mary anymore, he was her boyfriend, partner, significant other... A switch had flipped in her head, causing a fear to rise in her chest, just like the fear she used to have with her previous partner. He wasn’t very nice, and everything had to be just so. He would have insisted that Wendy go make them fresh and also scolded her for trying to cut corners._____ _

______“Hey,” Mary placed his hand over hers, noticing just how tense she had become a few minutes into the movie. “talk to me, what’s goin’ on in that mind of yours, Dee?”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Nothing, I’m fine.” Wendy attempted to put on a convincing smile. “No you’re not, Dee; I know that look, somethin’ is botherin’ you.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“I’m just tired.” She shrugged, hoping that would be more convincing. “Guess I need to drink more coffee, huh?”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Her voice was laced with a tinge of nervousness that Mary couldn’t shake, but Wendy was firm on her attempt to remain just so. Though she wasn’t telling the full truth, he acknowledge that she had slept much less than he during the last four days. It wasn’t far off to think that she would sleep even less with him home. She should’ve seemed relaxed; but looked to be on the brink._ _ _ _ _ _

______“So, when do you go back to work?” Mary asked, making casual conversation though it wasn’t the best topic. “Oh, well, I took a month off, sort of.” She shrugged. “Sort of?” He arched his brow. “Yeah, I mean, I’m working from home doing video appointments; so I’m not really off, just a lightened load at home. I never take off for much of anything, and Delilah was happy to do this for me.” Wendy paused. “And if you want me to take off longer I’m sure I can.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“If I can’t function in a month, then there’s no hope for me.” Mary chuckled softly. “I think that should be more than fine…thank you, seriously, for takin’ care of me.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Wendy just smiled and nodded before looking back at the TV. Thankfully dinner was delivered just a few moments after they both finished their coffee. It was a welcomed intrusion given the awkward silence plaguing them both. Mary and Wendy never acted this way around each other. What they both feared about change slowly seemed to be coming true, at least for Wendy._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Always tastes better when you use chopsticks.” Mary quipped before shoving a bite of noodles into his mouth. “It really does.” Wendy agreed quietly._ _ _ _ _ _

______“That’s it.” Mary huffed as he sat the chopsticks down and grabbed the remote to pause the movie. “What the fuck is going on, Dee; you’re being way too quiet.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“I’m fine.” Wendy chewed on the inside of her lip before looking back to her half empty plate. “No you’re not, Dee; is it about the accident, is it me…is it _us _.”___ _ _ _ _ _

________She knew there was no way to get past this without going through it and explained to Mary just why she had been so quiet all evening. Taking a deep breath she sat her chopsticks down as well before glancing at his worried but soft expression._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“It’s us…”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“What about us; I thought things were going just fine, aside from the fucked-up breathing thing earlier.” Mary furrowed his brows. “What’s up?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“It’s not like I mean to, but I can’t help to think about how things were before…before you. I’ve never told you about my ex, not really—”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“You told me enough to know he is an asshole who never fuckin’ deserved you.” Mary grumbled in distain._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“If this had been him instead of you, he would have scolded me for cutting corners by buying the chess bars instead of making them—”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Dee,” Mary sighed. “I said that as a compliment to you; Mary Goore ain’t that good at nice words as you know; I’m trying to do better, especially for you. I’m sorry if I hurt you.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“No,” Wendy shook her head. “it’s not you, it’s me. I just had a little bit of a flashback.” She paused. “After him I closed myself off from the world emotionally and intimately to avoid something like that again.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“And there I was being a fuckin’ jerk not long ago over a fuckin’ song.” Mary screwed his eyes shut for a moment. “Dee, I want you to know somethin’ right now…I may screw up sometimes, I might make you cry, but I will try my fuckin’ best to make you happy when I can. I will always appreciate what you do for me, even when you don’t wanna do it.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“And I appreciate that, Mare. I guess we both have some things to work on; my head has to catch up to my heart in some departments. But my focus right now is taking care of you and making you as comfortable as I can.” Wendy smiled softly._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“I don’t deserve you.” Mary huffed. “Yes…you do.” Wendy squeezed his hand gently as they looked at each other._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________For the first time, Mary believed it. There was a passion, a determined look in her eyes that he had seen only once before, and that was just a few days before in the hospital. Though he winced at the pain, Mary leaned a little closer, prompting Wendy to move in for a gentle kiss._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“I wish we could cuddle.” Mary groaned softly before stealing another small peck. “Soon enough, Mr. Goore.” Wendy smiled again, this time a little less nervous than before._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _


	26. I'll Sleep When I'm Dead

With the food eaten and first movie finished both Dee and Mary grew tired from the day’s events. 

“I think I need a hot shower and the second movie in bed.” Mary yawned. “That sounds nice.” Wendy agreed before disappearing with the dishes and takeout containers. 

“You know,” She walked back into the living room just as Mary was standing. “you might fare better with a bubble bath, with the whole standing and cast issue. Might be a little relaxing, even for Mary Goore.” 

He could see just how kind her expression was, the desire to help practically bursting from her pores as Mary nodded slightly, giving in to the idea though it was another first for him. Wendy smiled as if she had accomplished something massive as they walked through the apartment to her bedroom. 

“I don’t remember that blanket.” Mary observed the black and white skull pattern of the fabric all nice and neat on what would now be his side of the bed. “It’s new…I thought you might like something different for recovery.” 

“It’s great, Dee.” He mustered a smile and a nod before following her to the bathroom. 

While he carefully kicked off his sneakers, Wendy went on about filling the tub with a nice fruity bubble bath after adjusting the water to a perfect temperature.

“A little help here…” Mary grunted as he got himself bound in the fabric of his shirt, both arms sticking in different directions. Wendy couldn’t help but to giggle as she helped the fabric over his shoulders and head. He still seemed so vulnerable as she looked him in the eyes. Through all of the bruising and stitches, he still looked handsome, his hair falling in his face as he twisted his lips bashfully. Her heart fluttered at his cute expression and the blush crept to her cheeks. 

The bruising on his torso still held strong with hues of red and purple gracing the skin over his ribs. It broke Wendy’s heart, but she had no time to consider the boiling emotions as she stood to the side and practically broke her neck looking the opposite direction while helping him shimmy out of his sweatpants and boxers. 

“Really not how I imagined somethin’ like this going down.” Mary huffed. “Maybe not, but I haven’t seen anything but your ass, so don’t sweat it.” 

“You mean to tell me you haven’t looked, not even once?” Mary arched his brow as Wendy walked him over to the tub. “Well, aside from our little moment that Jan spoiled…no; and it’s not because I don’t want to…I just respect that you’re in a compromising situation and it’s unfair.” 

“As much as I appreciate the respect, I don’t care if you look, baby doll…it’s not like you ain’t seen it all before.” Mary winced at the hot water as he steadied against the wall and Wendy’s shoulder while stepping into the tub. 

“Too hot?” 

“No, just right.” He sighed both at the pain and the pleasure while finally seated in the water, surrounded by a sea of bubbles. 

“On the previous topic, is my ass bruised like the rest of my body?” Mary chuckled while propping his cast up on the side of the tub. 

Wendy blushed again and chewed on her lip for a moment before sitting down beside the tub, resting her arm beside his. 

“You’re such a hard ass, Goore, nothing could bruise it.” Wendy giggled. “Still nice and round as always.” 

“That’s right, babe, and it’s all yours.” Mary grinned as the blush darkened on her cheeks. “No need to be embarrassed, because I’ve been lookin’ too; just as nice and round, perfect in fact.” 

At the same time Wendy wanted to die of embarrassment, because she wasn’t familiar with such a forward partner, she was rather intrigued. Though the prospect of anything intimate between them again seemed to be lightyears away with his current condition, she could fantasize until that day, right? They _did _need to pick up where they left off earlier…__

__The silence plagued them for a moment as Mary sat back, the bubbles surrounding just under his chest. He looked down at the bruise on his arm, increasingly restless and nervous all at once. He had so much he wanted to say, or more so, do._ _

__“Dee…” Mary sat up and looked over the lip of the tub at this sweet creature with her back to him. “I really hate asking, but can you help me with my hair?”_ _

__Wendy tried to tame her smile as she turned around to be met by the stare of his green eyes. Nothing more was said while Dee grabbed his usual bottle of shampoo and conditioner combo and a plastic cup from the tray beside her._ _

__“Close your eyes, Mare.” Wendy instructed before dipping the cup and pouring the warm water over his head. “Again.” Mary braced himself keeping his eyes shut at her movements._ _

__“Mm…feels nice.” He acknowledged as she began working the shampoo into his scalp. Her fingers and nails were pure pleasure as Mary’s head lolled slightly forward enjoying the moment of pure intimacy. “Good, I aim to please.” Wendy grinned to herself. “You do, baby doll, you do.”_ _

__“Don’t go falling asleep on me, Goore, still have to rinse.” She giggled, drawing a small groan from him. With his hair rinsed and gently slicked back, she moved on to wash his back in ever so delicate movements._ _

__“This sucks, the whole thing of not being able to do it all myself,” Mary paused as she rinsed his back and wiped her hands on a nearby towel. “But I wouldn’t want anyone else doin’ this for me.”_ _

__“I wouldn’t want anyone else doing this for you either.” Wendy shrugged. “So I guess we both win this time, huh?”_ _

__Mary grinned that adorable crooked grin and nodded slightly before finishing the task at hand. Wendy gave him his privacy, standing just outside the open door until he called her to help him dry off and move to bed._ _

__If the mountain of pillows had been people, Mary would have ripped every single one of them apart. It took more than a few minutes to get him comfortable as he cursed every deep breath between the injuries and the irritation of movement._ _

__“Dee, I swear I ain’t mad at you, it’s just hard to get comfortable.” Mary sighed as she got him settled in just right with pillows adjusted all around his body just right. He was practically sitting up right, but at a slight curve. Nonetheless he was comfortable and that’s all that mattered._ _

__“I know, Mare, it’s OK.” Wendy breathed softly as she laid the skull blanket out just under his arms. “Are you good on your own while I shower?”_ _

__“I’m just fine here, baby doll, I promise.” Mary yawned again. “I’ll be out soon.” She smiled and kissed his forehead, careful not to touch his stitches. “Take your time, sweetness; you deserve a minute to yourself having to deal with me. Relax.”_ _

__Ugh, the way _relax _rolled off his tongue accompanied by that charming expression, Wendy could just imagine his face between her thighs, reminding her to sit back and…relax. Fucking fuck.___ _

____Truth was she couldn’t relax though, not until he was feeling better. She would shower as quickly as possible, worried he might fall out of the bed and she wouldn’t be there to hear it. Lucky for her Mary had fallen asleep by the time that she reemerged fresh from the bathroom in her black panties and an oversized t-shirt. She smiled at his rested expression and carefully climbed into bed beside him. In the pitch blackness of the room, her fingers still found their way to the pulse point of his wrist, a sign of life she had come to find comfort in. Nothing more needed to be said as she fell asleep, though this beautiful rest wouldn’t last for long. Anytime Mary moved even the slightness or cleared his throat, she was awake. Going on almost a week of minimal sleep was exhausting to say the least, but she welcomed this experience, because it meant that Mary was alive. She would take that any day so long as he was there with her._ _ _ _

____“Wh-what do you need?” Wendy mumbled and looked through half lidded eyes as Mary groaned and pulled himself from the bed. The ache was almost too much to bear, especially in his ribs. “Just goin’ to take a piss, s’all good. Go back to sleep.”_ _ _ _

____“Do you need help to walk?” Wendy asked which made Mary chuckle softly. “Baby, I promise if I need help I’ll tell you. I can at least walk; now go back to sleep, alright?”_ _ _ _

____Wendy couldn’t fight the idea of sleep as she nodded and laid her head back down. Though she still listened in her dazed state. Mary soon reentered the room and grabbed a bottle of Tylenol from the nightstand, popping a few in his mouth before finding a somewhat comfortable position in bed again. It was just past five and he was in no hurry to get up and start the day, especially with no place to be._ _ _ _

____A few minutes into wiggling around he found a tolerable position and closed his eyes. “Need anything?” Wendy asked. “I need you to sleep, baby doll. I’m sore, but I’m not totally helpless, I swear. Get some rest so you can take care of my ass later.”_ _ _ _

____Sleeping just past seven, Wendy made herself get up and start the day. Mary seemed to be resting comfortable with the pain relivers in his system, so she left him there to sleep, hesitantly, but she didn’t have the heart to wake him just yet. He needed sleep much worse than she did._ _ _ _

____Pumping herself full of dark roast coffee, she began the day, just like she would every day for the next few until he had been home for a full week. Mary began to notice even more just how tired she looked. She slept less than him and he was the one with the bruised ribs. No movement went unnoticed by Wendy and her body paid for it. The dark rings under her blood shot eyes were testament to that. If she didn’t get some sleep sometime soon, she would either pass out or lose her fucking mind, then they would both be in trouble. She was tense, tired, and emotionally spent._ _ _ _

____\-----_ _ _ _

____“Jan, hey, it’s Mary.” Mary spoke in a hushed whisper as he held the phone to his ear, keeping lookout while Dee was away for a shower one evening. “Mary…is everything ok; why are you whispering?”_ _ _ _

____“She hasn’t slept well since we got home, Jan; I swear she hasn’t slept a full twenty-four hours since the accident. Never lets me out of her sight and forces coffee down her throat like crack; she needs some rest or she’s gonna lose it.”_ _ _ _

____“Poor thing.” Jan sighed. “Why don’t I come over tomorrow morning and hang out for a while, get her to loosen up a bit; might help you both…I know she can be a little over-bearing sometimes, especially when she cares this much.”_ _ _ _

____Mary sighed in relief and agreed._ _ _ _

____“Shit, she’s coming; I’ll see you tomorrow.” Mary spoke quickly before hanging up and shoving the phone in the drawer of the nightstand._ _ _ _

____Wendy smiled sleepily in her usual pajama get up and climbed into bed after turning off the lights. “Need anything, Mare?”_ _ _ _

____“Just you.” He smiled in the dark, glad his weary eyes were hidden as his hand searched for hers. “Get some sleep, baby doll.”_ _ _ _

____“I’ll sleep when I’m dead.” She yawned. “Don’t say that Dee; you have to live forever, that’s what you signed up for when you ended up with me.” He said, making her giggle. “Then I’ll live forever if that’s what you want.”_ _ _ _

____Mary pulled her hand up to his lips and gave it a gentle peck before laying it back down at his side. “Sleep well, sweetness.”_ _ _ _

____Before he could even finish his last word Wendy had fallen asleep, but, of course, not for long…_ _ _ _


	27. Morning Glory

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some lazy early morning smut for Mary.

The next morning Mary actually woke before Wendy. She looked incredibly peaceful though he knew the moment his feet hit the floor she would be on it. He was right, of course. 

“Just goin’ to take a leak, baby doll.” Mary yawned before she could speak. Wendy sleepily nodded before turning the opposite way to milk just a few more moments. 

Popping a few pain relievers into his mouth, Mary was ready to start the day. Though it had been just a week that he had been home, his body felt slightly better after so much rest. Still sore, especially his ribs, he could at least move more fluidly. 

“How are you feeling?” Wendy mumbled just like every morning. “Not as sore, moving a little better. Shit, baby doll, I keep this up and I’ll be good as new in another week.” 

“Good as new, hardly; but feeling a lot better, probably.” She chuckled as she sat up. “No, no, baby doll, you stay in bed and get some rest.” 

“I can’t rest when you’re up, Mare; my mind goes in fifty different directions.” She huffed and pulled the covers back, her night shirt having been pushed right up under her breasts, exposing her lower half only covered by black bikini cut panties. 

Mary bit his lip as his eyes scanned her body for the millionth time that week. Fuck, everything about her was beautiful. He wanted nothing more than to bury his head between those thick thighs of hers, alas, he was limited. In all honesty, he wasn’t even sure what he could do for her, for himself. He was going on almost three weeks of _nothing _, which was unheard of for Mary Goore.__

__“Well,” Mary cleared his throat and turned his gaze to the floor. “I’m gonna make some coffee.”_ _

__“O-ok, I’ll be right in.” Wendy blushed at his obvious gaze. It intrigued her though she was unsure how she should proceed. He was far from well, but even she knew Mary Goore didn’t go a week without at least something…_ _

__Curious, Wendy stayed in her night shirt and wandered to the kitchen where Mary stood in front of the coffee pot, ready to flip the switch and begin brewing. She remained quiet as she gently pressed his shoulder, prompting Mary to turn around. Before he could say anything, she kissed him. Gentle and slow, Wendy snaked an arm around to support his neck as she deepened the kiss. Meanwhile, Mary’s free hand traveled down her back, to the round of her ass, giving it a gentle squeeze as a moan escaped his lips. He could feel himself giving way to her, wanting nothing more than to throw down right there on the kitchen floor. However, just as Wendy’s hand brushed at the band of his sweats, there was a knock at the door._ _

__“Fucks sake.” Mary groaned as he let go of Wendy to cup his throbbing erection._ _

__“Guess I should answer that, huh?” Wendy let out a deep breath. “If that wasn’t Jan I’d tell you to forget it.” Mary screwed his eyes shut and slipped past her._ _

__“Wh-why is Jan here? …Where are you going?” She furrowed her brows. “This thing ain’t goin’ down anytime soon. I need a few minutes.” He moved his hands away from the crotch of his sweats, revealing the still strained erection begging to be free from this grey fabric prison._ _

__Wendy bit her lip and looked him over, feeling a fire building in her lower half, a need she hadn’t felt quite so strongly since their only night together._ _

__“I think you might need some help…uh, _getting dressed _.” She flicked her eyes back to his face, a trace of lust in her expression. “Doc said two weeks.” Mary teased between breaths.___ _

____“But what does your body say?”_ _ _ _

____“That it fucking needs you.” He groaned and cupped his dick again, giving it a helpful squeeze to relieve some tension._ _ _ _

____“Go relax, I’ll be in to help you… _get dressed _, soon.” Wendy grinned softly before turning towards the door.___ _ _ _

______“Halle-fucking-lujah.” Mary whispered under his breath before making his way to their bedroom to sit on the crème colored chair, trying to keep his breaths calm at the throbbing sensation between his legs._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Jan, hey!” Wendy greeted her with a sleepy but cheerful face._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Morning!” Jan smiled and held up a food bag and drink carrier. “I brought breakfast and thought we could hang for a bit; sorry it’s so early.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Nonsense, come on in and make yourself comfortable.” Wendy encouraged. “Let me go get dressed and help Mary, and we’ll be right out.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Sure, yeah, I’ll go get some plates.” Jan walked with a little more pep in her step as Wendy disappeared down the hall._ _ _ _ _ _

______Wendy quietly turned the knob and pushed their door open. Mary shifted uncomfortably on the chair, the throbbing only having gotten worse, thinking about Wendy’s hands and mouth around him. He was a good boy though and waited for her._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Jesus fucking Christ!” Mary groaned. “That felt like an eternity.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Wendy stifled a giggle as she walked over and dropped to her knees in front of him. “Hips.” Was all she said, prompting him to tip his hips forward enough for Dee to shimmy the sweats down to his ankles, release his leaking cock from its confines._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Fuck, baby, please, just _touch me, anyway you want…I just, fuckin’ _need you. _”____ _ _ _ _ _

_________All of a sudden, Wendy was hungry for a lot more than just breakfast. Curious to push the boundaries of their new sexual relationship, she grabbed his dick, making sure to run her thumb over the sensitive head, collecting enough pre to coat his length._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________“Holy fuck,” He moaned as she began to work at a steady pace, stroking him closer to the edge. Just when he was almost there, Wendy slowed her movements causing him to whimper at the loss of intense friction. That was, until she took the tip into her mouth, swirling her tongue around before lightly sucking._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________Mary watched through half lidded eyes as she took him a little further into her mouth, but still left focus on just the head, driving him further over the edge with a simple, but effective movement. She looked so damn beautiful, taking care of him. He had only dreamed about a moment like this, never believing it to be possible. Not that this was _all _he dreamed about, but it was definitely something. Suddenly he was pulled from this pleasurably thought as the hot white heat began to tingle at his toes, working its way up.___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

___________“I…I’m not gonna last much longer like this. It’s…it’s been…too---nnnggghhh!” He just couldn’t finish his sentence as the heat centered at his core, and his cock pulsed inside her mouth as she continued her ministrations, swallowing all he could give._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

___________Though she had never done something quite like _this _, swallowing, specifically; between his obnoxious, but pleasurable moan and expression of pure bliss, she ran with the moment and finished in surprising ease.___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_____________Mary coughed and his torso tightened at the aching pain. He had almost forgotten his injuries and was lucky the aftershocks had taken the edge off; but that didn’t stop him from being quickly jolted back to reality as he calmed himself._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_____________“Fucking… _yes _,” Mary took some slow careful nasally breaths. “That was…”___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_______________“At least tolerable, I hope.” Wendy wiped her mouth as the blush tinted her cheeks again. “Tolerable?” Mary huffed. “Baby doll, that mouth is a damn gift…you’re a damn gift.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_______________Wendy giggled bashfully and stood up from her spot._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_______________“We better get dress and go hang out with Jan; she’s gonna think we ditched her or something.” She reminded him. “Fuck, right, yeah, sorry…I’m a little dazed right now.” Mary chuckled softly as he closed his eyes, relaxing and soaking up the post euphoric bliss as the pleasure leveled out the pain._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_______________Wendy chose to leave him be and got dressed first, recounting the moments that had just taken place. The fire still burned in her core, leaving her in almost as bad a state as Mary previously had been. Nothing could be done about it then though, not until later._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_______________“You owe me one tonight, sweetness; hands, mouth, toys, I don’t care, whatever you want. But I wanna hear that pretty mouth sing just for me.” Mary spoke as she turned around, entirely catching her off guard. She wasn’t used to talk like this, not when it was directed at her by Mary. However shocking it felt, the ache coursed over her whole body even more._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_______________“I wish it were now.” She whimpered and squeezed her thighs together. “Fuck, baby doll, me too.” He stood up and kicked his sweats off before rummaging through one of his drawers to grab a clean pair. “But I promise, as soon as Jan leaves, I’ll take care of you. You can bet your ass on that.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_______________“I’m holding you to it.” Wendy smirked and turned towards the door now that they were both dressed. “Damn right, you better.” Mary came up behind her and grabbed her ass before kissing the back of her head._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_______________“But I wanna say that I’m sorry it was…well…I hadn’t in a long time and—”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_______________“Mare, it’s OK.” She smiled softly as she turned to face him. “please, there’s no reason to apologize to me. You were perfect. Besides, sometimes it’s quick, sometimes it’s drawn out… or even somewhere in between…it doesn’t have to be this insane affair every single time.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_______________Mary let out a deep breath and nodded his head. Though it was rare that he made it quick, the times it crept up on him, he felt like shit and tried to apologize to partners, in his own Mary Goore way, but they mostly always seemed less than sympathetic…they also weren’t the one person he loved so deeply._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_______________“I just want you to feel good in all the right places.” Wendy gently pulled him from his thoughts._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_______________“I love you so fucking much, I swear.” Mary grinned as he pulled her close for a series of sweet and sloppy kisses._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_______________“I love you too, Goore.” Dee smiled again before pulling away to lead them both into the living room._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _


	28. Shatter Me

“Morning, Mare.” Jan smirked from the couch. 

“Heh, morning, Jan.” He nodded while Dee slipped off to the kitchen to wash her hands. “You good, Goore; seem a little flushed…I couldn’t begin to imagine _why _?”__

__“She would die if she knew you heard.” Mary huffed. “Please just—”_ _

__“Secret is safe with me.” Jan winked just before Wendy reentered with an incredibly tired but smiling face._ _

__For the first time in two weeks Wendy seemed normal save for the lack of sleep. At least for a few minutes that they sat in the living room together. Jan thought Mary was over exaggerating at first. However, it didn’t take long to see just why he had called her._ _

__“What do you need, Mare, I’ll get it.” Wendy stood up as soon as Mary rose from the couch._ _

__“Relax, baby doll, just heatin’ up my drink is all.”_ _

__“Nonsense, I’ll do it.” She smiled eagerly behind her tired eyes._ _

__Mary knew there was no fighting her increasingly helpful nature and ultimately handed the paper cup her way. Dee felt instant gratification keeping Mary from moving too much, and also keeping him happy, or at least in her mind she was. It wasn’t that Mary didn’t appreciate her help, but he wasn’t made of glass. Sure, maybe a little broken, but not entirely out of commission as she treated him._ _

__Jan raised a brow in Mary’s direction as Dee disappeared to the kitchen on her mission._ _

__“Only the beginning.” Mary huffed and carefully crossed his arms before sitting back. “Every time I stand up she’ll ask if I need anything, and if it’s nothing she can do, she’ll absentmindedly follow me wherever I go. I fucking love her; and I appreciate every damn thing she does, but she’s running herself into the ground, J.”_ _

__“We need to get her out of here for a night.”_ _

__“I agree; and you know, She hasn’t touched a guitar in, I don’t know, about two weeks and that ain’t like her.” Mary bit the inside of his cheek. “ _Thee _show is coming up next weekend and she hasn’t said the first word about it…we’ve all worked too fuckin’ hard to lose this spot just cause I’m a little banged up.”___ _

____“Maybe I should call a band practice tonight.” Jan shrugged quietly as Dee came into sight, the tired but cheerful expression still on her face as she walked Mary’s drink over._ _ _ _

____“Thank you, sweetness.” Mary smiled and pecked her on the lips. “Need anything else?”_ _ _ _

____“Nope, I’m just fine; sit back and chill for a while, alright?”_ _ _ _

____Chill…she didn’t know much know the meaning of that word anymore._ _ _ _

____“So…” Jan spoke after a lengthy silence. “you excited about the show?”_ _ _ _

____Her question was obviously directed towards Wendy, but fell on an absent minded girl staring off into space. Jan looked over to Mary who shrugged and turned his sights back to Dee, still barely holding her head up as she became lost in her own thoughts while gazing at a picture on the wall._ _ _ _

____“Baby doll…you OK?” Mary spoke up._ _ _ _

____Mary obnoxiously slapped his good hand against the armrest of his chair, and Dee to jolt out of her own mind._ _ _ _

____“Wha-What did I miss?” She looked over with big eyes. “Do you need something, Mare…I’m sorry—I guess I was just daydreaming.”_ _ _ _

____Mary’s heart broke as he saw the frantic look in her eyes, like a deer caught in headlights. She was literally existing for his sake and it wasn’t fair. Sure, he needed her help, and he loved her help, but this…this was too much for the both of them. Wendy needed to be Wendy, she needed to get back to what she loves, and Mary was determined to make that happen._ _ _ _

____Wendy just smiled wearily between the two of them, realizing she had been caught in her thoughts. They weren’t even thoughts, really, just blank space to sooth her from her barely functioning self._ _ _ _

____“So, Dee, I’ve been thinking and maybe we should call band practice tonight.” Jan finally spoke. “It has been more than two weeks and I think we need to get a few practices in before next weekend.”_ _ _ _

____“Funny you should mention that, because I’ve been meaning to talk to you guys about this.” Wendy took a deep breath with a slow exhale. “With all that has happened this month, I just…I know it’s important, I do, but I really think we should forgo this show.”_ _ _ _

____“No way.” Mary shook his head._ _ _ _

____“Mare, you can’t play right now and with your injuries, you can’t back me up vocally…it’s just not good timing is all. There will be other shows, other opportunities.” Wendy attempted to reason while Jan sat dumbfounded._ _ _ _

____“Dee this is the one big shot we’ve got!” Mary stood up with his face contorted in disbelief. “We’ve worked so fuckin’ hard these last two years, how could you just throw that away?”_ _ _ _

____His voice quickly faltered, and face fell as he lowered his tone, realizing how aggressively he probably came off._ _ _ _

____“I want this more than I’ve ever wanted anything, beside you, in my whole fuckin’ life. I know I can’t contribute right now, but you bet your ass that I’ll be doin’ what I can when the time comes.” Mary spoke calmly as he walked over and lowered to his knees in front of Wendy, grabbing one of her hands in the process._ _ _ _

____“Dee, please do this…for me, for our band, for yourself; we all deserve this shot.”_ _ _ _

____Wendy looked wearily as the tears began to trickle down her pinkening cheeks. The emotions she had bottled up began to swirl around in her body like a whirlpool. Mix that with little sleep, and she was a sobbing mess. She hated this. She hated showing her emotions, her exhaustion. She had been doing so good for Mary, keeping him safe…keeping him alive._ _ _ _

____“I’m just _so _tired, Mare.”___ _ _ _

______“I know, baby, I know…just do this one thing and I promise you can rest for a little while.” Mare spoke softly as he pulled her towards his good shoulder, allowing Dee to sob against him._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Shhh…s’ok, baby doll.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Sure, Mary had been through some trauma in the last two weeks, but not quite the way Wendy had. Her day job didn’t warrant her a free pass from anxiety and emotional exhaustion, and she was doing too damn much for him, but nothing for herself._ _ _ _ _ _

______“Listen to me,” Mary’s voice sounded quiet but sure. “you’re exhausted right now, but if you let this pass by you’ll regret it later. You can do it; you can do anything you want.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“I’m scared...” Wendy took a deep breath and rubbed her eyes. “What if I _can’t _do this, what if _we _can’t do this one without you, Mare?”_____ _ _ _ _ _

__________“You can…I promise you can, baby.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________“You don’t understand, Mare, I just…I can’t…”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________Jan sighed quietly at the sight before her. Wendy looked just short of the walking dead, her eyes were filled with confusion and fear, and there was no fucking way they could have a band practice in her current state. Jan almost felt a tinge of responsibility, remembering what she had told Dee back at the hospital; that she needed to be strong for Mary, a shoulder to lean on because _he _would be the one who felt distraught and unwell. But Dee had pushed herself so far to keep that from happening, she in turn became the unwell one, bordering on obsession and compulsive behavior just to keep him well.___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________Mary was fine though, getting better each day. Soon he really wouldn’t need her to do everything for him and he longed for that day. Not because he didn’t want her to care, but because he needed some semblance of normalcy back. He needed Wendy to be Wendy again. He needed his girl to be his girl. They honestly didn’t know what that felt like outside of a circle of trauma. Trauma is what brought them back together, or at least solidified the relationship they both wished to pursue._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________“I have to confirm with the owner this Friday.” Jan finally spoke. “Take some time to think about it, maybe with some much needed rest you’ll reconsider…just take some time to breathe, alright?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________Mary wanted to be encouraging, but he couldn’t help to feel a little selfish in that moment. He swore in his own mind that it would be a no brainer for him in a situation like this. That as long as he had Wendy’s full support, he would do it if the shoe were on the other foot. But seeing her in such brokenness and being expected to bounce back in just two weeks as if it never happened, was it really fair? He wanted to be logical, he did…but Mary felt like so much had been taken from him, and damnit he wanted something back! He wanted to see her ass on stage doing what they both love to do._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________“Why don’t you go take a nice long bubble bath, hm; if you want, I’ll sit here with Mare while you relax.” Jan offered as Mary looked to see her raising her eyebrows to prompt his support._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________“Uh, yeah, baby doll…why don’t you do that?” He turned his gaze back to her tear soaked face. “Jan can put up with my ass while you soak for a little while.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________“Sure…” Wendy let out a deep sigh and looked between the two of them for a moment._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________In all honestly, she really could’ve used a good soak after this small emotional release. But she could see the uneasy look behind their pathetic attempt of calm encouraging expressions. Deep inside it made her angry. It made her feel fucking crazy, like she was the only one not in on some big secret, and she was…_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________Dee looked like a walking zombie. Pale as a ghost, her eyes tired with the skin just below practically translucent, marked in shades of purple and red. Running on just caffeine and little food, it looked like she’d also lost a little weight from their time apart to the current. So her once sweet healthy cheeks that seemed to smile so often before, were now slender and naturally contoured. Her whole frame seemed less generous with her pants, denim or sweats, constantly having to be pulled up throughout the day._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________Mary would have thought that was cool and metal as fuck for Dee to look this way for a show with the help of makeup, but not in real life, and not because she had taken on the role of his… _caretaker _.___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________Still feeling completely left out and empty, Wendy turned on her heels and walked down the hall. The floor had never felt so cold as her feet dragged on until she reached their bedroom door. It was strange walking inside, realizing not long before that room had been surrounded in intimacy and pleasure, but now seemed bleak and unwelcoming._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________Dee quietly sobbed as she moved towards the bathroom and turned on the hot and cold knobs just perfectly to start filling the tub. After dropping a lavender bath bomb in the middle, something just beckoned her to their door again, something deep inside. Maybe it was insecurity, paranoia…she wasn’t sure. However, quiet as a mouse, she turned the knob at opened the door just a couple of inches to listen._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_______________”I don’t fuckin’ know, Jan; she’s losing it with the overprotectiveness and panic every hour of the day. I’m smokin’ two fuckin’ packs now just to escape. And now this whole thing with not wanting to play the show we’ve all been counting on…I just don’t know.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_______________“She’s been through a lot, Mare.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_______________“Yeah, well, so have I; imagine being me, Jan. Imagine feeling the way I feel being treated like a kid twenty-four fuckin’ seven…and then having the one thing you’ve been counting on stripped away after all the shit that has happened.” Mary barked back and winced as he crossed his arm over his chest. ____ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________________Wendy could feel the hot tears well up in her eyes as she covered her mouth and let out another silent sob. She couldn’t take it, knowing she was just another burden for someone to bare after she had tried so hard. Unable to contain her emotions, Dee carefully closed the door and rushed to the bathroom to shove her face in a towel. She bawled until her lungs gave out and she was heaving into cotton and silence._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________________“Fuck, man, I…you know I didn’t mean that.” Mary sighed in frustration. “I’m just so fucking exhausted and irritated by this fucking thing on my arm. “I’m fucking lucky to have Dee taking care of me like she does. She’s a fuckin’ saint to put up with my ass and still have a smile on her face, no matter how tired. I just want her to slow down, take a breath and enjoy something she loves without feeling bad about it…you know?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________________Mary flopped back on the couch feeling like the biggest asshole in the world, all the while he had unintentionally hurt the one person he loved… ____ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________Meanwhile in the bathroom the water was just short of running over when she gathered herself and twisted the knobs, stopping the warm gush of the purple sea that had filled her tub._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________The ache in her chest never subsided as she got undressed and dipped her body in the scalding hot water. She welcomed the stinging on her skin. Nothing could compare to the emotional pain running laps in her mind, but at least this was a pain she could see in the redness covering her arms and legs._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________How did this happen? How did she become so protective she was too protective? How did she become so afraid? How did she become so annoying and worthless in Mary’s eyes?_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________Dunking her head under water, Wendy contemplated their life together for the last few weeks. So many ups and downs, so many hurt filled words and silence. There was too much to comprehend and her head became fuzzy as a breath was long overdue. Her lungs burned when she came to the surface and gasped. The fear of drowning did nothing for her. She could’ve walked outside and played in traffic and would have gladly taken her chances. Wendy felt stripped of care and disrespected all in the same. She thought she was doing a good job even if it was taking a toll on her body. Obviously all Mary did was put on a show day after day as she ran herself ragged, Dee thought._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________Wendy felt used, she felt embarrassed and pathetic to be so caring towards the one person she loved, but also the one person who seemed to be sick of her. Part of her wished she never would have slept with him the first time, that everything would have remained just so. Maybe she wouldn’t have been so caring if feelings weren’t involved. In that moment, she swore to herself if she could take it all back, she would. But deep down Wendy knew that was a lie. Even if he broke her heart, which he seemed to be accomplishing so well, she couldn’t deny the goodness in the years they had together before all of this._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________________No matter what, when she walked out of that bathroom, she wasn’t going to let him see her cry. That was the one promise she made as Wendy jumped ship on communication yet again…_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry! Can't have the comfort without the hurt...more to come soon, I promise. 
> 
> Also for some reason it didn't italicize the conversation between Mary and Jan, just know it should have been.


	29. Burden

After her bath, Wendy splashed her face a few times to draw away the puffiness from her eyes before forcing herself to apply some makeup to look alive. 

She tried so damn hard to smile after she applied the finishing touch of matte lipstick, but the tears welled up in her eyes. 

After her bath, Wendy splashed her face a few times to draw away the puffiness from her eyes before forcing herself to apply some makeup to look alive. 

She tried so damn hard to smile after she applied the finishing touch of matte lipstick, but the tears welled up in her eyes. 

“Fuck…” Wendy huffed and shook her head. “get your life together, Dee, fucking get it together, woman.” 

A few deep breaths and she finished scrunching her hair to its true damp curly state, then applied some perfume before walking back into the bedroom. 

“Hey, where are you goin’ baby doll?” Mary’s voice startled her as she clutched her towel for dear life. 

A small mischievously smile graced his lips as he lay on his side looking at her. 

“Ah, just, um, out for a little while. I need to grab a few odds and ends.” Wendy mumbled as she disappeared into the closet. 

“Oh, well, Jan just left, so…I was thinkin’ maybe we could finish what we started.” Mary waggled his brows as his eyes stay glued to the closet opening, hoping for a glimpse of her naked body. 

He wasn’t mad anymore; honestly he wasn’t really all that mad anyway, just frustrated in the heat of the moment. However, just as he had gotten over this stupid outburst, Wendy was still simmering on what she believed to be true, and wasn’t ready to talk about it. 

“Maybe later, Mare; I just want to get this trip over with before the day is out.” 

“Alright well I’ll come with you. Then, when we get back, we can resume…” 

Wendy took a deep breath and slowly exhaled to keep from speaking too quickly as she slipped her clothes. 

Why did he want to be around her so badly all of a sudden? 

“You stay and rest, Mare.” Wendy stepped out of the closet fully dressed. “It would be good for you to have some time to yourself; I can’t stay home forever and this gives you a chance to do things on your own even for an hour.” 

Except, it wasn’t just an hour. Wendy didn’t plan to disappear, but once she sat in her car she felt a burst of energy. It was nice being on her own, being able to do whatever she wanted without having to worry about someone. Alas, she still worried about Mary and how he was getting along on his own. Dee scolded herself every time the thought came up from the drive-thru at the coffee shop to the mostly empty highway along a beautiful stretch of forest. Mary never really left her mind. 

That first hour passed so quickly, then the next, and the next. Soon Dee had been gone for three hours and Mary began to worry at least a little. He hadn’t been without her since his accident and never thought of what it would be like to be alone. Dee was never more than a room away…now she was somewhere even Mary didn’t know. His thoughts began to wander as he reached for his cellphone on the coffee table. The damn thing was entirely too new and he could barely navigate it, but he managed a simple text at least, checking on Wendy. 

> Hey baby doll just wanted to see how its goin… 

__Mary watched the screen curiously, waiting for three bubbles to pop up, but the chance becoming slimmer with each moment. Why wasn’t she answering? Was she really that busy? They didn’t need that many groceries, not enough to be gone for almost four hours._ _

__The day quickly faded as Mary paced the floor holding his cellphone, watching the screen like a madman._ _

___> Dee plz call me when you get this. Worried. _ _ _

___> Been gone a while baby doll please call. Need to know you’re ok. _ _ _

___> Fucking worried._ _ _

___> I hope you’re ok. I love you Dee so much. Plz call me. ____ _

____His heart raced and his stomach ached every time his call was forwarded. What if something happened to Wendy? What if she fell asleep at the wheel? What if she was in an accident? …what if she left, really left, because Mary was too much to take care of? What if she had met her limit?_ _ _ _

____Mary had managed to call all of their bandmates, everyone but Jan. She was a last resort he dreaded to reach for. He even called Archie’s and Davis’ to no avail._ _ _ _

____“Mare, what’s up; Dee change her mind?”_ _ _ _

____“She’s gone, Jan.” Mary swallowed hard._ _ _ _

____“What do you mean, gone?”_ _ _ _

____“She left around noon and never came back. I’ve called a million times, left just as many texts…no response, not even once.”_ _ _ _

____“Maybe she got a wild hair and decided to take a little day trip, Mare; Dee has been under a lot of stress lately.”_ _ _ _

____“Or maybe she fucking left my ass.” Mary took a deep breath and looked around the living room which seemed to become smaller by the minute._ _ _ _

____“Why would she do that, Mare?”_ _ _ _

____“Maybe she heard what I said earlier. I wouldn’t blame her if she did leave…I was an asshole in the biggest way, Jan. I didn’t fuckin mean it, not a word. It was just heat of the moment type shit.”_ _ _ _

____“You really think she heard you?” Jan bit the side of her cheek._ _ _ _

____“I don’t know, Jan. I just know my girlfriend is fuckin’ missing and hasn’t answered her phone all day. It’s not lookin good and I don’t have another explanation other than she fuckin’ heard me and ditched.”_ _ _ _

____“Maybe she’s just blowing off some steam. Put yourself in her shoes, Mare; you’d probably leave for a little while too, just to be alone. She’ll come back, just give her some time. If I hear from her I promise I’ll let you know.”_ _ _ _

____Jan would have been lying if she said she wasn’t worried. Wendy was always one to give a quick response no matter what. She never left a phone call unanswered or a text unread, especially from Mary. She was either really fucking upset…or something happened._ _ _ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor Mary! Poor Wendy! Not for too long though, I promise. Wendy just can't shake this feeling yet. She needs a little time is all.


	30. Call Me

While Mary was panicked and wearing a sure path across the floor in their living room, Wendy was just across town…at the mall. It was easy to lose since of time when you weren’t a watch wearer and your phone was buried deep in the bottom of your purse. 

That’s right, after Dee had her coffee and took a little drive, she ended up at the mall for some retail therapy. She didn’t feel as angry anymore, really she didn’t feel angry at all. Dee felt hurt more than anything. As hurt as she left, she owed it to herself and to Mary to talk about it. No matter what they chose to do, at least she could say she communicated, even if it took her hours to come around. That was an improvement, right? 

Wendy smiled to herself as she walked around one of their favorite stores. It wasn’t like all the others in the mall, not some knock off mass produced shit kids could get at a couple of popular stores when their parents pissed them off and they felt a little edgy. No, this place, Death’s Emporium, was as unique as the oddities shop she and Jan had visited. Della, the owner outsourced from multiple independent artists and only kept ten to twenty pieces of each item in stock, and once it was gone, it was gone forever. 

Knowing this, when Wendy rounded the corner, her heart fluttered, and lips turned upward into an even bigger smile. Each Friday Della would release a new set based around a theme and this Friday just so happened to be Nosferatu. It was always a shirt, piece of art, enamel pin and sometimes a kitchenware, like a coffee mug. This week was no different, except instead of kitchenware, a small coffin necklace with a tiny resin Nosferatu was on display. 

“The artist made five and this was the only one I received.” Della walked over, a soft smile on her face, happy to see a regular in the store for the first time all day. 

“Just five?” Wendy held the small necklace up to give it a good look. It was perfect for Mary and she knew it, especially being so one of a kind. 

“Just five.” Della nodded. “I asked for two, but that’s all they sent me.” 

Wendy had been so busy with all that had happened that she didn’t have a chance prior to this to get Mary a gift for Halloween. This would be the perfect gift, she just knew it. 

“I’ll take it.” She grinned before dropping it in Della’s hands. 

“Want it wrapped?” 

“Please, but I think I’ll also take the shirt, pin and comic art too if you could wrap those as well.” 

“Hm, well, someone will be quite lucky to receive these gifts.” Della spoke sweetly as Wendy followed her to the front. 

Mary would be lucky, but Wendy felt lucky too, that she had someone to appreciate all of this whether they were together or not. 

The necklace in it’s own small box, wrapped in black paper and a lace bow, Wendy fished through her purse while Della placed everything else in a large apparel box and wrapped it in the same black paper. 

“Let me just get you checked out.” Della placed the boxes in a large black bag and took Dee’s card. 

“Oh shit.” Wendy looked up at the clock on the wall reading just past 8:30 PM. “Is that clock right?” 

“It is, sweet girl, the mall closes in half an hour.” Della handed her card back. “I guess I lost track of time, haven’t looked at my phone.” 

Wendy could feel the panic wash over as she bid farewell and fished through her purse for her phone. 

80 missed calls  
50 text messages  
15 voicemails

‘Hey, baby doll, just checkin’ on you. Thought you would be back by now…well, give me a call when you get this.’ 

‘Baby doll, I’m getting a little worried. You’ve been gone for a few hours now, and I can’t get a hold of you. I just want to know that you’re safe. Please call me. I love you.’ 

‘It’s me again…please, just call me, OK? I love you.’ 

‘Dee if I did or said something to upset you, I’m sorry. I just want to know you’re ok.’ 

‘Wendy, seriously, please just call me. Tell me you’re OK, I just want to know that you’re safe. If you’re mad at me, fine, but don’t just up and disappear without a word and leave me hanging like this. It has been seven fucking hours and I’m fucking scared something has happened to you.’

Mary’s voice began to crack more and more with each voicemail as Wendy drove across town trying to keep her cool. Of course she wanted to call him back instantly and tell him she was OK, but she knew that call would be filled with more conversation than she was willing to have over a phone call. There were too many thoughts and feelings involved in the moment, and this conversation was worth more than a possible screaming match over a machine while driving. 

Wendy didn’t even have time to think and even if she did, she couldn’t. Instead she pulled into her parking spot as usual and gathered all of her bags from the day before walking towards their door. 

“I don’t fucking know, Jan! I told you before, I called so much I filled up her voicemail. I can’t do anything else except file a report and she hasn’t been missing long enough for that.” Mary sniffled as he placed the floor just inside the living room. 

Tears welled up in Wendy’s eyes hearing just how distraught he sounded as she fumbled for her keys before successfully unlocking and pushing the door open. Mary quickly turned around, tears streaming down his flushed cheeks as their eyes met for the first time in what felt like an eternity. 

“Never mind, she just walked in. I’ll talk to you later.” 

Jan wanted to say more, but Mary quickly ended the call as he scanned Dee and the various bags hanging off her arms. 

“Good, you’re home.” Mary tossed his phone on the couch. 

“Mary I’m so sorry, my phone was on silent and I lost track of time…” 

“Just save it for tomorrow. I’m exhausted and I need sleep.” Mary rubbed his eyes on his shirt and turned towards the hall. 

“Please, I’m sorry…can we just talk?” Wendy whispered softly enough to not be within earshot as Mary walked to his old room. They hadn’t slept without each other after all this time and now both hurt and angry, Mary chose to sleep alone. 

Wendy dropped all of her bags on the ground as he closed the door behind him. Her heart sank so deeply she was surprised to not see it on the floor. 

She deserved this, she deserved it every bit. How dare she be so cruel to not think of Mary more and check her phone. But how dare he say such hurtful things to begin with. 

Defeated and lost Wendy locked the front door, turned off the lights and dragged herself to their bedroom. It felt so massive, so empty without Mary lying in bed wearing a big grin as he watched some smutty tv show or cheesy movie before bed. Things couldn’t go on this way, not with them both crying and hurt, wishing the other would just say something anything to make it all better. It felt all too familiar and Dee didn’t like it.

Deep down she knew it wasn’t Mary’s place this time to be the one, even if he said some things that hurt her, Wendy scared him more than he had ever been scared his whole life. It was up to her to make that up to him, to assure him. He had been strong and as independent as possible since they came home, and he never once talked about the accident…but it was finally catching up to him. The emotional toll was there, and he had never felt more alone in trying to deal with it. 

Wendy took her time in the shower, washing away some of the negativity before rummaging through their closet to find his favorite ‘Venom’ shirt, one he’d had long enough that the fabric wore thin. She smiled slightly and wiped her eyes as she admired the way it clang to her body, hitting just below her upper thigh, hiding the bareness underneath. 

“Fuck it.” She huffed and walked towards the door. Her heart raced again as she slipped across the hall and quietly turned the knob of his door. Sure it was rude to not announce herself, but Mary would probably just shut her out if she tried. 

There in the darkness of his room, Mary lay on his back underneath the green comforter, pulled up to his bare belly. His eyes fixed to the ceiling, Dee could see tears slowly trickling down the side of his face and disappearing beyond his neck. 

“You don’t have to speak if you don’t want to, but I have something to say.” Wendy spoke calmly as she leaned against the doorframe nervously wringing her hands together. 

“I heard what you said earlier about me being too overbearing and causing you more grief, probably more than I’m worth. It hurt, it hurt a lot to know that the one person I love more than anyone else in the whole world thought so little of me after I devoted my existence to keeping them safe and well.” 

“So I left for a little while to give us both some space, to give you a chance to relax away from me since I’ve become too much…but I never intended to scare you, to make you think that I was in danger. I just didn’t check my phone and then when I did for the first time all day I found all of your messages and voicemails—I’m just, I’m really sorry, Mary.” 

Mary swallowed hard as he turned his gaze to her. No matter how emotional he felt, his heart fluttered seeing Dee wearing nothing but his shirt. She looked beautiful to him, a perfect image…one he had been afraid he’d never see again.


	31. Brain and Heart

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A day early, but...Happy Valentine's Day! I think we along with Mary and Wendy deserve this little chapter. But I also want to apologize for my lack of posting lately. Mary and Wendy still have a lot of their story left to tell and I'm working on their direction to make those chapters happen! Thank you for reading and leaving all the lovely comments! Every single one is much appreciated!

“I really want to be close to you right now, can I?” Dee moved from the frame and stepped closer. 

Mary nodded, his eyes still glued to her presence as she rolled the tattered shirt off her body, leaving it completely bare. 

He had never felt this way before, not even when he woke for the first time in the hospital. The vulnerability coursing through his whole body made Mary want to hide every inch of his still bruised self from her, as if he could shield his existence from the fear he’d been feeling all day. 

Mary had never delt with the accident or how he’d felt being away from Wendy that week before. He had been mad at the whole world those days that slowly ticked by until she reached out to him. Then the accident happened and there was no time to really reconnect the way he wanted with her. Nothing had truly been faced on his end, not with the trauma, at least. Then to have Wendy disappear all day with no word, it drummed up everything he should’ve felt before. Except this time he faced it completely alone. 

“I thought you…left me.” Mary sniffled, another tear slipping against his ear and down his neck as Wendy pulled the covers back to reveal his naked body. 

“I think we have gotten well past that, Mare.” Wendy moved carefully to straddle his hips; his half hard cock soon pressed against her. “No matter what we say, no matter what we do…it will always come back to this; us, me and you.” 

“I would go to hell and back, move heaven and earth if possible, but I will _never _leave you, Mary.”__

____

____

____

__Tears flowed freely, streaking his cheeks as Mary squeezed her hip. He had never depended on someone this way before, not just to help him, but to keep him emotionally well._ _

____

____

____

__“I love you, Mary; and I am going to continue taking care of you even when it pisses you off, because that’s just what I do. I know you didn’t mean what you said, but I needed a little time to convince myself. Now I just need you, I need to be closer to you.”_ _

____

____

____

__“Please…be closer to me. I need you not just right now, but always.” Mary’s lips quivered; the words barely audible as Wendy stroked him to fullness._ _

____

____

____

__The tears prickled in Wendy’s eyes as she lifted her hips and slowly slipped down on him, letting Mary fill her perfectly. They both gasped at this instant connection, something that had been missing all this time._ _

____

____

____

__“Tell me if I hurt you, OK?” Wendy sniffled as she looked his vulnerable expression over until he nodded._ _

____

____

____

__Taking another squeeze to her hip as encouragement, Wendy began to carefully bounce up and down, her body stroking him in the best way. Mary’s shuttered at the heat building between his thighs, needy pleasure pulsing with each movement. He watched her beautiful face, tears glistening on her skin, and in that moment he had never been so in love. In that moment Mary gave himself to Wendy completely, losing himself inside the essence of her._ _

____

____

____

__“I love you.” Mary whispered softly to keep from moaning._ _

____

____

____

__He swore to himself long ago that he wouldn’t be that cheesy guy to profess his love during sex, but there he was looking into those beautiful blue eyes as the words came tumbling out with meaning._ _

____

____

____

__“I love you too, Mary.”_ _

____

____

____

__Just trying to keep her emotionally messy self together, Wendy closed her eyes and continued her ministrations with a deep intensity, until Mary was a writhing mess of pleasure beneath her._ _

____

____

____

__“Fuck, I’m…I’m not going to, uh…I—nnhhggg!” Mary grunted from deep in his chest and the hot white heat attacked his core with the best pleasure as Wendy rode him to finish._ _

____

____

____

__As much as he wished to enjoy this immense pleasure, the pain in his chest became all too much and a tinge of panic began to spread through his body._ _

____

____

____

__“What do you need, Mare?” Wendy spoke calmly as she slipped off his hips to sit beside him._ _

____

____

____

__“Pillow.” Mary clinched his jaw and let out a nasally breath as he sat up._ _

____

____

____

__Wendy quickly grabbed a pillow and placed it against him. All went silent for a moment as Mary wrapped his arms around the pillow and buried his face in the fabric to heave a few breaths until the pain subsided._ _

____

____

____

__“Wh-where are you going?” Fear flashed in Mary’s eyes as he looked up from the pillow having felt the bed shift._ _

____

____

____

__“I’ll be right back, I promise; just going to clean up and to get you something for the pain.” Wendy bit the inside her lip as she squeezed her thighs together to keep from making a mess._ _

____

____

____

__“I’m OK.” Mary shook his head. “I promise.”_ _

____

____

____

__Wendy wasn’t buying it, she ultimately agreed before slipping away to the bathroom one door down. She couldn’t shake the fearful look from her mind as she walked back out of the room. She needed to be close to him and stay that way just as long as she could. Sex wasn’t enough, Wendy needed more._ _

____

____

____

__“Hey Mare, you wanna take a bubble bath with me and relax for a little while?” Wendy walked back into the bedroom where Mary sat up, the pillow still to his chest as his breaths began to even out._ _

____

____

____

__“Now that is some pain relief I can get behind.” Mary flashed that familiar crooked grin she missed so much._ _

____

____

____

__Though she mentioned the idea, Mary took over and slipped out of bed now unashamed of his body and all it had been through. He smiled softly and grabbed Wendy’s hand before pulling her through the hall into the bathroom attached to their room._ _

____

____

____

__“Hey, I thought I was the one who offered the bath, let me, hm?” Wendy smirked as Mary adjusted the knobs of the tub bringing it to a perfectly warm temperature they could both stand._ _

____

____

____

__“Yeah, yeah, baby doll, whatever you say.” Mary pecked her cheek and watched Wendy drop a blue bath bomb into the tub._ _

____

____

____

__A few moments later the water was just high enough to hit at the waist, and Wendy helped Mary in. He sighed in deepest relief as he leaned back against the lip of the tub, his arms hanging off either side._ _

____

____

____

__“Your turn, sweetness; get your ass in here so I can hold you.” The softness in his eyes, the longing to be near couldn’t be wiped from Mary’s face. He fucking needed Wendy, he needed to touch her to make sure she wouldn’t disappear. But he couldn’t exactly come out and say that, literally; Mary couldn’t get the words out right now if he wanted._ _

____

____

____

__Wendy made gentle movements until she was seated between his legs, her back barely touching his chest for fear of further damage._ _

____

____

____

__“Am I hurting you?”_ _

____

____

____

__“Not even a little.” Mary hummed and lolled his head again, soaking up the warmth from the water and her beautiful body._ _

____

____

____

__They basked in this little moment of silence as Mary’s good arm casually found its way to the top of her thigh, inching closer and closer to the top of her hip._ _

____

____

____

__“You know, baby doll, we still have some unfished business to tend to if I recall right.”_ _

____

____

____

__His breath fell across the back of her neck inducing a shiver down her spine. Wendy’s body reacted before she had a chance to process. The pounding in her heart, the ache between her thighs. Her mind felt as if it was full of fog, a lust filled fog._ _

____

____

____

__“Oh?” Was all she replied._ _

____

____

____

__“Mmhmm,” Mary’s lips brushed against her skin just slightly, teasing with sensitivity. “Now, why don’t you turn around and let me take care of you?”_ _

____

____

____

__“I don’t want you to exert yourself…”_ _

____

____

____

__“Just turn your ass around and spread those perfect thighs for me, alright; I fuckin’ need this…I fuckin’ need you.”_ _

____

____

____

__The bubbles had mostly all faded, and the water was left a translucent blue as Wendy turned her body around, spreading her thighs at Mary’s request before sitting down to face him._ _

____

____

____

__“Holy fuck, you are so beautiful, I…I just—” Mary couldn’t gather his words as his hand dipped below the water again, caressing the inner most part of her thighs, teasing his way closer to her core._ _

____

____

____

__He was careful and aware as he slowed his breathing to a comfortable rhythm before slipping two fingers inside her, while his thumb worked her clit._ _

____

____

____

__“Fuck me…” Wendy groaned and gripped the sides of the tub as her eyes twisted shut._ _

____

____

____

__“I already did that, baby doll; well, really you did that.” Mary chuckled softly while continuing his ministrations._ _

____

____

____

__Wendy quickly lost herself in his touch, her hips gently rocking back and forth, chasing his movement to double the sensation. She had needed this in the worst way, more than she could’ve realized._ _

____

____

____

__“That’s it, baby, let me hear you sing; cum on my fingers.” Mary hissed into a moan. “Fuck I wish I could taste you right now, so damn sweet. Could eat you for hours until till you’re tired of my mouth.”_ _

____

____

____

__Mary could feel her body tense and draw closer to the edge as he sped his movements in fervor._ _

____

____

____

__The hot white heat she had missed so fondly ripped through her core with a force she had never experienced as she cried out Mary’s name laced in need._ _

____

____

____

__“So beautiful.” Mary spoke in a hushed tone as she whimpered and twitched until he halted his movements. “I love you so much, Dee…”_ _

____

____

____

__Tears prickled in her eyes as she opened them for the first time since he touched her. Between being slightly embarrassed and emotionally messy, Wendy couldn’t help herself as she looked into his eyes._ _

____

____

____

__“I love you too, Mare.” Wendy’s voice cracked and the tears quickly streaked her face as she reached out to caress his cheek._ _

____

____

____

__“Did I hurt you or something?” Mary chewed the inside of his lip nervously._ _

____

____

____

__“No.” Wendy sniffled. “This is the second time you’ve ever touched me like this; and after all we’ve been through, it was very emotional…in a good way, I promise.”_ _

____

____

____

__“The second time maybe, but sure as hell not the last. I’m going for a record of at least a million when it’s all said and done, so…” Mary winked and leaned forward to pepper her face with kisses._ _

____

____

____

__Even through the tears, Wendy couldn’t help the giggles that escaped her lips._ _

____

____

____

__“Now that I see a smile, let’s wash up and go cuddle in _our _bed.” Mary suggested and grabbed two wash cloths from the basket by the tub. Even injured he managed to care for Wendy in the simplest ways of washing her back and shoulders, enjoying the beautiful view she provided. He couldn’t turn his eyes away if he tried.____

_______ _ _ _

_____ _

_______ _ _ _

____

_______ _ _ _

_____ _

_______ _ _ _

____Oh yes, he had given himself to her, no doubt. Wendy was it for Mary and he had never felt more secure in believing so, especially after spending hours in fear not knowing where she was or what she was doing._ _ _ _

_______ _ _ _

_____ _

_______ _ _ _

____

_______ _ _ _

_____ _

_______ _ _ _


	32. Extra Cheese, Please!

“Did you eat dinner, Mare?” Wendy looked over from drying off as her stomach grumbled. 

“No, but I could definitely eat somethin’.” 

Wendy wrapped a towel securely around her body and grinned. Without a word she disappeared to the living room in search of a phone. 

“Alright, what kind of pizza do you want?” 

Dee could see the slight glimmer in his eyes at the mention of pizza. It was, after all, one of Mary’s favorite foods, especially from Marino’s. 

“I don’t care, babe, as long you order the garlic knots.” Mary bit his lip to concentrate on wrapping a towel around his waist, only to fail miserably. “Ah, fuck it!” 

Mary felt the best he had in a while, as he dropped the towel in the hamper and embraced his true form. “Ya know, maybe some hot fries would be good, but no fuckin’ blue cheese. That shit is nasty.” Mary twisted his lips. “And some cheese sticks, but don’t let ‘em stiff ya on the sauce…oh! Get some cannoli’s; no, no, instead get some chocolate cake.” 

Wendy chuckled at the hungry beast that apparently resided in Mary’s body for the moment. This was the most enthusiastic Mary had been since coming home, and Dee was living for it, even if he was being obnoxious and excessive. 

“Uh, what about the pizza, Mare?” Wendy arched her brow in amusement. 

“Oh, heh, pizza, right…” Mary rubbed the back of his neck, embarrassed that he’d gotten so carried away. “anything you want, sweetness, just no pineapples or mushrooms.” 

“You have my word; now go get comfortable in bed, alright?” 

Mary’s lips turned upward in a small grin as he sauntered over for a quick peck, and soon he disappeared into their room. That bed had never looked so perfect to him, the sheets never so soft and inviting. There he soon lay, perfectly comfortable and with a surprisingly small amount of adjustment or pillows. 

Having a few moments while she placed the order, Mary took it upon himself to surf through the never ending list of movies on the tv. He wanted this dinner to be like old times, well, as close as they could get to old times, save for the lack of relationship before. A dinner and movie in bed seemed like the best way to end such a horrible day, and he was determined to pick the best movie for the moment. 

Meanwhile after placing their order, Wendy quietly crept to their door to peek inside. There Mary sat, his body uncovered from the waist up, his arm outstretched in the direction of the tv; and his face laced in concentration with his eyes slightly narrowed reading each film synopsis. Wendy’s heart raged in her chest, reminding her of this undying love, as if she really needed that reminder. 

“Get your perfect little ass in here.” Mary snapped his gaze towards the door and Wendy yelped in surprise. 

“Asshole!” She clutched her chest and blushed as she pushed the door open. 

“Most of the time.” Mary agreed. “What were you doing just standing there?” He chuckled and shook his head before turning his gaze back to the tv screen. 

It wasn’t easy to just say it, but the words seemed to fall from her lips quicker than she could process. 

“I was watching you…thinking how fucking lucky I am to have this gorgeous man whom I’ve adored for a long time, now in my bed… _our _bed.” Wendy bit the inside of her cheek. “I just catch myself in awe, now that I feel more at ease to think; and I guess I’m afraid if I blink, it will all have been a daydream.”__

__Mary sported a crooked grin as he placed the remote beside him and motioned for Wendy. She wasn’t the least bit reluctant; in fact, she practically leaped on the bed to be close to him._ _

__

__C’mere.” He motioned closer until his arm was around her pulling Wendy’s face against the crook of his neck._ _

__“I don’t want to—”_ _

__“You’ll know if you are. So just relax and enjoy the moment, alright?” He huffed playfully and pulled her just a little tighter against him._ _

__They laid there together, cuddling for the first time in a long time. A hint of assurance sweeping over Wendy as she nuzzled her face into his neck for a whiff of his bodywash._ _

__“Blink a million times, baby doll, and I will still be here.” Mary smiled softly. “Sure we both spent some time daydreaming about this, but now that we’re here…it’s real and ain’t going nowhere. I’m not leaving, you’re not leaving. I’ll always be in this bed every night waiting for my gorgeous girlfriend to come in, cuddle up in my arms and watch another shitty movie…that’s life now, and that’s the way it’s gonna stay.”_ _

__“Promise?” Wendy whispered her warm breath against his skin._ _

__“Fuck yeah I promise; hands down the easiest promise I’ve ever made.” Mary pecked the side of her head just as a delivery drive knocked at the front door. “I also promise to help you demolish all that food too.”_ _

__A small chuckle rumbled in Wendy’s chest and she sat up, reluctant to leave his side. However, Mary was just short of eating a pillow if he didn’t have some food soon, which he made very clear as he whined about her sloth-like movements._ _

__“Gonna eat this damn pillow in the next five minutes if I don’t get somethin’ soon.” Mary pouted._ _

__“You’re such a hangry little bitch.” Wendy’s laughed quickly turned to a cackle and Mary gasped dramatically. The look of shock quickly faded to a devilish grin and he ultimately agreed that he was in fact a hangry bitch. He always was right before a meal, and that hadn’t seemed to change._ _

__However, Wendy wasn’t one to torture, and quickly gathered the large bag of boxes from the delivery guy before grabbing some drinks and napkins. Who needs proper plates anyway when you have cardboard to use?_ _

__Mary’s eyes lit up yet again at the bag hanging from her hand. Like a kid in a candy store he hurried to help her open all the boxes, carefully placed all over the towels covering the bed; a smart move on Wendy’s part to avoid grease stains._ _

__“Fuck, babe, we ordered way too much, didn’t we?” Mary’s eyes glanced over each box, five in total not counting the paper bag full of sauce and spices, per his request._ _

__“Eh, whatever is left we’ll have as lunch tomorrow.” Wendy shrugged before picking up a cheese stick._ _

__“What?” She mumbled and quickly covered her mouth, now full of cheese and sauce. “Do I have something on my face?”_ _

__Mary just smiled and shook his head, admiring Wendy, hoping to keep everything about this moment and feeling somewhere deep in his mind for a rainy day._ _

__“You’re beautiful.” Mary shrugged and grabbed a fry to pop in his mouth._ _

__“Hardly.” Dee snorted._ _

__“I will always win this fight, Dee; which, we’ve been having for years now.” He smirked and turned his attention to the television as a newer horror film began to play._ _

__Dee didn’t fight with him because he was right, he would win. He always won. Mary hated it when she talked down about herself, seeing Dee in a completely different way than she ever saw herself. But this moment wasn’t just about Wendy looking beautiful, this moment was about realizing that everything had fallen into place the way it should have been all along. Mary naked in bed, Dee barely covered by a slinky robe, but surrounded by food and enjoying some shitty horror movie neither one had seen before. This was what it was all about._ _

__After eating more than one should ever consume, Wendy boxed everything up and shoved it into the fridge before snuggling up to Mary the best that she could, and quickly fell asleep. However, Mary did not experience the same fate. For a moment he laid there watching her slow breaths, the rising and falling of her chest, completely overwhelmed by the love and security between them. Then…Mary thought about all of the events that transpired over the last twenty-four hours; specifically the fact that Dee was refusing the do the show. It was not a conversation worth having right now, however, but something he hoped to convince her of over the next few days. She deserved to be happy and feel special, and damnit it! Mary wanted to see his girl doing one of the many things she does best!_ _


End file.
